Who hates Them?

Hate is a harsh word everyone needs some love sometimes..

Have you ever exchanged emails with someone you met through an internet dating site, just to wonder if its the same person who is replying to your messages each time? Or perhaps you've briefly thought to yourself that the person on the other end of the communication really needs to employ a spell-checker.

Neither of these email discrepancies are cause for alarm; a lot of people aren't very good with spelling and grammar, and they may be writing English as a second language. But if more than one of the following email discrepancies pop up during the course of your communications, it may be an internet dating scam.
•Communication is vague, difficult to understand or is repeated.
•Immediate (within 15 minutes) responses are received every time you send a message, with no discussion beforehand as to when you'll be online.
•Email messages change in tone, language, style or grammar throughout the communication. This could evolve over time, or it could be apparent in just one email.
•A sob story is shared early on that changes quickly from an annoyance into an emergency - and only you can help.

It can be very heady to have an ongoing email chat with someone who is focused entirely on you. In fact, this is a great sign that the person on the other end of the conversation is truly interested and invested in learning more about who you are.

Where the danger lies however, is not their interest in you as a person, but rather that they don't offer any detailed, personal information about themselves in return, or doesn't really answer your emails in a personal manner, but rather changes the topic with each contact.

Appropriate responses are integral to determining whether or not the relationship you are creating is based in reality and not a potential internet dating scam. Could the person emailing you be merely copying and pasting responses from a pre-determined outline or script, or do their emails really seem to "get" you and offer some sort of individualized attention?

Most singles who have tried meeting people from online dating sites have come across this telltale internet dating scam sign: being asked to either cash someone's check or money order for them, or being asked outright for money. The story varies somewhat with each internet dating scam, but the intention remains the same: robbing you of your hard earned cash.

Although cliche, the saying holds true for internet dating scams: if the person's photo looks too good to be true, that's because it probably is.

Of course models, actors and other extremely attractive people want to find love too, and you may very well have lucked out in the attractiveness category with the person you are communicating with online.

Look closely at emails they send you. The scammer will send you an email which is full of inconsistencies, often getting their own name or your name wrong. It will be badly written and repeat itself. Watch for these other signs: •Their command of your language deteriorates with time.
•They make mistakes, in that their "story" begins to contradict itself here and there.
•They mention things that seem entirely unrelated to the profile they've built up of themselves, or that seem too revealing and even unbelievable.

Talk. Phone conversations can often unravel a fake. When you hear this person on the phone, note whether they have a slight accent and use awkward phrases; if their accent does not match their supposed origin, be suspicious. Ask them probing questions and trust your gut instinct about the validity of the replies. •If phoning, beware a cell phone number that does not match the area in which they claim to live. This often means that the person is not in the same country at all. Match the cell phone number and the area code with the state or province they claim to live in.
•If you spot a number discrepancy, beware excuses. They may tell you they've just moved or didn't bother to change it when they did because it would be too hard to contact all their friends with a new number

Be suspicious of rapid escalation. If the person suggests that the communication switch to phone calls and texting asap, be alarmed. Then, if the phone calls and texting rapidly escalate in expressions of love and passion, and within a matter of 5 to 6 weeks they tell you that they have fallen in love, be very alarmed. •Over-the-top expressions of feelings for you even though you haven't met are a warning sign.

Watch out for the catch. When they think they have you on their hook, this is when they reel you in. They will tell you they are on their way home to be with you to start a new life together. But then out of the blue they will say they have a financial emergency. They will ask for money to be sent to them immediately to get them out of a fix. If you do not send them money or insist on safeguards in the sending of any, they will pull out the trust card, saying: Where there is no trust, there can be no relationship. Take that as your cue to walk away for good. •Think about why it is that this person has all the time in the world to text or email you but cannot manage to meet you in person. That's a telling sign of the faker.

It all comes with the territory if your dating/meeting others from online you have to use your common sense and muddle though all the bs to find those that are real....


The Red Flags are there one can either choose to see them or ignore them... Those that ignore them get sucked into the games they play...

Thank you for your story, you will be notified of your prize shipment by one of our charming operators.

Well now you know and can watch out and be more careful. Hopefully you didn't send money. Good luck

I'd suggest when yer done playin with'em.. REPORT and BLOCK are the best actions.. there are plenty more on this site and others.. it's THEIR 9-5 so ta speak.. like TXS said.. there are a TON of red flags if you want to see'em.. and as PKH said, do NOT send any money
I'm at the point I can spot'em comin a mile off.. however meeting people on the forums is, I feel, the BEST way to get to know a real person.. good luck in your pursuits!

I know all too well, not to get suckered in by those kind of men, that give me their phone number too soon. Why anyone would give a stranger money is beyond me. They really feel sorry for them that badly? Wow. .

I could never hate someone that teaches me a lesson about self protection even if they are scammers and liars.



Most certainly. Changes in the style of communication can be subtle but very detectable to a seasoned eye and ear. Once we are aware of the differences we can adjust our own responses as well.



Not if you yourself also enjoy the sport of catch and release.



Thank you Knight, you seem to have all the answers. One would think you wrote the text book.

Nice one there. You have their trails at hand. This will help many unsuspecting victims.

Hello
I'm Portuguese and my English is not good and far from perfect. It means I can be easily identified as a scammer when I'm not. Every time I ask people here to chat with me on skype they refuse but it's ok if we chat on messenger, yahoo and so on.... I decided to not wast my time with people that refuse to chat facing a camera (skype).

it's natural to refuse someone that immediately wants to chat on yahoo, msn or skype.. those are often indications of a scammer.. myself I report & block people offering those suggestions right off the bat.. I'd suggest getting to know someone first beFORE trying to drag them outta the site, it's FREE to email AND chat here so WHY go elsewhere where the possibility of being scammed is much greater..??

in time, once someone knows you better, you CAN suggest a 'face to face' on skype.. but to initialize a conversation that way?? nope.. I'd block you too! just sayin..