Previous 1 3
Topic: 5 date rule?
pennyg281's photo
Mon 08/05/13 12:58 AM




I'm curious what your reaction would be if someone told you they had a 5 date rule. Meaning that they require that you have at least 5 dates before they would consider becoming intimate. What would your reaction be?

thomas2370's photo
Mon 08/05/13 01:12 AM
I think that at best is exceedingly shallow. Not that anyone should or shouldn't be worried about getting intimate before then. If you are worried about someone just wanting intimacy then you should be able to tell before 5 dates. If you can't, then you shouldn't just give in without knowing. Waiting 5 dates is like saying, "I will be intimate with you after you have spent X amount of money on me." If a 5 date rule is something you want for yourself then hey go for it, but you certainly do not have to tell the other party, in fact, it would probably be wise not to.

Shy_Emo_chick's photo
Mon 08/05/13 01:20 AM
I used to have a male friend in college that kept pestering me for sex. laugh "My mum won't be back till 7pm. Wanna get it on?". laugh. Pressurizing me is never a good thing. I'd tell him where to get off. Five date's is too soon for me.

pennyg281's photo
Mon 08/05/13 01:23 AM

I think that at best is exceedingly shallow. Not that anyone should or shouldn't be worried about getting intimate before then. If you are worried about someone just wanting intimacy then you should be able to tell before 5 dates. If you can't, then you shouldn't just give in without knowing. Waiting 5 dates is like saying, "I will be intimate with you after you have spent X amount of money on me." If a 5 date rule is something you want for yourself then hey go for it, but you certainly do not have to tell the other party, in fact, it would probably be wise not to.


interesting take on it . . personally 5 dates is more about getting to know the person, as far as spending money on me,I don't expect him to pay for anything for me,I have no problem paying my half or taking turns paying.

TawtStrat's photo
Mon 08/05/13 02:26 AM
I would just take it as a challenge I think.

s1owhand's photo
Mon 08/05/13 02:37 AM
No problem. You have to know someone well before you can even
become intimate. Otherwise it is just sex.

Everybody who is normal desires and enjoys sex but real intimacy
goes well beyond sex and sex without intimacy is hollow.

I think that "having a rule" is weird though. It is almost like
"well we are on the fifth date now...now what?!?!"

laugh

So my rule is - not before I feel like I know someone well
enough. That way if it feels right we can just go for it and
if it doesn't feel right then maybe later.

laugh

drinker

s1owhand's photo
Mon 08/05/13 02:37 AM
do mingle2 chat dates count?

laugh

whattheheywastaken's photo
Mon 08/05/13 04:52 AM
I would respond I have a 10 date rule, and you have to pay for the first 5 laugh

no photo
Mon 08/05/13 06:54 AM


I think that at best is exceedingly shallow. Not that anyone should or shouldn't be worried about getting intimate before then. If you are worried about someone just wanting intimacy then you should be able to tell before 5 dates. If you can't, then you shouldn't just give in without knowing. Waiting 5 dates is like saying, "I will be intimate with you after you have spent X amount of money on me." If a 5 date rule is something you want for yourself then hey go for it, but you certainly do not have to tell the other party, in fact, it would probably be wise not to.


interesting take on it . . personally 5 dates is more about getting to know the person, as far as spending money on me,I don't expect him to pay for anything for me,I have no problem paying my half or taking turns paying.


right. I was just going to ask what made him think the man would be paying for everything?

The way he answers makes it sound as though he's one of those guys who feels "entitled" to sex after having spent such and such amounts of money , or (heaven forbid) "wasted his time...." If it's a waste of time to date without sex then he is dating for the wrwong reasons. that's a little mysogynistic....but also he might not have meant it that way...lol

no photo
Mon 08/05/13 06:55 AM

Wtf is wrong with people? Why would u put up pictures of your children.? FFS! Have some common sense, do u honestly know many sick people there are in the world? Do u have ur child's permission to post their face on a fvcking dating site? U are trying to find someone for urself so why use ur kids face? Do u know how easy it is to cut the pictures from ur profile? Damn this annoys the hell out of me. What would u do if ur child gets snatched? Time to get responsible, take a damn photo of urself and post it on ur profile!!!!!!!!!

Sorry penny for posting this on ur post but a classic example of stupidity is Thomas.


take a deep breath....flowerforyou

no photo
Mon 08/05/13 06:56 AM

No problem. You have to know someone well before you can even
become intimate. Otherwise it is just sex.

Everybody who is normal desires and enjoys sex but real intimacy
goes well beyond sex and sex without intimacy is hollow.

I think that "having a rule" is weird though. It is almost like
"well we are on the fifth date now...now what?!?!"

laugh

So my rule is - not before I feel like I know someone well
enough. That way if it feels right we can just go for it and
if it doesn't feel right then maybe later.

laugh

drinker



:thumbsup: great post. totally agree.

MoonsDragonLionWolf's photo
Mon 08/05/13 07:07 AM
I'd turn the charm up 100 times over and then see if they still felt that way.
Then I'd turn the charm all the way back down.
It's dangerous to keep it up for too long.

Either way I really couldn't care less.
If you are not Luna then I have no interest.
I seek to find Luna.
A girl who shines with radiance.

Until then I'm just a lonely MoonsDragonLionWolf.

With Mountain Dew.

drinks

no photo
Mon 08/05/13 07:10 AM
5 datessurprised

1Cynderella's photo
Mon 08/05/13 07:18 AM
I cannot set a time it will take me to care for someone.

If I'm not ready to share myself sexually, it's simply not going to happen.

Any man who does not want to wait for that gift, only wants to take, and does not care enough to gain my trust to begin with.

I only want a man who gives himself to me freely and without reservations. Why would I want someone I had to coerce into having sex with me? noway slaphead


oldhippie1952's photo
Mon 08/05/13 08:45 AM





I'm curious what your reaction would be if someone told you they had a 5 date rule. Meaning that they require that you have at least 5 dates before they would consider becoming intimate. What would your reaction be?




Jo has set a six date rule before she will kiss me. I hope they go by fast!

TBRich's photo
Mon 08/05/13 08:51 AM
My rule is three dates

pennyg281's photo
Mon 08/05/13 09:06 AM

No problem. You have to know someone well before you can even
become intimate. Otherwise it is just sex.

Everybody who is normal desires and enjoys sex but real intimacy
goes well beyond sex and sex without intimacy is hollow.

I think that "having a rule" is weird though. It is almost like
"well we are on the fifth date now...now what?!?!"

laugh

So my rule is - not before I feel like I know someone well
enough. That way if it feels right we can just go for it and
if it doesn't feel right then maybe later.

laugh

drinker


flowerforyou thats a good rule.

pennyg281's photo
Mon 08/05/13 09:20 AM

I cannot set a time it will take me to care for someone.

If I'm not ready to share myself sexually, it's simply not going to happen.

Any man who does not want to wait for that gift, only wants to take, and does not care enough to gain my trust to begin with.

I only want a man who gives himself to me freely and without reservations. Why would I want someone I had to coerce into having sex with me? noway slaphead




I haven't ever used the 5 date rule, I was just curious about people take on it. I'm just really getting tired guys who think that i will have sex with someone Ive only talked to online, or expect sex the 1st time we meet. Even though I clearly tell them before had that is not what I am looking for. So I was considering telling guys that I had a 5 date rule, as a way to help the the situation, and wanted others opinions on it.




















pennyg281's photo
Mon 08/05/13 09:23 AM

I think people set time frames like that because they secretly feel that their feelings are unimportant. Anyone who received the information could either be respectful of the person they claim is of interest to them, or be stressed thinking they will be expected to perform on date #5.

I would rather not set a time frame and rely on what feels right to me as a person. On the other hand, if youre worried theyre only after sex, maybe this is a tool to get rid of them.

In other words, if you like your rule, then I like your rule too. That is how I respond.


yeah thats the way i was looking at it . . more as a tool to sort through the ones only interested in sex.

soufiehere's photo
Mon 08/05/13 09:24 AM
Edited of off-topic comments.

soufie
Site Moderator

Previous 1 3