Topic: Women should be paid to get married.
messi_is_a_tim_1888's photo
Mon 04/27/15 04:05 PM

Ohhh..foxs.. has you wrapped around his little finger doesn't he..lmao..:tongue: tongue2
She's in a Fox box, no1? ha ha

no photo
Mon 04/27/15 04:07 PM

yes something that will match what you contribute.. or at least come close..... most definitely pat yourself on the back.. you seem like a good mom.. and you where probably a very good wife...flowerforyou


I skipped being a wife and became a mom because it's more probable I would be a good mom than a good wife, because babies are all good but men, you never know most of them. As they say men will come and go.

no1phD's photo
Mon 04/27/15 04:08 PM
well apparently one of them did with you..lol.. I'm just kidding... seriously.
..drinker

no photo
Mon 04/27/15 04:08 PM

Being a mother is no longer an excuse not to work . Sure perhaps when the child is young I can understand the desire to stay home but once they reach school age there is nothing stopping mums from working . .. Even if it is part-time . Perhaps when you start earning your own money estelle you will understand the value of what men do for the family and appreciate those efforts :-)


Why do you think you know if I work, worked or will work?

no photo
Mon 04/27/15 04:10 PM

well apparently one of them did with you..lol.. I'm just kidding... seriously.
..drinker


He's actually asleep in his room, he is still around. Apparently he just got a job at a shipyard 4 days a month.

no photo
Mon 04/27/15 04:11 PM
http://www.allaboutturkey.com/marriage.htm

Traditionally, marriage had been, and frequently continues to be, a contract negotiated and executed by the betrotheds' families and blessed by a representative of the religious establishment. Representatives of the bride negotiated the contract with those of the groom, stipulating such terms as the size and nature of the bride-price paid by the groom's family to the bride's, and certain conditions of conjugal life. After a series of meetings between the two families, the exchange of gifts, and the display of the trousseau, the marriage was formalized at a ceremony presided over by a religious official. The ritual left no doubt that the consenting units were families rather than individuals. In like manner, the relations of the young couple were a family matter.

Estelle, this is in YOUR country.

and yes, Couples in Turkey do get paid for marriage. This had been pointed out by Fox some time ago in another thread.

Turkey - Financial Incentive for Couples to Marry Young




no1phD's photo
Mon 04/27/15 04:12 PM
Ohhh... so glad you have a sense of humor.. I thought you were going to tear me a new one..lol...ohh.. so you are common law..oui.?

HeadnHeart's photo
Mon 04/27/15 04:14 PM

In many cultures a woman's parents were paid to seal the marriage deal, shouldn't women be paid today for this marriage deal?


Let's Just add an E and Make it FEEMALE? ....

So you want it, coming and going? laugh laugh

no1phD's photo
Mon 04/27/15 04:15 PM


Ohhh..foxs.. has you wrapped around his little finger doesn't he..lmao..:tongue: tongue2
yes he does .. Laughing .. But you know what I love my job and even if I had the choice to stay at home .. I would still choose a career . Money should not define a relationship and any relationship that starts out about money is doomed love love
..yes.. I agree with you.. both people need to work..
once the children are old enough... for obvious reasons..
self worth.. the social aspect of it.... extra income... give you something to talk about as well... with your spouse...

.. no one can really afford to stay at home these days..
housewifes are a thing of the past..... even if you are she makes enough money.... being part of a workforce is important..

.. so says my little red book..lol.. oh I hope that wasn't racist..surprised waving :angel:

Chazster's photo
Mon 04/27/15 04:22 PM
Edited by Chazster on Mon 04/27/15 04:22 PM




I think you got your facts all wrong...

It was woman who needed a dowry to bring to her husband on their marriage, not the other way round ....
That's why having many daughters was/is quite something... if you want to find them all a good husband, you need a good dowry for them.

Saw this docu on a Indian family few years back, reasonably poor family with I believe 3 or 4 daughters. The father's life was consumed by making enough money for his daughters' dowry. It was all he was doing, day in day out, year in year out. And he seemed to not mind, loved it, loved his daughters and working his butt of to give them what they needed in the end.
But what a way to live.
.
.




Grrrrrr...
It pains me to do this, more than anyone will ever know
But, Estelle was at least partially correct.

There were native american cultures,
where it was customary for a man
to barter with a woman's parents,
in exchange for the woman.



While you may find instances of that they are the minority. It was much more often that the women's family paid the men. Which is what we originally told her and she is trying to claim it isn't the case. The true title of the thread should be if women should pay men to get married.


You did notice the lack of the word "all", in my post?
Correct?

You did notice the original argument didn't you? The some culture might do it the other way argument was addressed in the first two pages (and the post you quoted me on). She continued to argue that we were incorrect in saying most of the world the women's family paid. So no, you saying she was partially correct wouldn't be the case in the context of the argument at this point.

no photo
Mon 04/27/15 04:22 PM



Ohhh..foxs.. has you wrapped around his little finger doesn't he..lmao..:tongue: tongue2
yes he does .. Laughing .. But you know what I love my job and even if I had the choice to stay at home .. I would still choose a career . Money should not define a relationship and any relationship that starts out about money is doomed love love
..yes.. I agree with you.. both people need to work..
once the children are old enough... for obvious reasons..
self worth.. the social aspect of it.... extra income... give you something to talk about as well... with your spouse...

.. no one can really afford to stay at home these days..
housewifes are a thing of the past..... even if you are she makes enough money.... being part of a workforce is important..

.. so says my little red book..lol.. oh I hope that wasn't racist..surprised waving :angel:


Sneeze sneeze I have work allergies.

no photo
Mon 04/27/15 04:24 PM



Being a mother is no longer an excuse not to work . Sure perhaps when the child is young I can understand the desire to stay home but once they reach school age there is nothing stopping mums from working . .. Even if it is part-time . Perhaps when you start earning your own money estelle you will understand the value of what men do for the family and appreciate those efforts :-)


Why do you think you know if I work, worked or will work?
because you live in turkey lmao .. you have a young child .. And you have old fashioned views of marriage . Do you work . Have you ever worked pitchfork


Because women in Turkey don't work?

Chazster's photo
Mon 04/27/15 04:24 PM

Women should be given a percentage of her husbands earnings each paycheck that comes in, and that percent is equal to the paycheck amount. She should be in charge of how it get's spent giving him an allowance to go to work, this way it's fair.

Or you go and earn your own money.

Chazster's photo
Mon 04/27/15 04:26 PM




oh don't get me started..lol..
.. if your partner stays at home ..when you work.. then you should give them an allowance.. a monthly allotment..
to do with what they choose...


I believe that is financial abuse. The wife should get the check.
.. well the wife does get the check..oui.... consider the allowance your paycheck then..... or do you want me to take taxes off of you...lol


No the wife should get the whole check. Then she should spend it according to what the whole family needs, not like your wife did. If the wife does that, why be with her?


And why should the wife get a check at all? I say the person earning the money make the big financial decisions regardless of gender.

no photo
Mon 04/27/15 04:28 PM




Being a mother is no longer an excuse not to work . Sure perhaps when the child is young I can understand the desire to stay home but once they reach school age there is nothing stopping mums from working . .. Even if it is part-time . Perhaps when you start earning your own money estelle you will understand the value of what men do for the family and appreciate those efforts :-)


Why do you think you know if I work, worked or will work?
because you live in turkey lmao .. you have a young child .. And you have old fashioned views of marriage . Do you work . Have you ever worked pitchfork


Because women in Turkey don't work?

http://www.wunrn.com/news/2015/02_15/02_16/021615_turkey.htm]http://www.wunrn.com/news/2015/02_15/02_16/021615_turkey.htm
Growing local outrage

The measures have sparked outrage in the country, with women organizations, labour unions and employer associations denouncing the package.

Women organizations claim the goal behind the campaign is to keep women at home, remove them from economic and social life and allow them just to bear children, charged Zülfikar Doğan, a commentator on Al Monitor.

Chazster's photo
Mon 04/27/15 04:29 PM

a savings account..slaphead ..
no offence and nothing for nothing..
but a savings account is not a very good investment.. minimal return..
.. sure low risk.. but very very slowoops growth... you should look into something that has.. did you say Turkey...ohhh.. nevermind then..lol


I will have to disagree there. It really depends on the country. My wife gets guaranteed 5% in Korea.

no1phD's photo
Mon 04/27/15 04:29 PM
Yes.. but you are busy earning the money.. you should not have to.. worry your pretty little head.. with such mundane details...
.. now why don't you go start a bubble bath for the two of us..... well I. finish.. with the budget..

. at least that's what my ex wife used to tell me....:angel:

no photo
Mon 04/27/15 04:32 PM





Being a mother is no longer an excuse not to work . Sure perhaps when the child is young I can understand the desire to stay home but once they reach school age there is nothing stopping mums from working . .. Even if it is part-time . Perhaps when you start earning your own money estelle you will understand the value of what men do for the family and appreciate those efforts :-)


Why do you think you know if I work, worked or will work?
because you live in turkey lmao .. you have a young child .. And you have old fashioned views of marriage . Do you work . Have you ever worked pitchfork


Because women in Turkey don't work?

http://www.wunrn.com/news/2015/02_15/02_16/021615_turkey.htm]http://www.wunrn.com/news/2015/02_15/02_16/021615_turkey.htm
Growing local outrage

The measures have sparked outrage in the country, with women organizations, labour unions and employer associations denouncing the package.

Women organizations claim the goal behind the campaign is to keep women at home, remove them from economic and social life and allow them just to bear children, charged Zülfikar Doğan, a commentator on Al Monitor.



Everywhere you go in Turkey women work, banks, grocery stores, government offices, policemen, teachers, lawyers, prime ministers even, so go do some more research.

no photo
Mon 04/27/15 04:42 PM

Women should be given a percentage of her husbands earnings each paycheck that comes in, and that percent is equal to the paycheck amount. She should be in charge of how it get's spent giving him an allowance to go to work, this way it's fair.


yes boss... your right boss.. can I now have my allowance to go to work.... I did see a pastry that looked good at a shop I go by.. can I have $2.00 extra boss..to buy one... just this one time.. please???

how may I serve you before I head out the door boss

no photo
Mon 04/27/15 04:46 PM
My ex husband blindsided me with divorce papers. He did not discuss with me ahead at all. I did not get 1 penney in the divorce. I could have gone to a lawyer and gotten something, but for me, it was not worth it. I don't want anything from him. I don't hate men from that experience. I'm dating and treat every man as an equal to me.