I agree with everyones decision to not see him at this time. If there is this much drama before you leave, I can only imagine what it will be like once you get there. I want to see you succeed. Nobody knows who will end up with who in the end, but it's obvious that the current combination of couples is not working for anyone. So watch yourself

thank you guys so much for the help..... i really have had a change a heart on this situation the advice is great thanks agaiin so much

you're more than welcome
please take care
and please stay safe!

thanks heart i will
as far as getting a protection order i was going to hes in indiana and he has to sign it in order for it to take affect if he dosent then im screwed and he that would just put him over the top and hed probably have people looking for me... ive seriously considered changing my name and such because im afarid of what hell do when i tell him i dont want to be with him

do whatever you have to to stay safe
change your number, address, move if that's possible
the only thing about an order, is getting them served, and then they do know where you live
yes, for those that wonder I am speaking from experience

the order doens't do much, at least her in MO
2 women got them and both were killed before they reached home
here you have to go to court with the person you want the order on

life is so messed up!

Power and control come in many forms...this man has used abuse as a power, and to control, fuelling off your fears.

You left him once and survived...do not allow your fears to take hold now.

You left him once...remind yourself of that.

Change your phone number yes, and get a roomate in if you can...make the police in your area, or relevant authorities, aware of previous circumstances, in the unlikely event he does try to physically threaten you, either by him, or through another, and then get on with your life.

Learn from your past, heal from the past, and move forward.

thanks jess for the kind words i remind myself everyday and then ask myself if it was a mistake messed up way of thinking

No sweetie, it wasn't a mistake that you left. It was the only decision in this case. You got out with your life, and it sounds like your brain came with ya too so be grateful. I was with a guy who started with words to control and when that didn't work he started hitting. Once he hit me... he got a huge candle upside the head, then my fist and I was outta there. You deserve a man who will treat you like a princess. NO man should EVER hit a woman, and if he does hes NOT A MAN! I put up with a lot when it comes to relationships, but hitting is not something I can or will tolerate. Don't let my sister's death be in vain. I am going to send you to my personal website: www.jaymestephens.8m.com, click on the page that says "This will always be Cassie's page" and read my first hand experience with her death. I pray that it helps you know for sure that you will never go back to that.

In about 20 years, so let him go now. You should never submit to abuse! I most my years of living, what I see is "once an abuser, always an abuser"!!

Run like hell!!!

In about 20 years, so let him go now. You should never submit to abuse! I most my years of living, what I see is "once an abuser, always an abuser"!!

Run like hell!!!

please go back and read your post
it says just like he used to
enough said

Girlychic, if a change is going to be made I pray YOU make the change and stay the hell away from that guy. He doesn't deserve you and you deserve so much more.

Hey girlychic! Were on our way to michigan. We got a full size van with no license plates and completely blacked out windows. We call it "the punisher." its for mean, abusive guys who enjoy beating women. See how he likes a 4500 pound van with no plates and blacked out windows hitting him. "Thunk!" stay away from him. He's roadkill.

Girlychic!!!!
You need to tell that peace-o-sh!t to get to steppin!!!!
You change your number and tell him you never wanna hear from him agian!!!
Anytime i hear of some dude hittin a babygirl.
I just wanna kick his ass off the F!CKIN PLANET!!!
Sorry

Nice to see you back,we have talked and I know from experience they don't change,your a young beautiful girl who deserves better.I care about you and my thoughts are run and don't look back.

Don't go back & don't talk to him. gurl I just got sick reading that please what ever you do dont fall for it he has bad plans for you. I'm sorry to say.

can you really change someday?
for God's sake if he beat you once he will beat you again, that is for sure.
and then he calls and start talking sweet, and boom u fall.
gosh. once it's enough to learn that some people are mean, and they don't change.

Girly...

I don't know, if he has changed as you say he has...why did he blow up at you on the phone. It doesn't sound like he changed at all to me. You've already been abused by him, isn't it enough. NO one deserves abuse...physical, verbal...or otherwise. I would NOT go back to him...just my 2 cents

never go back to someone who has abused you. check the statistics, talk to a professional. you may need support to avoid further devastating abuse.