Have you ever known someone, here or elsewhere, that objectively is very attractive but you have no attraction/interest? I'm not necessarily talking about someone with emotional, behavioral, or other characteristics that were a turn off. I'm thinking more along the lines of someone you should be really drawn to but are not. And if so, why do you think that is?

Maybe.

The law of physics.

magnetic repulsion?

Pretty much.


Distance is something of a factor.

Yup. I like men who are not super good-looking. People rave about how smexy they are. I like deep wrinkles from a hard working or thinking man, rough hands, like my Dads were and eyes that tell a story.

No


There's no Chemistry.

I learned a long time ago that I am into women for many various reasons. I've dated the girl I thought was out of my league....and I have dated the girl I always felt was my "type". It just depends on the person.

No, not really. I figured out that if it's a woman, she isn't attracted to me. They only are if they happen to be at least 2000 miles away from me. And I should send them money so they can come visit me.

Wow, I am really close on this one. Well, maybe my wrinkles are shallow and not deep.

Maybe they are just playing it cool.

Yes! Usually it's because their energy doesn't click/resonate with me. Most of the time it has been with those who I have met in person, either locally offline or someone I met in person from an online site. Basically, there's no chemistry.

For those online that I haven't met face to face or chatted with privately, there has been one or two. But, for the most part, there is usually some kind of attraction until after we start interacting, and it disappears once that interaction begins. I suppose in those cases, it's more the idea of the person I'm attracted to, but once we start chatting, the energy just doesn't feel right.

I have met more though, in the last few years, who regardless of my attraction to them, just didn't feel it with me. Could be because I had built a wall around my heart so not to be hurt again, and to protect myself while I started a new life. In doing so, it put a kind of "not approachable" energy field around me. Kind of like an insect repellent, haha. As much as that flower (me) looks good, you (they) instinctively avoid it.

Yes River and maybe a combination of everything you've mentioned but hey don't worry about it, it's all part of growth as we make our way through this mystery of our lives. You certainly wouldn't be the first to wall yourself in after bad experiences and as you said in our "internet times" sometimes our expectations for that other person turn out to be incorrect. We just have to hope that the other person is nice enough to understand these things and both can move on with no ill will toward the other. I know I've had similar experiences as you've described. Be yourself and have faith in yourself.

Yeah, Sara Jessica Parker.

Couldn't in my wildest nightmare see myself waking up next to that face.

Yes, I'm not attracted to men who are prettier than me. lol jk... not! I'm attracted to men with a good sense of humour, but it must be in sync with mine. If a you can make me laugh, I love you already.

I was too tired to read it properly last night, but yes. And like others said, no chemistry.
It doesn't matter how attractive someone is or should be, if the chemistry isn't there then nothing is there.

Thank Girth, for the encouragement. I'm actually not worried about it, having insight as to what blocks you from connecting with someone or others is a great thing. It sets things in motion to do something about it. And I have complete faith in myself that I'll continue to face whatever I need to in order to tear down that wall completely. There's already quite a few holes in it, a few more and it will come tumbling down.

sometimes it is that simple .., however there is a spectrum of attraction . It can simply be indifference resulting from a lack of positive sexual triggers/cues .

Physical attraction does not just happen visually but also on a subconscious level . In the first few seconds we see someone we do this amazing scan not just with our eyes but also our mind .., both consciously and subconsciously . We can see someone that we determine we should be attracted to , however if other cues or triggers are absent our level of attraction/connection does not fire or is slow to fire .., One of the downfalls of seeing an attractive photo on the internet for example is that we are basing that assessment on body language cues captured in a moment in time ... in a way it is an artificial connection without a psychological /emotional /hormonal connection . Visually we can rate someone as attractive , subconsciously that is much more complex .

Do you know that a silk worm moth can smell a mate six and a half miles away !!!!!!’ We don’t have that ability but we are however programmed with a type of sexual radar that is very sensitive to initiating and responding to triggers that activate attraction or lack of it .

So basically .. visual attraction is more complicated and involves subconscious triggers .

Sometimes when I see a glamorized woman, the emphasis on artificial accentuation, detracts from her inherent attractiveness in my eyes.

Many women use adders. If you strip them off you have a different
Woman. Best to see her real face and body up close, to know if you still
Want that .

Enhancements are big these days. It's not always what you see
Is what you get.

Easy to fool many Men online.