.. what are some of the biggest challenges you have faced...
in..going it alone so to speak..
... is it the financial burden!
. perhaps raising the children on your own.!..

.. or is it as simple as.. having to go out on the town by yourself.....

.. telling yourself it's okay that you're alone.... lots of people have dinner by themselves...lol..

.. going to see a movie by yourself however... is a bit tricky..lol..


.. how do you cope with being alone..
..

. I have gone out by myself.. To.. local pubs and night spots... just to end up alone at the end the night.... wondering what's the matter with me.... I now know it's all about...
.. making the first move... putting yourself out there..

.. but sometimes even doing the simple shopping.. are going to the local mall..... I feel a bit of anxiety..
over the fact that I am doing this alone.... don't get me wrong I enjoy being alone.....
. just curious on how some of you cope and if you can relate... .....

.... what do you tell yourself to make yourself feel better about the situation.....


.

If you truly are comfortable with your own company, and enjoy being alone, there is no situation that needs coping with.

yes. ..being comfortable with yourself.
and the solitude of being alone.
. is good place to be..
but most of us if not all of us..
have had those moments where we think.. geez it would be nice to have somebody to share this moment with....
.. or I wish I had somebody.. to talk with....


.. Or just go and do something with..

.... I realize this is a bit of a pointed. topic... one that is not easy to answer..
.. without truly exploring the heart of the matter..... why am i alone..
Ok.. why are you alone..lol

.

you just said it perfectly no1, not afraid of being alone, sometimes it actually suits me, but... there are moments when I would like somebody to be with me, to share things together... joy, laugh or just silence... it would be nice

Got me thinking :-)

The only time in my entire life when I craved another's company..
a moonlit, night-time cruise down the Thames, there were a LOT of
couples, and I remember thinking, well, isn't this the one time
it would have been really nice to share, with someone special.

To savor the memory, talk of later in life.
Alas..
All I have is you people.

Who's a silly Irish man? I am. Genuinely thought the date was June 12th. It took a bit to long for it to register correctly.

I�m just new here but

I don't know if its because I'm always around so many people all the time or if I have just closed myself off so much to the idea of getting involved too seriously in a relationship but I find I prefer to do things alone...I never have to worry that what I want to do will be boring to anyone else...I can drive anywhere as fast or slow as I want..can stay as late or leave as early as I choose..no worries about upsetting someone cause I am not focusing totally on them...I am very social and love wandering about talking to everyone...when I'm sad I like to be alone...don't have to worry about anyone but me...hmmmm...but I suppose I sometimes I miss just the warmth and gentle breathing of snuggling with someone I truly care for..yeah...that gets to me once in awhile..but all in all,... Me, myself, and I seem to enjoy life just fine...hugs to all the lonely people though...

it's funny that you mention that..
the opposite of .. wanting someone..
.. the need..to not have someone..
around..... I suppose you get so used to your own company.... making decisions that only affect you....
.. that when you do have somebody with you.... at least for me! sometimes I wish they were not there... like if I go have lunch with a friend.. and then after lunch they want to hang out for a while.... I make an excuse for why I don't want them to hang out with me.... just so I can do what I want to do... if I want to go somewhere I don't want to know if it's okay with the other person... if they would like to come along... if it interests them or not... I never have this conversation with myself...lol..
.. if I want to go do something, I go do it.... it is a hard balancing act..
having someone when you want them..... and then not having them when you don't want them...
.. does that make a person selfish..?.
. does it make you hard in some way..
..?.. somewhat unsociable..hmm
.


.

I am an introvert. It is best thing about me yet my biggest downfall. I love being self-sufficient, and the indepence I recieve from not being tethered by the need to take a companion with me everywhere is a lovely perk. However, my introverted nature limits me. I don't go out of my way to make friends or find guys. While I do enjoy being sociable for short periods of time, the biggest part of my personality is my need to be alone to "recharge." Does that mean I don't want to find someone to spend the rest of my life with? Not necessarily. But, in response to your thought provoking post, being alone has taught me more about myself than any amount of time I have spent trying to fit in with a crowd of people.

For me; I am fine doing things alone. About the only challenge is when I have a job or chore that requires a second pair of hands. For instance trying to put together furniture; or say carrying something that is long in length up or down my steps. Never have much time to be lonely as I am very involved with my community which keeps me very busy.

.hmm.. I could do so much with your reply..lol.. but I will behave myself.... yes you are correct.. an extra pair of hands would be nice...
..hmm.. trying very hard to keep this topic clean..lol... not only for the. points, you pointed out... but bringing all the groceries in by yourself ,really sucks.!..

.

The time its scary is when you are injured and can hardly get by without help. I've been there more than once and just lately! It infurrirates me to be crippled after everything else i've been through! I know its partially permanent now, but still an eyeopener for the future! Luckily i believe in my training and 2 words pop up everytime! (Adapt-overcome) working for now!!

.. well I tried to make the topic ,as intelligent as I could for you.. ....

I was injured in a very serious accident. I had a hard time moving and could barely walk. I had to shovel my side walk by getting on my knees and pushing the snow away. I couldn't vacuum the floor for more than a few minutes at a time. I still went to work and suffered through pain. I had trouble even buying groceries but I pushed through it all on my own.

My feeling is this.
If you love someone, all the way, their happiness
is more important than your own.
So, you adapt in all the small ways that do not
alter who you are.

They want space, you give it.
They want time, enjoy your own.

It is hardly even compromise if you do it for the
joy of making them happy.

You behave yourself. I don't mind brining in the groceries by myself but really; I don't normally do a large grocery shopping as I only have to buy food for one.

I did not realize you live where you live...hmm.. well if you ever need a hand with anything. .. including bringing in your groceries...lol.. just let me know.. how's the weather down there..lol..

I just want soomeone around to kill spiders!

For me, it was taking on the burden of absolutely everything on my own. Worrying about that bill that was coming due, how I was going to get the washer/dryer,...whatever, fixed when it broke, getting the mower blades sharpened, mowing the grass, taxes, and doing all the daily chores, what if the furnace, water heater....goes out, and on and on. On the other side of that I have always needed time alone, I think we all do. I liked my space. Liked that my time was my own. Some days it was so nice to know I was going home to just my girl, Maggie, my dog, and no one else.

Fortunately, I found someone who also needs his space and time alone, his independent activities and hobbies. He's happy to make the decisions about repairs and help with daily chores, and we share the finances, and he kills the spiders! Niether of us feels we need to be joined at the hip and share everything in common. It's a balance that kind works its self out over time. Knowing there is someone to lean on is the most amazing feeling and I cherish it, more now that I have experienced not having that.

Oh; I didn't know you were just 3 hours away from me. The weather is great but it was a little slushy today for work; but still managed to catch lots of speeders. I will let you know the next time I grocery shop or need a set of hands to help lift something.