Ok I want to know what you guys think about keeping exs or old flames as friends.
On the other side how do you feel about your partner keeping exs or old flames as friends?

why do u want to know that?

personally I would not want my man hanging around previous partners -a hello in passing is fine. That is how I manage those things and would continue so out of respect. I would not tell him what to do of course

but it would not last long with me if he spent a lot of time with previous partners

I'm not terribly close with any right now, but have had very close friendships with all of my ex boyfriends, so could hardly fault him for having a friendship with an ex girlfriend.

Divorce on the other hand is hardly something that life just got in the way of, so usually has a bigger reason for a split. A close friendship with an ex wife would surprise me.

But if there's a child involved I'd have a problem if they were not at least civil. It's not my business, but I would lose respect quickly if I heard him bashing his child's Mother. I don't care how witchy he thinks she is.

I agree. I would be suspect of too much ex bashing also...waaaaaay too much drama potential there

I would not be concerned about a distant friendship with an ex...from a polite distance...that was ongoing before we met and only if it was ongoing before we met. but once we are seeing each other as romantic partners I would expect that to naturally be curtailed. if that was a problem for him or I felt he was going to continue seeing her regularly for any reason, I would most likely end things but I would not tell him why...not a drama queen, and I wouldn't want it interpreted that I was trying to control who he could see

I simply would not stay with anyone who spent more time with an ex than was absolutely necessary - if any at all

so yes, he wuld have to choose, but I would not interfere in the choice

It has always seemed to me, since we all had lives
before we hooked up with the person, that one asks
for trouble, if they are hoping their ex's names or
stories never come up.

They were/are a part of us, they took up space in
our minds that is forever marked by the impressions
they left.

That is life..in the past.
If you hang onto anger, bitterness, vengeance..they
hurt you far more than anyone else.

Staying friendly, if you can, just seems to make
sense, healthwise.

There will be situations where it is not possible.
But I think you can do yourself a favor by giving
your past a rest.

I just thought it was a interesting topic.

I agree soufie

but that is different than actally making an effort to spend time with an ex while in a relationship with someone else

jealosy is the rage of a man,he wil not spare in the day of veangance.ex should keep his or her distance,dont spoil today with yesterday's hangovers pls

Does it seem that there is a new expectation for people to be more comfortable with exs closer in the background than maybe they use to be with texting, "social media" etc?
Were things handeled the same lets say in the 80's or the 50's with Exs? Minus the new technology of corse.

I stayed friends with my first ex-wife for many years until she died.

I have a good friendship with my ex girlfriend but I have no obligations to her and any new girlfriend would come before her. My ex is with someone else now and I'm not trying to get back with her, so I don't see why anyone would have a problem with that.

On the other hand, I've dated women that were still involved with ex partners and they weren't ready to move on. The relationship with my ex ended five years ago and although we are getting on well as friends now, we don't live in each other's pockets and don't see each other often enough for her to be more in my life than someone that I was dating.

And no, I don't text or email her.

Would it ever be a deal breaker for you if your partner
Would either refuse to give up a ex that was a friend, or on the flip side if your SO asked you to give up your friend that was a ex?