This is going to be a long post- I warn you!
I have alot running around in my mind right now. It consists
of two areas of friendship- so here goes:

Friend's:
**************
Awhile ago I deleted one person off my list. It happened after
a thought I'd had- after reading a post of theirs awhile back.
After reading this post- the first thought that came to my mind was- Wow why am I friend's with this person? I hit the delete button. I felt guilty and wanted to write an e-mail explaining why I deleted them- but I could'nt write it. So I chickened out.
I did not want to hurt their feelings. Bad enough I had deleted them. It was'nt just one post that had bothered me- it was
many things. I went about life and tried to put it out of my mind. Then I recieved two brief e-mails. The first was like-
"I have'nt been on your friend's list for awhile." I deleted it trying to ignore the situation. Second e-mail came in-
"Your true colors are showing." I deleted that one too.

Then my mind started running on about it. How do you explain something to someone when you don't want to hurt them.
Well I guess you can't do it without some hurt. If they truely
are your friend- would they not know how you feel?

I had added this person when they were first new here. Did'nt really know them too well. Got to know them through the posts and e-mails over time. That is when I relized I did'nt want to keep being friend's with them. I just let the feelings slide
and did nothing cause I did'nt want to hurt them. They remained on my list. Till that fateful day- when that one post I read just threw me in a tissy and I thought enough is enough!
The day I deleted them off my list.

Well all this got me thinking about friend's and friendship.
We can't be friend's with everyone in this world. Some of us just don't click and we are better off not being firend's.
I'm not perfect- never said I was. I don't like hurting people
at all. So I did'nt do anything.

This lead me to several thoughts about friendships and friend's. What are the things that lead us to develope friend's, and what are the things that
stop us from being friend's with some? Four thoughts stick out right now:

1.) Drama- I am not into it, will avoid it, and don't need it.
I have enough going on in life- without it!

2.) Game playing- The either your with me or your not game.
We are not in kindergarten any more...geesh! I don't like picking sides and will not do that- espeically when being forced.

3.) We all have things we are passionate about- that are near and dear to us. How can we be friend's with someone who rips up and shred's our passion's in life?

4.) Beliefs/Religions: We all have our own beliefs or religion's. It does'nt bother me if some believes or not. What bothers me is being a hipocrite. You can not force thing's
down peoples throats. You can't live one way and exspect people to live it another way. The do as I say- not as I do clause!

Well I feel bad enough but- My TRUE COLORS are allways showing... I am only human. I am not going to like everyone.
Sorry. Guess I have to work on the tell it like it is...more.

Then theres the second part of this post...

The friend's list:
***************************
Just because a person is not on your list- does'nt mean they are'nt your friend. We really don't need a list to know who our friend's are. There are many people in here that I am friend's with- but they are'nt all on my list. Does'nt make them any less a friend.
Yet there are some people in our life times that we
will never be able to be friend's with. It is just a part of life! So list or no list- if I call you my friend- Your
a friend...

Well that ought to get some thoughts stirring in here on friendship...

((((( Ms Teddy ))))))

I have one thought,,, Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm I love you and am blessed with your friendship,, You my dear have shown me how to live life again,, and ya didn't even no it,,, My love to you beautiful... always there when I need ya the most

Love

Just because people are on your friends list doesn't mean they're a friend either.

WOW!!!! I can completely relate to all that you said. I have been faced with something similar. How can you add someone to your friends list when you know absolutely NOTHING about that person?

(((MsTeddy)))

I agree with you whole heartedly (((Ms. Teddy)))).

It's all about taking care of our selves.

Thanks for the post MsTeddy

a friend should bring out the best in you. they will let you know that you are wrong even if it does hurt you. and knowing that they are a friend them, telling you that your in the wrong is just out of care for you. but afriend knows that you are worth being a friend too. how many friends can you have a really be a good friend with them. it is good to be friendly to others but how far you want that friendliness to go is still your choice.like they say not everyone will like you,so being honest to yourself about how you feel about someone is good. don't beat yourself up over taking care of yourself.

Teddy -- Let me tell you a little story.

There used to be a guy on here who started a lot of trouble. The first post I ever made, he replied with something really nasty and vulgar; he wound up getting himself suspended several times by doing stuff like that.

He came back from one suspension and started sending the most vulgar and abusive e-mails you can imagine, through this site, to a 70-something-year-old man, who was only here trying to make some friends. Why this guy picked him to abuse, I have no idea, but he did.

Anyway, the poor elderly fellow contacted me and asked me for some help with this situation. I helped him report the incidents, and the perpetrator finally got permanently banned. He tried to sneak in later under anouther user name, but got caught again.

The reason I bring this up is because this guy had friends here -- people who stood behind him and supported his constant abuse of others on the site. I still can't figure out how anyone could condone this kind of behavior, but they did. Maybe they were afraid he would turn his venom on them, if they didn't support him. I don't know.

But it turned out that a couple of his friends were also on my friends list, and they took themselves off my list when this last event happened. They were mad at me for sticking up for the victim.

And I have to admit, I'm glad they took themselves off my list, because I really have no desire to be friends with anyone who could condone the senseless abuse of a man in his 70s. I don't need people like that in my life.

So -- sometimes you just don't know about people. Sometimes it takes awhile for their true colors to show. Some people really shouldn't be on your friends list. And there's nothing wrong with acknowledging that.

Teddy, there's nothing wrong with the decision you made. You can't spend too much time worrying about it. You are who you are, and none of us can be friends with everybody.

I don't know what was in the person's post that caused you to change your mind, but I think you should trust your instincts. If it caused you to see this person in a different light, well, maybe that's a good thing, a way of you reaching the point of seeing something that just isn't worth dealing with anymore.

Personally, I have always considered you to be one of the most caring and positive people here, and we're going back many months now....

Trust yourself, trust your judgment.

Oh so true

teddy i love you dearly you are such a kind person. i understand completely what you are saying.

yes lex, i understand your story about the 70 year old man...im dealing with a situation myself of which i can not seem to get much help with, so i ignor it and go on.

everywhere you go there are unpleasant people. its life. we cant please everyone. and yes, i have found that people whom i thought were my friends were really not.

xoxoxoxox to you guys!!!

MsTeddy We are friends

Uhmmm, can I say something?

When we decide to join a dating site such as this we should always put in mind that NOT all people we meet on here are true. Why I say this? WE NEVER KNOW who hides from where and there is no criminal charge against anyone who would misbehave online. Plus, be willing to take the risk. Didnt almost all our parents keep reminding us "Do not talk to strangers."?

Hmmm, just my brain stirring

GWEN!!!

get over here n gimme huggz.!!!

Ohhhhh so true MsTeddy one does not have to be on your friends list to be considered a friend. But I do understand your reasons for what you did I at one time had a couple that was on my friends list and had made it to myspace also as friends. But....... then they did something that blew my mind we had someone post one night about wanting to kill themselves they jumped in and went as far as to tell the poor kid to put it on cam for all to see totaly egging him on. I found out about it a couple days later it made me sick at my stomach. I then proceeded to delete them out of my life I did not feel as if I owed them any reasons for it. That was totaly uncalled for and I don't need anyone in my life that would do anything like that to another human being.

Humm Lex heck now I've never been on your friends list but if I recall the problem your talking about I did not agree with what happen and offered all I could to help out the elderly gentleman myself he was but tooo sweet to everyone my heart went out to him he was so upset in what happen.

So Kuddos to friends for they don't have to be on a list for me to talk to them.

Well written and very true....

Thanks for sharing MsTeddy

WHAT JOSHY! I like your girl!

Friends!
I see alot here!




Speaking of friends- has anyone seen or heard from OldJeb???
I hope he is ok. Haven't seen him in here in ages. Starting to worry about him.

are you madat me, woman?!?