Have things to say but dont want to ruin everyones easter. I guess it can wait.

Aw, now curiosity is going to get to us, Karen. You don't want to be a cat killer do ya? You know curiousity killed the cat.

Thanks Roy, but I have a problem I don't want to elaborate on but I have the answers to all my concerns, I just don't want to accept them. If I do one thing, I'm a thief a whore and a liar, if I do something else, I lose control of my life, if I do soemthing else I go bankrupt.......there's more but I think you get the idea. And I really have no one to talk to about it because of the nature of the problem.

Oh ok. Damned if you do and damned if you don't. I hope you can find someone that you can trust and share you problem with. I know a problem shared is a problem halved. Good luck with it. Peace be with you.

yeah you could say that. No one I want to talk to about this problem. They won't tell me anything I dont already know but it doesnt make it any less painful. Been going on for some time now and Im stuck. I brought this on myself and I suspect I will have to just suffer for my own actions.

Hopefully you won't have to suffer alone. One of the reasons I work so much is that I don't handle being alone too well. It used to not bother me so bad. And some days are better than others. If I stay alone too long my ex's advice from the distant past starts haunting me. I can my ex telling me that I just brought it on myself. Sometimes I wish I could just take whiteout to my mind.

((((( Rainbow, Karen ))))) I just wanted to stop by and say Happy Easter to you both,, And Rainbow Its taking me some time To catch up on your Poems,, I can say I am so enjoying myself,,

Hugs to you both

U2 Denise

I am glad you are enjoying reading them. I love writing poetry. It helps me so much to write it. Some days I get real squirrelly. Maybe that is why I have had this fascination with squirrells lately.

white out to my life feels better to me right now. i know i have to go back to school tomorrow, & my mind will hopefully be busy. last day of modling, thank god. just sick of everything. whiner i am tonight......i hate when i do this.

Karen

Rainbow,, I hear squirrley is a good thing,, You keep writing and I'll Keep reading,,,

feeling totally helpless sucks boners...wtf is going on in the threads lately? men against the women, pity threads(including me)and all the effing blood and guts people. are we being invaded by emo, goth, crybabies and people who pray then post nasty (joke) threads about jesus? wtf??? this becoming a circus and i never liked the circus and it aint cuz of the clowns.

my helpless problem aside....which has nothing to do with my former rant, I really do wish I could whiteout my life. I want to do something and I can because of my kids. Thier step mom tried to kill herself and very nearly did taking pills. Lithium to be exact. Ive been there and nearly died too. The exit is starting to look pretty good right about now.

all right now Karen, pull yourself together....think of your kids.....that's what I do when I get like this......I hope you feel better soon hon

just venting.....i'll live. thanks for the concern. I'm gonna take my meds and go to sleep. g'nite all

ok Karen, you just worried me.....i get like that sometimes.......g'nite

Did everyone else have a good Easter?

Glad you were just venting, Karen and hope you get plenty of rest. I am having a good Easter. One of my friends was calling me from work. I was worried it was work wanting me to come in on my day off. Didn't get to the phone fast enough. My friend asked me in the background from another friend who called me why I didn't answer her call. They are both married. I have a whole bunch of women's phone numbers on my cell now and just almost everyone of them have a boyfriend or they are married. And would you believe it they are almost all job related? It is about if one needs me to go get them in case their car breaks down or if one of the nurses needs me to fill in. God, I need a real life. But you know what I have found? Everyone gets bored at one time or another. I even have men on my cell phone. Hmmm, I have come a long way. Nice to have friends. I can remember when my dog was my closest friend. Hmm, maybe I should put my dog on my cell. But alas she doesn't have a cell phone. Nice to be off from work tonight.

i would not be surprised if they came with a cell phone for dogs..........

Well I talked to the same lawyer that helped my dad get on disability....he took the case, but didn't make promises as to the certainty of my winning....he seems really nice and wants to help me.....i guess it helped too that i was so nervous that i kind of zoned out while i was there.