You're welcome.

I actually think your profile is to long...men won't take the time to read it. I actually don't think you sound to out spoken, you like what you like and you just let it be known how you are.
I do think you need to make it shorter and then add what you are looking for in a man? This is just my opinion and that way maybe you will get more hits on your profile?
Good luck and it does take time for people to get to know you and TRUST you on here!!

thank you unsure!!

Randomideas, all the things you come up with to not go for online dating, apply to real life too! And yes, you can go back to avoiding etc, but ... does that truly make you happy? There was a reason for you signing up here, why give up so easily?
Strong women don't give up, just go for it! We all had to work on our profiles and profile texts. It's not something we were taught at school or by our parents. It's trial and error, for all of us!

What I gather from your last posting, is that you've been hurt and now are in shields-up mode. And it's okay to be cautious, after all we've all had our fair share of **** in life. But it would be a shame to let bad stuff from the past define you in the here and now and to let it shape your future.

How do you rephrase "no prejudiced people"? Not so difficult, go for the direct opposite of your negatives, for example "open minded people".

A couple more:
--> If you dont live in my vicinity=it just isnt practical=to hard to negotiate and plan anything of any value.
--> For practical reason I'm looking for someone in my area.
(something like that). Doesn't sound nearly as harsh, conveys the same message).


--> PLEASE DON"T CONTACT ME IF YOU ARE MERELY SEPARATED= finish what you have to do get on with your life .. before you put a profile on a dating page.
--> I'm looking for someone who's come to terms with his past and is ready to make a new start.

Or something like that. It's not all that difficult, you just got to think positive, think in solutions, not in problems!
NOthing wrong with deal-breakers, I got plenty of those too, hihi. Just phrase them in a friendlier way.

I totally get what you say about having lost yourself in a relationship. Been there too, got sucked in by a narcissist. But I learned my lesson, got a lot stronger and the way I feel is: NO WAY will I let that bad experience define the rest of my life! I want to be able to open my heart again, in spite of what happened. And yes, I'm also very cautious, but also aware there's only one person who can create the right perimeters for love, and that's me!
The only one who can prevent you losing yourself in a relationship is ... you! Becoming overly defensive is not going to stop that. Dare to step over that threshold of fear, dare to give yourself a shot at happiness and love! Open up a little bit so if that one special person comes along, he can see your light, feel attracted to it and approach you.
And you got a light, your an artist. And that 2nd picture clearly shows what a warm-hearted person you are. Don't deny yourself happiness! You're worth it, you just gotta believe it yourself.

Sorry for writing such a tome, but there's something about you that makes me want to reach out

I'm one of those rare guys that do actually read the text on profiles and I would say that it's too long. You really don't need to bombard people with that much information before you have even said hello.

Personally, it doesn't say "strong woman" to me. It just says independent and not seriously looking to meet anybody. Well, guess what? This site is full of women like that and you aren't unique.

I'll just tell you what I would tell anyone with a TL;DR profile. Concentrate on getting your personality across and if you do have a sense of humour try to put a bit of that into it. Don't kid yourself that saying that you don't want sex talk or people that don't measure up to your standards of political correctness etc is going to stop anything and just basically edit that whole blurb and delete anything that makes it tedious to read.

Also, you are making a lot of generalisations about dating and men on dating sites based on what?

thank you crystal fairy!!! you really DID put the ideas ina softer way..
very constructive..
just thinking more now.. about all of this.. and realizing lots of things.. its very dificult for people to connect in any way... and itsd even worse ina way here. because .. of text is just flat.. no one sees facial expressions.. or realizes what is behind the things a person says... in real life.. im caring and compassionate.. but had that used against me.. but ..i will STILL care..
thanks again.

you said:
I'll just tell you what I would tell anyone with a TL;DR profile.

not sure what that means?

hahaha whats funny to me.. is that its the LADIES here that have given me the most constructive feedback!!!! i thank you. i know its will take me awhile to re do somethings onthe profile and im so bogged down til Saturday.. im going nuts haha got a gig friday night.. and need to restring and clean up 2 guitars=and write setlists/=cause all i have left are band things and no solo lists !!!! AAARRRGGHHH...
haha i shoulda stayed semi retired..
music is a jealous lover....peace to all

TL;DR means Too Long Don't Read.

Good luck RandomIdeas and have a good gig!
Been in a relationship with a musician, done some gig-organizing myself, so I kinda know the drill of having to sort out set-lists and stuff.
I usually make the set-list for a 3 hour, annual gig: one band, but some 17 different singers, some good, some crap, lol. Having to alternate between good, mediocre and crap singers, upbeat and slow songs etc and of course also think about the effort the band has to put in, so it's not all hard work and then endless boring stuff. Well, you know the drill.
I always find it a challenge to do. I like it! Apart from organizing, I'm also the MC, one of the lead singers and backing vocals.
If I could make a living doing that kind of stuff, I'd be a very very happy girl!
Enjoy it ( I envy you, hihi)

If/when you re-do your profile, just ask for rating again :) And do it, girl! It's worth it. I actually learnt a lot about myself by writing my profile text, editing it time and again. You really have to think about who you are, what you like and want etc. without writing a tome.
Ppl that have been married for 20, 30 odd years never have to think about these things, lol. But it does give you more insight in yourself, which is nice :)

I would guess that if you aren't getting any responses the main problem is probably just your age and I've said the same thing to men your age that asked that question here. Mingle is not a particularly good site for meeting local people, so what happens is that they direct you to the forums where you are unlikely to meet any local people.

Stay on Mingle by all means if you like it but if you are on here for dating or a relationship you should be prepared for it to take a long time and the pickier you are, the less chance you have of meeting anybody.

Hi Randomideas. Perfect! Describes you to a T! If you think a lot of guys lack communication skills, you should see all the lovely, demure one-liners I have gotten over the years. If you arent getting any replies, it is probably that not many folks are looking for grumpy looking women who cant smile. Oh well....To quote Popeye, "I ams who I ams." Hope you had fun posting here.

hahaha to the snoozer.. i have to say i read YOUR profile and .. gee its obvious.. why YOu were never married.. and you come acorssas thinking you are really hot **** ona popsicle stick. and my pics werent taken for here.. cause being involved with someone ..isnt REALLY= as i realized .. nmy biggest.priority and whyt are YOU here ..it looks like, you are already involved with someone.. YOURSELF. oh.. and by the way most of us who DId live thru the hippie tiomes.. dont usually "dig' the long hair effect on an old guy.. it makes you seem backward thinking instead of foward thinking,
Cut me i cut thee.
dont smoke an wooden nickels stony...

Hi Random. I know you are mad at me, I wasnt trying to be mean to you. I apologize. I was trying to give you some constructive feedback. Anyways, I thank you for reviewing my profile. I would have to agree with you of your astute observation about me never getting married. I have had a hard time about being committed to a marital institution for 30 years of hard labor. I'm going to be a divorce lawyer in my next life, lol. Thank you for letting me know that my long hair does not work for me. I like it because it helps me screen out all the conservative ladies looking for a clean-cut working slave. Which as you mention, are most of them, I guess. Hugs

Ur hot momma very sexy