other than dumb typos which im fixing gradually.. why am i not getting any responses...seriously= opening it up to all male or female to respond.. just curious.. im perplexed also .by men..whio say absolutley NOTHING about themselves ..and say I want a woman"
like shes just gonna pop right up and jump in his life without knowing anything about him! whats up with that?

Hya, men do seem to have a nack of saying very little, its not just you and its not just on this site.

Many only put a couple of lines and it says more about what they want than who they are.

As for women I think mainly women come on here for male relationships, not really for friendships. I think you are more likely to make friends on face book.

Lauren in New Zealand

randomideas,,,,,,ok you asked,,,,i will will do the best I can,,,,,,,,,first i saw your picture,,,,,i saw a attractive woman,,,,,then i went to your profile,,,,it got better i saw more pictures of the attract woman,,,i see she has a puppy aw animal lover ok thats a plus,,,,,,,,,then i read your profile...........you came on very strong,,,,men are for most part direct, women are usually indirect,,,,,did i save your to direct,,?yes i did......you scared me.!!!! and i am not scarred of nothing.!! men are for the most are part looking for a soft spot in there life...and soft spot to land.....not more problems......the most beautiful part of a person is there natural child inside us.........yes you have a beautiful little girl in you.....thats the part that has to connect to a man for him to love and cherish you............on u-tube there are some video's by Rori Raye,, she also has a web site........ check it out ... you...will be glad you did..........wishing you the best..

thanks for your honesty.. i have been told many years ago that i come across a strong woman.. and it scares men.. also.. one younger guy(friend of a friend) told me.that they kind of man who is also strong enough to approach me.. may be the kind of guy who will scare ME! hopeless situation!!1 and at our ages.. highly unlikely i will change....i think.. in my life this is why i have many male FRIENDS and very few female friends..i AM direct ..i dont play games or play coy.. when i see other women do that and play the "bat your eyelashes "flirting game =it sickens me.. because its a lie....im totally honest and upfront. i was raised that way. plus ..ima lead singer and bandleader for many yeras,, had toi work closely with men as EQUALS.. and.. sometimes .as their "boss"(hiring and firing if necessary)
agin .. i thank and applaqud you for your honesty.. but it sure does underline something for me.. that i should probaly reconcile myself to being alone.. because i will not play games and be deviouis and deceitful to have a relationship .. no way.

hi thanks for your response.,. i wasnt meaning that im looking for female friends and i guess i was ambiguous about that== i was looking ..specifically= on here (Forum) to get womens point of view on my profile..as well as what males think. im sure some women are successful and i was wondering what another woman may think of my profile .
i apreciate any feedback!

oh!!1 just another observation..about the little gilr part.. years ago i was more like that and had men tell me.. "im not looking to take care of or support anyone ..i want a strong confident woman...'
so..agin ..it DOES seem hopeless on this end.. why bother anymore.. i MUST be myself anything else is dishonest.

You've been here three days.

First thing I'd say is patience is a virtue.

hahahaha seems longer... i really end up thiunking ..its just impossible .. and Imn aLeo ! a fire sign .. patience.. gets less and less as time passes by time goes by too quickly .. to much patience..wastes time
but thanks for your response.

i DId check out one vid by Rori raye.. and things like this always come don to this observation on my part.. Realtionships.. shouldnt seem like so much work.. if it has to be such hard work ..it doesnt seem worth it.. also.. (and i WIL check out a few more of her vids) iot comes across as the same old be a girly grily flitatious type.. play games to "get".. a man.. nah!!!not .. whats the point?? try to "lure ' someone in by false pretenses? pretend to be something you arent.. gee.. if i was amn ..i donthtink iw oul;d be very hnappy ..when i founf out the woman i was dating turned out to be something other than she presented herslf to be.. haha now im bummed out again. no feeling this can ever work. its just too complicated to be a real woman, apparently

ok i will share this with you,,, first its not hopeless!!!!! there are so many options,,,, you can watch what the successful woman are doing,,, see if can find mentor to help you.....there are life coaches that work with women to get this stuff handled...they have audio cd,s, video dvd's and in person classes.... it only seem's hard at first,,,, once most people get into it they really enjoy discovering parts of themselves that they did not know before........there's a part of the child in us that adapts to get what we want....thats the part that causes us the most problems....it's called the adaptive child like throwing a fit to get what we want,,,have you not seen a adult throw a fit...and act like a child..anyway the most loving thing you can do for that little girl work on yourself.....or stay stuck and play poor me an't it awful.....love yourself thats the key for others to love us............

hahaha i love myself.. thats why i dont wanna be anyone else..and i have been single .. since 1992..dated in between but never seriously for very long .. my BS detector has about a three month auto alarm..hahaha
i just want to be cared for for who i am.. and ..there is no 'POOR Me " here =[
if it came across that way i must have been unclear.. i do alone very well and have for the last 21 years... and its actually very rare for me to even try to do this dating thing again..
i am not saying poor me.. just ..aint it a shame that we all cannot be accepterd for who we are?
and i will stay alone if i cannot be myself. cause.. im actually a pretty neat gal with alot of talent and alot to offer.. as a matter of fact im playing a gig next friday..and have things ;lined up to the end of the year...cause im a singer and a damn good one..and music is a real lifelong companion that never lies or stabs me inthe back ....
and one other thing is i dont want a man who doesnt stand on his own two feet .. im not a taxi or a bank..
and one of the things i tell other women all the time =esp. those in abusive relationships.. "you gotta love YOURSELF" so thats a given for me.

Are you contacting them and they're not replying or are you just not getting any initial emails? Are you getting any page views?

yes im getting page views and very few contats .. and the ones i get are distinctly inapproriate (separated men, people who are far away.Etc).. they must not be reading my profile at all
. i have contacted a few .. but.. i think. most men are intimidated by me. which is not what i try to project at all . i just feel like.. its best not to waste time on things that should be stated up front.. ,you know. haha FULL DISCLOSURE!
i have already had a guy be aggressive and hostil because i told him he was WAY too young for me.. ..now THAT was scary... i blocked him

I agree that your profile is probably intimidating to a lot of men, but at least you're weeding out the ones you don't want, so that's a good thing.

Thank you for responding! i was hoping i could get a woman's take on it... just out of curiosity.. and you being a younger woman and all. what could you say ,specifically ..is intimidating? ...
i have to admit.. i have intentionally .. and purposely been a loner for more of my adult life ..than having been in realtionships..im only warily .. testing the waters again...and not sure im liking it..

Honestly?
I find your profile picture not appealing. There's something creepy about it. (lighting? Colour? Fact your face is in shadow??)
I was really surprised to see your 2nd profile picture, as you look really nice! It shows your face properly and gives an impression of you.
So I'd dump the profile picture.

As for the text, nothing wrong with being a strong woman, direct and so on. I'm sort of like that too. But what you do is verbally fence ppl off. Why? You do want to be open to ppl, to a potential partner, otherwise you wouldn't be here. Right?
So be open, not defensive.

What I mean is: you write in negatives. I'm not going to do this, I am NOT like that, I will NOT do this and so on.
It's like barging into a brick wall.
Be strong, but open that wall and rephrase.

Well, you don't seem "approachable" in your profile. As CrystalFairy pointed out, all of the negatives make it seem as if you're pushing people away, maybe list what you want, instead of what you don't want; anything the opposite of what you want will be pretty clear.

Most people (especially men) aren't going to take the time to read all of your profile, they mainly look at the photos and decide if they want to contact you, so if they glance through and all they see is what you don't want and what you won't put up with, their immediate response is to go on to someone who seems more approachable. On the one hand, yeah, you're being upfront, which in theory, makes sense, but if it turns guys off, it's not very useful.

hmmmmm these last two responses are real revealing to me =and i thank you both!
the profile pic was just one i snapped fast with webcam.. and kind of wanted it to not be so identifuable .. cause its really recent.. i had no makeup on or anything.. just wanted to put on a real recent pic.. cause some folks put pics onthat are really old ..and mine are from a variety of times.
hmm. not so sure .. how.. i could be rephrasing some of the things on my profile.. for example .. how could i rephrase .. no predjudicied people..the things i write.. ARE deal breakers for me..
haha this is why iI'm alone.. and have never really been a "coupler"
it seems women are expected to put up anything and everything to "Get" a man..
im not.. i have been involved breifly inthe past.. and it seems ..i lose MYSELF. i too easily subjugate who i AM. it seemed smarter to say up front.. those things which matter deeply to me ...
i do appreciate the honesty.. particularly to see what the women think.. and it leads me to believe.. that this impulse that hits me once every four or five years to seek out a relationship is probably best ignored . and best to go back to my lone wolf status... seems too complicated to have anyone in my life..
and .. my sister keeps telling me.. the internet is no way to find someone..perhaps.. shes right..because, like the one gal (paintedcards))said..most men wont take the time to read my profile.. so.. that leads me to believe ..its all a waste of time and heartfelt sharing of my deepest thoughts..
i dont expect .. aprofile pic to draw anyone in.. im not a looker. and i know that I'm no man's dream woman.. no illusions about that. it would have to be an emotional /personality connection..and ..how can that be.. if a male wont even take a minute to read something.. years ago.. my mama told me.. the only man that would ever make me happy would be an old professor who wants to think and talk deep thoughts all the time.. she was probably right.. and they are all dead ... ll this ever does is make me want to cry .and draw deeper into reclusion and avoidance. music and my dog are the only things that seem true .

How about "looking for open-minded people?" instead of "no racists, homophobics and bigots?" That covers a lot of territory; it's inclusive and comes of as non-confrontational.

If I was looking for a guy I'd say I'm looking for a guy I can trust (instead of saying "no cheaters") and a guy who was flexible and always up for adventure (instead of saying "no one is going to change me.") See where I'm going here? Basically, you just put a "nice" spin on it; it sounds warm and fuzzy and welcoming. Guys seem to like that sort of thing.

I don't think there's anything wrong with your photos, at least you have a shirt on; I cringe whenever I encounter a profile of a guy with no shirt on.

thank you Painted cards...