Men like that are Online too !!

Fixed it for you... And yes, I see clueless and bitter people everywhere.

so true waterloo. this medium you can rethink and edit any response before you push send. in real live conversations you can't do that at all and you surely can't un say an oops

*I* said that way earlier in the thread..

That when some guy says he doesn't do well on here..he'd rather talk in person or on the phone...
I feel if he can't express hiself fairly well on *here*, where he has time to consider what he is saying before he sends it, and is in a relaxed, no-stress enviroment (home)....I SERIOUSLY doubt he'd be any better a conversationalist in person, when he has to think on-the-fly face to face with someone.....

This is what happens when you start at the begining of a day old 5 page thread.
as for your golf cart driving park attendant...
i would simply make it a point sooner than later to attend another event there and chime in with "fancy meeting you here".
even if it is not a first choice event

LOL
I said *that too*...
That I have been watching the park website for events, and so far nothing...except a Fall Star Gaze..which won't work, as I addressed earlier..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iNPiql-pnLc

You need to edit the s off the link to make it clickable.

Hmmm...when *I* touch it with my cursor..*I* can click it.
I wasn't aware there was some other way..

But if for some reason someone *can't* do that...I'll go and take of the s...

You can click it with the s, but it doesn't go to the link. That's better.

I try to be aware the majority of time to my surrounding and people in them, be friendly and approachable. The great thing I find about online forums tho is the opportunity to get to know others that I would never "meet" in daily life because of their location. I view the internet and forums as an "added" friend finder. As far as approaching someone to say ask if they would like to grab a beer or coffee sometime, I don't think I'd be comfortable doing that, being old fashioned I guess.............

The interwebz, is but one small avenue
in the search grid.

Of no more importance, than grocery stores,
craft stores, sporting goods, laundry mats,
etc...

But, the internet is still a part of the search
grid.

I feel social media (facebook,dating sites) has eroded people's social skills . Just go out in public what do you see people talking on their phone, listening to music (guilty lol),texting, instead of interacting with those around them ,also think all these gadgets isolate peope.

I am not a pushy person, but am not shy either. I often ask a man to reach something for me on the higher shelf in the grocery store. Smile and say I'm just not tall enough. No takers so far as to move the conversation forward. I don't have dogs anymore, but do buy cat food, which allows me to ask WHAT KIND OF DOG/CAT do you have? while in that aisle. Shopping in Home Depot or Menards, I never hesitate to ask where is the "whatever" even if I am standing right in front of it.
Sure, some of the guys are probably married, not wearing a ring. Some are just kids, but SOME are JUST RIGHT - I did take a bath, comb my hair and dress up a little bit, but no social skills on the other end. I Did have a great dog/cat conversation with a nice man in that pet aisle a few weeks ago, but evidently he was already involved with someone or thought I wasn't his type, and although I enjoyed that 5 minutes of actual face to face talk, I came home not knowing if he even had a name. It's not easy to meet people.

I don't find it any easier .

But I think its just symptomatic of modern life. My grandad used to say years ago, that the t.v. has ruined the art of conversation. This is just 1 step beyond that. Now every1 is glued to their phones. That have microphones, cameras, motion detectors, and can be used to find your location and hack into other devices. I bet the governments hate that
In short people are idiots. Who continually do stupid things . Often for convenience. Like microwaves, and McDonalds. We vote for morons. Use plastic . Buy petrol.
We eradicate our minds, morals and freedoms, because its convenient and easier. Oo, you'll never change it, people say. Just go with the flow, don't swim against the tide, another thing they say. Many people don't like to admit the truth. Ask them, do they like banks, they say no. Do you trust banks, they say no. Do you put your money in the bank. They say yes.
What more can I say

Why do some people believe it is easier


Unjustified belief is usually caused by some sort of delusion.
On a different take, justified belief can assist with building wisdom.

There are 'some' people that have great success using this medium and build wisdom from those 'good' experiences. They have a 'favorable' opinion of it.

There are also many people that use this medium without success and experience bad things. These people have an unfavorable opinion yet continue to make the same mistakes over and over which indicates no wisdom is learned.

The reasons for someone using this medium to find someone are as diverse as the individual. Problems occur when they delude themselves thinking it is a catch-all, complete process. There are some that thrive on misery so they decline every offer for a multitude of reasons and get stuck in perpetual failure.

This medium is merely a tool to allow you to find someone close to your preferences so you can actually interact with them face to face.
Like scanning a bar, museum, library in search of someone you might approach. Its a introductory resource.

In today's world of cell phones, high speed internet and WiFi, virtual presence is becoming more and more commonplace. I don't believe it is a bad choice to use this medium but I do believe that face to face is the most important and a vital second step.

Just like in real life, one must take a chance or the medium is ineffective. A lot of people get stuck and refuse to meet face to face, constantly blaming others or the tool for their inability to act.
A deluded mindset.

There are two distinct ways to use this tool.
One is positive, the other is negative.
For a positive result, one must look for the positives that do match their preferences. They meet face to face and experience the person in real life.
In a negative method, one looks for disqualifications on every profile which yields untenable results. They meet nobody face to face. That 'failure' is a personality issue not a tool issue.

Many are post-traumatic and think their bad experiences are because of the people they find, ignoring the 'potentials' for a good experience.
Sometimes they fill in the blanks with bad assumptions and disqualify everyone so they don't have to take a chance at another 'potential' failure.

As for the medium itself, people are curious, seeking knowledge and understanding and this medium does provide ample samples.

Amen, Animal lover..

That's my point..
At the dozens of events I have been to where there are guys interested in the same things (one anyway..why else would they be at a Old Time Music festivsal, eh?) where I'm dressed nice, clean, etc...and I attempt a conversation with anyone, they either mumble a few words and walk off...or just look at me and walk away.
That *last* one happened to me in Bowling Green KY at a bluegrass jam.
It was a pot luck..and I saw a new guy i hadn't seen before..no ring.
So, I went up to the table of food on the pretense of getting another couple napkins..and commented on the different things...saying "this here is *really* good..that there, I'm not sure what that is...the drinks are in the kitchen, in case you didn't know.." (since he was new)"
As a way to break the ice, be friendly..start a conversation..
Thisd guy looked at me and *walked away* without a word.
I could have sworn i saw a trace of a sneer.

Now, on the *outside* chance he possibly thought I was being patronizing or something..he *could* have said "I know all that..I'm not stupuid" or ~something~...not just look at me like I was vbeneath contempt, and walk away.

After a while of being ignored, or treated like something someone found stuck to the bottom of their shoe...you kind of give up the in person stuff.

At least on dating sites..if they look at your picture and think you disgusting/ ugly...you don't have to see it in their face.

I think your right ... I live rural ... and believe most every one is with someone in my area ... or if not their to young ... but I travel out of my area ... and have been friendly to the people ... I see but again some are married ... now yesterday I saw a man ... while shopping and we kinda kept running into each other ... and our eyes would meet ... but for the life of me I could not see if he was wearing a ring ...
or I might have said more to him ... I seem to get a lot of older men married or not ... but stay clear of them ...
believe set in their ways ... but I am not rude to them ... and their is another man ... I happen to like ... but I believe I have to stay clear in the romantic way with him ... becouse he is not able and might have someone else ... an besides raising his kids ... others I have meet or talked on the phone to ... where sometimes to pushy for my tastes ... and doing LD ... I would hate to have to meet someone and he or me not have that spark that is needed ... and this can be complicated ... an they say love will find you when you least expect it ... so what choice do I have but to wait ... but I do enjoy the honesty from the men in the forums ... and think their cool ...

First of all, I'd like to thank everyone for their contributions to this point. There have been many well thought out posts, and I do appreciate it.

Everyone I'm close to (family and good friends) have met their significant other out in the real world (except my younger daughter who is currently dating a turd she met through tinder, hopefully she will flush this turd soon), so it could be argued that my point of view is a bit skewed.

I started the thread because of a knee jerk reaction to all the lame and hopeless "Hi, I'm looking for love" type posts. People that apparently haven't a clue about much of anything when it comes to interacting let alone finding someone in this vast wasteland.

Some of the posts have caused me to reflect on why things can be so much easier for some and I realized my approach online was never much different than in the real world. Would I just walk up to someone in the real world, and say "Hi!?" Probably not. I'm more likely to start a conversation based on things that are happening around me ("Did you just see that?") I'm essentially the same here.

In the final analysis, at least for me, the lack of non-verbal cues in this medium always made it more difficult to see into the soul... In most cases non verbal communication is more than half of a face to conversation.

The only thing that I think is easier about online stuff, is that people online openly CLAIM to be unmarried and looking for mates.

In the "real world," I have to GUESS.