Following a night out with a few friends, Paddy brought them back to
show off his new flat.
After the grand tour, the visitors were rather puzzled by a large gong
taking pride of place in the lounge.
"What's that big brass gong for Paddy ?" one of the guests asked,
"Why, that's my Speaking Clock," Paddy replied.
"How does it work?"
"I'll show you", Paddy said, giving the gong an ear-shattering blow with
an unpadded hammer.
Suddenly, a voice from the other side of the wall screamed, "For,
***** sake, you *****, it's twenty to two in the ****ing morning!!"