My wife has no physical interest in me and never wants to have sex. She says that I need to try to turn her on and be romantic. I can't think of what I can do to turn her on.

What has worked well for you in the past?

marriage counselling. get her in to it to sort out why she married you and if she actually wants to stay married to you. Best that you get to know the answers without fighting in order to sort through them one way or the other or this will destroy you both if it's not talked through with a professional to keep things under control.

Meanwhile, I would suggest you give up even thinking about sex. Just enjoy company and good times with her. Do nice things for her and take her out for dinner, buy her flowers. Tell her how much you love her and tell her why... without wanting a sexual "reward". Forget sex for a while until you learn some communication and really, please go to a good counselor together. A marriage without sex can't survive but there is no way you can expect her to give it when she feels cold about it. You have to find out why together... she may not even know herself.

could it be magic by barry manilow

Go rent a motel , put flower petal s on the bed and foor then a bundle of roses on the bed end ,place candles everywhere ,then bring her surprise her , later on run her a bubble bath with flower pedals in it and candlelights only , place a towel on the side of the tub pour her a nice glass of wine , tell her to take as long as she wants , put on some nice romantic music ext , hope that helps some..worked for me

1 tell her what is great about her.... find something.
2 bring her flowers, .... i give single roses
3 keep compliment her during the day.
4 try to stand close ... pretend you are trying to access something near her and touch her gently somewhere, like slowly rub you hand down her arm lightly
5 while touching whisper something sweet in her ear, a compliment or I LOVE YOU.
6 invite her to talk to you in bed,
7 message her gently and slowly

for romance it is a lot of work, iys not easy. when you first met you didnt remember what you did, then it wasnt work. we all change

Evaluate yourself honestly. Do you pay attention to her or are you busy with work, books, phone, computer, friends, hobbies etc. Is she your priority in your life? Does she feel it? Do you dress in the lounge wear that is old? Maybe buy something nice new. Buy your wife a new nightie with a card with some message.. saw this and knew you would make it just beautiful. Tell her to pack a bag for the weekend. Plan a weekend away but don't tell her where. Take her someplace where its private unplug phones computers tv etc. and just spend time together. Play music slow dance tell her the value she has in your life. Massage by a roaring fire. Get up make her breakfast in bed. Show her how much you love her! Steam up the bathroom when you shower write on the mirror a message she will see when she showers. Slip handwritten messages someplace she will find them randomly. Cut out a big heart with paper put collage of photos on it. Hide it in the dirty laundry so she finds it while doing a mundane chore.

Everyone feels undervalued for the daily things they do. We could all use some positive feedback. Appreciation goes a long way when you know someone notices and cares about you.

I agree marriage counseling 1st off..

But, What I always found romantic, is EVERYDAY sweetness.
Rub her back.. Just because...not wanting anything in return.
Get her Roses, and tell her they were so beautiful and immediately you thought of her!

Nexaddo, you have been given some awesome ideas here. Being romantic has nothing to do with sex. It is paying attention to the little things. Doing little things for her without being asked. Doing things to save her some time. Doing things without expecting a reward.

Sooooo...... what are you doing on a dating site?

Walk up behind her and gently put your arms around her waist. Pull her back softly leaning into you and tilt her head up so you can kiss her earlobe and neck with teasing nibbles. Whisper I love you. Then let her go and walk off unless she makes you stay.

Talk to her.
Then, listen to her.
LISTEN.

A lot of young gals pigeon-hole their mate
thinking everything they do has to do with
getting sex.

If you talk to her, and really listen to her
yabbering, she will feel better about herself
and not feel so oppressed.

ohkay bro, lots of people on here giving you advice on what you can do. since there are two sides to every coin, she, as your wife, can do some things for you as well. you both took a vow as man and wife so you both should have oars in the water

besides counselling and all the stuff you can do, maybe some roll playing would help. maybe some alcohol or another drug of her choice. still these things would also involve you listening to her and agreeing to try what she is comfortable with.

try some sex panther cologne, i here that 60% of the time it works everytime


i don't recommend cheating or involving another person in your relationship. sorry to say this, but for some people in situations like yours d-i-v-o-r-c-e is an option. i guarantee i guarantee that the only sure way of getting your way is a chloroform handkerchief


(bulldog double guarantee - patent pending)
*warning: use of chloroform handkerchief not recommended on days that end in a "y"

Unfortunately she doesn't want to go to counseling. I've brought up the idea before bit she doesn't want to talk to a third party.

Communication, make sure you listen to her just like you did in the beginning.Be nice everyday and don't expect sex as a reward.Call her up in the middle of the day just to say I love you and I can't wait to be with you.

So in short she's telling you to step up your game. Spice it up. Grab her by the hand take her out for a night on the town. Just concentrate on having a really good time with her. Wine her and dine her. Flirt with her and make her feel like shes in a fairytale.

When a woman wants romance it means you need to sweep her off her feet. Especially after you're married. If you're married and she says that it means date night is coming up and you better make it faulking awesome and spontaneous. I suggest pulling out all the stops too.

Then she's married you to escape something or for mone. If she won't go to counselling and doesn't want you for sex, she's not interested in love with you and there's no marriage that will last. It can't last. Or... Has she been raped adjourned frigid? Just a thought.

Sex is in the mind, not the body. You need to change the way she thinks and feels by redirecting her attention to what she thinks is "hot". This concept is a little different for everyone so you need to take the time and effort to learn your mate.

Talk is always the way to start. Try to remember what drew her to you in the first place... telling her she is beautiful? ... telling her her how much you appreciate her as you gently run your hand across her hips?

What works for others may not work for her. Once you learn what talk turns her on, move to what touch turns her on. Past that point, she is yours.

ALWAYS make sure she has an orgasm. It leaves a good memory.

a couple of typos there from my phone. mone = money, adjourned = and turned.