OK here it goes and I'm going insane on this .. even broke down at work. I broek it off and with the history of us -- I found out about lies being told as to a few other time when we broke it off he was in the sac with a certain female who was at one time one of his co-workers in just a few days. Same happened one another time but I found out in a different way and he never owuld confess to it so I let it go. Now we are done ... and once again the lies came about him and her talking and seeing each other.

If some one LOVES some one SO much then HOW can one go sleep wiht another right away? WAs I just a void in his life to take care of him and just so easily replaced?? and why the heck is it bothering me so much -- I broke it off!!!!! YEah I know i still love him but it is no good and he has lost my trust and so much more that even if I did trust him it would be about impossible for us to be together (major history family issues , his kids and mine!!!!)

Some one help me on how to let go!! Especially when you still love them!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(((Hugz)))

Sorry you feel so bad...
Sounds like you have done the best thing- by breaking it off.
Give your self time to morn...

what helped me was prayer
I prayed for those feelings to leave my heart
I know it sounds simple, but it worked

I know it hurts and I pray the pain will go away soon
take care

I wish I could just go out and get looped and dance and be able to even kiss some one else!!! Maybe I'm just too much of a prude and old fashioned for my own good!!
Believe me I've prayed!!! Still am and always will. I even cleaned all his pics out of my computer!!

heartsoul is right, I had to break it off with my ex g/f of 8 years. It was hard, but I found Christ to be the best way to help me heal. Pray for help, pray for life without hurt, God will lead the way hun. Sorry someone has torn you apart like this but he was not the one for you if he cheats he will always cheat. Hugs

don't let the next one have any candy until you know he knows how to cook and clean and do the dishes...no wut i meen, hun?

well you can't call it cheating if you broke it off right? SO I have no rights especially since I broke it off to even feel this way! That's what is so horrible! I feel like there is something wrong wiht me at this point. Like I'm some sort of control freak or something...
guess it just hurts ... why can't I get mad as heck instead of being a blubbering idiot UHG. I just need to some how gain composer for work tomorrow and the rest of the time!

Well say some prayers for me huh? THANKS!!!!!!!!!!!

Stay the way you are, you do not have to prove you are worthwhile. Believe it.

Concentrate on other things that make you feel good about yourself.

You deserve someone who will love and respect you, and someone you can trust.

guess it is time to grow up and and and do something!! Now is the time i REALLY need to be on a farm!! Nothing to do here to get my mind off of everything! rainy like cats and dogs out YUCK
I no -- no candy for the next one until he proves himself!! haahaa -- I just want to go to sleep but can't -- guess I'm going ot try again.

Thanks

keep your chin up, Its his loss, God has bigger and better plans for you and thats how you gotta look at it. Pickle is praying for you too.

Time heals all wounds (even of the heart)

Just go out with friends, stay busy, and in a couple of weeks it won't hurt soooo bad.

Be productive, do extra work, clean your house, whatever you have to to stay busy.

Countrysoul, his version of love, and your version are very different.

See it for what it is, he didn't and doesn't love you in the manner you require.

Really look at it, for what it is...

He hadn't earnt you, the woman you are, and the capacity you have for a relationship, with values, is by far more than his capacity.

You are worth more...

See him for what he is, abusive. Abusive of your trust, abusive to your intelligence, if someone lies to you, they are abusing you, your integrity, and your trust.

Step away from him, and what you think is love, and really look at it.

Then work on you, learn to really like you, and see the values that you have, that you are worth so much more, than he could offer....he didn't deserve you....and why would you want someone who doesn't value you, in your life?

Acceptance is the key I have found in dealing with such matters. The serenity prayer works for me.

Sometimes the honest person who breaks up the relationship is the bad guy because they are more mature and understand that to continue the relationship is to continue a lie.

I really have to agree with Jesse on this. I walked away from my love in September because of his game playing. I'm my own woman today, I'm not a doormat. I've worked hard to get where I am. I'm independent but not so independent where there isn't room for a great man. You have so much to offer girl -- don't settle; believe in yourself.
Good luck hon

Self imposed guilt from within can hurt as much if not more than guilt from without. Let go of the guilt and you will be free.

I let go already. Lotsa times. Wasn't ever easy though.
Had to throw myself into something. Keep occupied. De-focus.

What doesn't kill us, makes us stronger.
The pain is form giving your trust/heart & being used.
It will pass & you will be better for it.
Have a zoo close, ck on volunteering, would let you work with animals.

Are you repeating a scenario from another relationship in your life? Is it possible that you kept breaking up with him to see if he would prove how much you are loveable by pineing away? "Do you really love me" insecurities get old real fast. Sounds like grade school stuff. It is not cheating when you tell someone to move on and they do. You think something is going to sit on the shelf or be left on the shelf by others just for your comfort. Not happening. Maybe he just got tired of the headgames and trying to prove the impossible to you. Anyone who says they don't want me once is enough for me. This guy actually gave you a second chance and you still repeated the the "abuse". Face up to the fact that you are not getting dumped but cutting your nose off to spite your face and maybe you can turn this bad habit off. Otherwise you are going to get a reputation for being and emotional train wreck and no one worth having will bother with you. Sound harsh? You want pity or the truth? Time to grow up and act like an adult.

I'm in Albert LEa -- the town of NOTHING. Moved here ot run away form everything and start over but yet transfer with my job. I found out about a lot of things because I had the wonderful oppertunity (yes this is being sarcastic)to have a job were his exsleeping partner-coworker..etc... also worked and a year of hell is what I call it went on but I needed the benefits I could retain wiht this job. I moved away from all my familiarity to start a life over -- with him and luckily my daughter and the baby came with me.
Now I'm stuck here away form my other kids, away from anything I know -- no zoo's, volunteering for anything animals is nil -- not even a bird habitat here! Not even an area that plays good music to go out to dance! the basement isn't doen yet for me to get started wiht the work shop area so I can't do that either yet and it is soaked down there with all this rain again YIKES!
Tomorrow i have off and hope the rain subsides as I will be going ot watch a friends kids football game -- 9th grader --- sure miss watching kids that age play!!
I'm a tad better this morning -- at least no tears have fallen yet and even writing this i can keep them subsided.

Thanks everyone. I know I'm a strong person in here some where! With all I've been through this should be a walk in the park -- just the norm of "he was suppose to be SO different" UHG I being so gullable!! He was differnt in how he presented himself -- just ended up being the same that I seem to attract deep inside.

just keep the prayers coming cause I gave him everything -- including living my the security of all my familiarity and what I knew.

Bj