I will tell the whole incident later on but on a general note what you all think about a relationship which starts with a white lie?

White lie --> A lie told for a good/evaluation purpose

Been lied to too many times so I probably wouldn't be very tolerant of any lying at all. White, purple, green or any other color.

everyone may not have the same idea of a white lie


like, if you have been married or have kids or were a , convicted of pedophilia, rape, or murder or are bisexual or gay or trans,,,and you omit or lie about it,,,

I think that's probably a huge problem

lol

if you lie about loving salad,,,not so much of a problem

Bad idea. Seriously, if you have to lie to get a relationship, then you will continue to lie.

well said!

The only thing a lie is going to do is breed more lie's

you mean like " nice to meet you"

A lie is a lie, there is no "good" lie. It's deceit and trickery. If a relationship starts off on a white lie, it starts off on a lie, starts off on something that ain't true. So therefore how could the relationship be true?

All depends on what the white lie was...

And how simple it was to me the term white lie is something that is like sure you look good in that..... no they don't hate you.... ect Sure I like your family....


To basic of a question....

If they are lying about cheating, prison or jail records and what they were in for then that is not a white lie..

White lies are normally those small things that is not bad just keeps from hurting your feelings... nothing major..

But....regardless starting off any relationship with any sort of lies is not good.. and will only bite you in the azz later..

Why would someone ask a question they do not actually want the answer to? eg., getting upset if the answer isn't what they wanted? Telling them the truth in this area, would actually help the relationship. It would allow the "person" to know what the spouse likes or doesn't like as in this example clothing.

Because then the spouse will think the other liked it or enjoyed it and would continue to wear it and or buy similar outfits/clothing. If one wants too truly make the other "spouse" happy, then why would they not want the true thoughts on the situation so that they can either continue to do as such and even maybe expand that onto other elements of the relationship or stop doing that/wearing that as to make the other happy. Because happiness in a relationship comes from the happiness of the spouse :)

Kinda depends on the lie.

Other than that, doesn't really matter.
Relationships work or don't, continue or end, based on a lot more than one single "white lie" told at the beginning.

I mean lots of people are so enamored with someone they'll accept any lie, no matter how light or dark.


How you judge your motives or intentions, telling a lie for a "good" purpose is irrelevant.

You will never have a conversation go like:
You: "I told you this one white lie at the very beginning of our relationship, but it was for a good purpose."

Her: "Well, normally I'd dump you for lying to me...but since you said it was for a good reason, I have to accept that, and now I'm obligated to stick around since I can't dump someone that has good motives, so I will continue being in this relationship giving it my 100% and having this information not effect me whatsoever...darn it, why did you have to say it was for a good reason, your intentions mean I can't feel a certain way."

White lie to start a relationship....hmmmmmm....let me think about that for a second.....yah! nope....Never.....If its a woman you are thinking about lying to....forget it...its not gonna work...she will smell it out...and you wont get anywhere with her.....Now if its a guy....go for it...he does not give a rat's azz anyway....

if you have to explain the incident, I don't understand how it can be a 'white lie'

Yes, there are such things as lies told for the best reasons. Out of genuine care for the person being lied to.

In the same way that there are such things as acts of violence which are for the best; false arrests which are for the best; theft for the best, and on and on.

The problem with all those things, is that it's extremely rare to find anyone who can be trusted to make the RIGHT "wrong decision" every time. The vast majority of the times when people tell lies, and pretend that they only told an excusable ones, the lies were entirely to their profit, and others loss.

The classic ones, are those that a scumbag tells, on the grounds that "if you knew the truth about me, you would have been sad or angry, so I protected you from those unpleasant emotions by lying."

So yeah, duh, you can't ask for a GENERAL get-out-of-jail-free card and THEN tell us why.


Spill first. THEN we'll tell you your status.

why lie at all? whats the point?

To trick you into going out with me.

does this dress make me look fat?
is my hair ok?
why would you want someone to lie about these types of things? if they're your mate, then wouldn't honesty be better for both people involved?

if you're partner thinks your fat and lies about it, then what good are they? being part of the problem isn't the answer...

lol... if i have to trick women into going out with me, then i don't need to date...

Bro every normal person lies in his life to make the situation easy or not to hurt someone's feelings. Example if your pregnant wife asks you "do I look fat?", you don't say "you look like a cow wearing a jeans" but rather you say "you look beautiful or no honey I love you". These white lies make life easier and happier. Ofcourse sometimes they also know you are lying but it is for something good so they also don't mind.

Just trying to insert a little humor into the thread.