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| Topic: Any One-Line Jokes to Spare? | |
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Edited by
joethebricky
on
Tue 04/26/16 02:49 PM
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I wondered why the frisbee was getting bigger, and then it hit me
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A married lawyer, had fun in
his car and forgot the girl’s panty on the car seat. His wife found the panty in the back seat and tore it apart screaming “What is this”? “What is this”? The lawyer calmly replied, “You just destroyed the evidence of a rape case which was worth millions of dollars that I was handling”. She quickly went on her knees apologizing, ‘babe, l’m sorry’. |
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When a dog wants to die; it does not hear the voice of it's owner 
That is a very true fact. Sad but true. 
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A married lawyer, had fun in his car and forgot the girl’s panty on the car seat. His wife found the panty in the back seat and tore it apart screaming “What is this”? “What is this”? The lawyer calmly replied, “You just destroyed the evidence of a rape case which was worth millions of dollars that I was handling”. She quickly went on her knees apologizing, ‘babe, l’m sorry’. 
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Edited by
kriszo101
on
Wed 04/27/16 01:07 PM
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Bob left work one Friday evening .
But it was payday , so instead of going home, he stayed out the entire weekend partying with his mates and spending his entire wages. When he finally appeared at home on Sunday night , he was confronted by his angry wife and was barraged for nearly two hours with a tirade befitting his actions . Finally his wife stopped the nagging and said to him, “ How would you like it if you didn’ t see me for two or three days?” He replied , “ That would be fine with me. ” Monday went by and he didn’ t see his wife . Tuesday and Wednesday came and went with the same results . But on Thursday , the swelling went down just enough where he could see her a little out of the corner of his left eye . |
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A woman gets on a bus with her baby .
The driver says : “ Ugh , that’ s the ugliest baby I ’ ve ever seen . ” The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down , fuming . She says to the man next to her : “ The driver just insulted me. ” The man says : “ You go up there and tell him off . Go on , I ’ ll hold your monkey for you . ” 
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Bob left work one Friday evening . But it was payday , so instead of going home, he stayed out the entire weekend partying with his mates and spending his entire wages. When he finally appeared at home on Sunday night , he was confronted by his angry wife and was barraged for nearly two hours with a tirade befitting his actions . Finally his wife stopped the nagging and said to him, “ How would you like it if you didn’ t see me for two or three days?” He replied , “ That would be fine with me. ” Monday went by and he didn’ t see his wife . Tuesday and Wednesday came and went with the same results . But on Thursday , the swelling went down just enough where he could see her a little out of the corner of his left eye . 
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A woman gets on a bus with her baby . The driver says : “ Ugh , that’ s the ugliest baby I ’ ve ever seen . ” The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down , fuming . She says to the man next to her : “ The driver just insulted me. ” The man says : “ You go up there and tell him off . Go on , I ’ ll hold your monkey for you . ”
Very funny....Thanks
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About a month before my Grandfather died we tried to help by covering him in olive oil, but after that he went down hill pretty quickly
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So, what's it like having voices in your head, I hear you ask
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I come from a family of police marksmen
Except for my grandfather, he was a bank robber He died recently, surrounded by his family |
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All three are very good. Thanks 
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Bob left work one Friday evening . But it was payday , so instead of going home, he stayed out the entire weekend partying with his mates and spending his entire wages. When he finally appeared at home on Sunday night , he was confronted by his angry wife and was barraged for nearly two hours with a tirade befitting his actions . Finally his wife stopped the nagging and said to him, “ How would you like it if you didn’ t see me for two or three days?” He replied , “ That would be fine with me. ” Monday went by and he didn’ t see his wife . Tuesday and Wednesday came and went with the same results . But on Thursday , the swelling went down just enough where he could see her a little out of the corner of his left eye .
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That's twice my mother-in-law has broken my JCB bucket!
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"Topic: Any One-Line Jokes to Spare?"
Ted Cruz formally named Carly Fiorina as his vice presidential running mate. If that isn't a joke, then I don't know what is. |
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"Topic: Any One-Line Jokes to Spare?" Ted Cruz formally named Carly Fiorina as his vice presidential running mate. If that isn't a joke, then I don't know what is. Glad to see I am not the only one that thinks so 
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How do you see this |
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How do you see this I have seen something similar while in Thailand a few years ago.
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How do you see this Singing: rain rain go away |
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