Topic: Alternative lifestyle
no photo
Wed 10/16/19 10:44 PM
Hi, we all talk about love and relationships. While you are happy with your partner, how do you satiate your thirst for some kinks that are deep within you. Would borrowing a partner for satisfying each other’s kinks be a good idea? I am pondering over this right now and seems to be in agreement for borrowing. I would like to hear from you all about this :)

delightfulillusion's photo
Wed 10/16/19 10:53 PM
Borrow a partner? BORROW???

Go talk it over with your own partner and leave everyone else's alone!

Rock's photo
Thu 10/17/19 01:01 AM
I don't share.

no photo
Thu 10/17/19 02:23 AM
Have you pondered this idea with your partner? If not, that would be a better idea.
It's never a good idea to cheat on your partner. The way to satiate those kinks is to discuss them with your current partner and work out the kinks together. If it's impossible and you're still finding yourself pondering over finding someone else to satisfy you, perhaps you're not with the right partner.

Freebird Deluxe's photo
Thu 10/17/19 05:38 AM
Far better to lease one

Dodo_David's photo
Thu 10/17/19 06:17 AM

Hi, we all talk about love and relationships. While you are happy with your partner, how do you satiate your thirst for some kinks that are deep within you. Would borrowing a partner for satisfying each other’s kinks be a good idea? I am pondering over this right now and seems to be in agreement for borrowing. I would like to hear from you all about this :)


No, there is no excuse for committing adultery.

I_love_bluegrass's photo
Thu 10/17/19 08:44 AM

Hi, we all talk about love and relationships. While you are happy with your partner, how do you satiate your thirst for some kinks that are deep within you. Would borrowing a partner for satisfying each other’s kinks be a good idea? I am pondering over this right now and seems to be in agreement for borrowing. I would like to hear from you all about this :)


"your thirst"??

Did you not discuss this with your now partner in the beginning of the relationship?

If not, boo...that's YOUR fault, and NOT an excuse to cheat.

If you *did*, and you found that they didn't share the same kinks, or had no interest..or you thought they wouldn't mind you inflicting it on them..well, again..your fault, and NOT an excuse for cheating.

Grow up.

oldkid46's photo
Thu 10/17/19 08:50 AM
If you want to "play" either have your partner's permission or "play" as a couple. As a couple is probably the best solution; it definitely needs to be discussed honestly!!! If you are unwilling to bring up the subject with your partner, you don't have any right to explore.

motowndowntown's photo
Thu 10/17/19 09:40 AM
I won't lend ya my pick-up, and I won't lend ya my partner either.

soufiehere's photo
Thu 10/17/19 10:15 AM
Fantasies are not meant to be lived out,
they are just that, fantasies.

So I would suggest doing what others do,
watch a little porn, leave your relation-
ship intact.

no photo
Thu 10/17/19 11:00 AM
we all talk about love and relationships.

Not really.
Mostly "we" idealize, romanticize, and gossip.

People that are actually in loving relationships don't hang out on dating sites talking about their own love and relationships.

What "we" talk about is mostly ideology. Virtue signalling and stroking/masturbating our own egos in a "safe space" where others can be kept beyond the screen. To prove our own superiority among a minority group (those that actively participate and form shallow "relationships" with those online), or generate a false sense of control over reality by predefining it and pursuing those that validate it.

Unless by "we" you are talking about "society in general" and that means the global population of all human beings everywhere.

Then "we all" talk but nothing much is ever really said and it's pointless to really ascribe any meaning to what that "we" talks about.


While you are happy with your partner, how do you satiate your thirst for some kinks that are deep within you

By communicating and pursuing them with my partner.
That's part of the reason they're there.
They may even come up with better ideas and new avenues in which to explore.

Would borrowing a partner for satisfying each other’s kinks be a good idea?

Depends.
In accomplishing your goal, whom does it serve and whom does it hurt?
What would be the consequences of transparency in your relationship?
What do you think the risks, costs, and consequences are/will be in the attempt at accomplishing your goal?

mzrosie's photo
Thu 10/17/19 03:29 PM
Edited by mzrosie on Thu 10/17/19 03:30 PM
You are happy with your partner so keep it that way. You are luckier than some.

P.S. and get off dating sites!!!!!

no photo
Thu 10/17/19 03:52 PM

Hi, we all talk about love and relationships. While you are happy with your partner, how do you satiate your thirst for some kinks that are deep within you. Would borrowing a partner for satisfying each other’s kinks be a good idea? I am pondering over this right now and seems to be in agreement for borrowing. I would like to hear from you all about this :)
your profile says you are married with children . You mention bdsm . If that is the alternative lifestyle you seek , have you discussed it with your wife ?? That should really be your first priority . waving

kmarm's photo
Thu 10/17/19 06:29 PM
I think the whole concept has become overblown. Polyamory was huge in Salt Lake for awhile until all the 20-something dudes got over their, "best friend-lovers" bringing random dudes home from dates for a shag and having to listen the whole affair through the walls. Call me old fashioned but I think there needs to be a well defined domain of, "we really love each other" and "this is mostly casual/for fun but perhaps with some romance thrown in" Trying to mix the two is like mixing oil and water.