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Topic: Dating advice from friends
miko1960's photo
Sat 04/13/13 12:47 PM
Edited by miko1960 on Sat 04/13/13 12:47 PM
Mystery always works with us guys kind like to work for it, I don't want to know everything up fromt about someone I just met, like the old saying, it's not the destination, it's the journey.
drinks

1Cynderella's photo
Sat 04/13/13 01:45 PM



I ususally tell all my dates what I really want. Most just look and it tends to run them away, when I mention committment rather than Sex. :tongue:
My friend told me not to go on the internet for a date. laugh


I have to confess, I'm confused by "commitment rather than Sex". Can't you have both? smitten

And you would get an even better response to wanting a commitment TO Sex. drool :laughing:


No thanks, I respect my Body and only in Committment do I have Sex. bigsmile


biggrin Only kidding Toody! :thumbsup:

dreamerhand's photo
Sat 04/13/13 02:12 PM
when i start to feel that am not important to a person,I take the initiative to stay away.So when someone feels that am quite far....it doesnt mean that i intentionally left the person.
Maybe i just felt the person doesnt need me at all.....

no photo
Sat 04/13/13 06:10 PM

A friend of mine gave me some dating advice today.

He said, "Never tell someone you're dating, or want to date, what you really want, because you'll give them all the ammunition they need to make you fall in love with them."

Who thinks that's sound advice?

Has this ever happened to you?

If so, do you guard what your looking for from potential dates so they can't just attempt to be what they know you want them to be?






This sounds like he's advising you to not be truthful and I don't agree with that.

miko1960's photo
Sat 04/13/13 06:21 PM
In my younger days and even now I have never had a problem finding women to date, my best advice to you is just be yourself, has always worked for me, true I wasn't every womans cup of tea, but hey rejection is part of life.

oldhippie1952's photo
Sat 04/13/13 06:21 PM
Edited by oldhippie1952 on Sat 04/13/13 06:22 PM

A friend of mine gave me some dating advice today.

He said, "Never tell someone you're dating, or want to date, what you really want, because you'll give them all the ammunition they need to make you fall in love with them."

Who thinks that's sound advice?

Has this ever happened to you?

If so, do you guard what your looking for from potential dates so they can't just attempt to be what they know you want them to be?






I don't know. If a woman tells me what she wants, I don't try to change to fill her bill, I'm just not a match. Likewise, if I told someone what I wanted (that's a laugh as I don't know myself) and they became that person I have an innate suspicion.


*makes note to self to write down someday what he wants*

no photo
Sat 04/13/13 07:41 PM
Maybe I sounded slightly angry in that last post, but some friends you really lose your trust for. Online friends don't seem to want to wreck a relationship, unlike some offline one's. It's weird how people you've known for years, can suddenly be unsupportive, or a backstabber. And yet there they were at school, trying to encourage me to fancy boys. Ironic. Heh. I don't let it get me down. I just know who not to talk to when it comes to relationship talk. I know I'm no Carrie Bradshaw, but I just don't like the whole gossip factor.

1Cynderella's photo
Sat 04/13/13 07:55 PM
Edited by 1Cynderella on Sat 04/13/13 07:59 PM

Your friends advice is to lie?

Hmmmm

Your friend is a f'n idiot.

Anyone who can try to get love through lies or deception....deserves nothing but loneliness.


No, Krupa. I assure you my friend is no liar and would not encourage anyone to lie.

He's suggesting that laying too much on the table to soon can give someone, who's more interested in a conquest than getting to know you, the knowledge they need to lie to YOU, tricking you into thinking they are someone you'd be interested in...something they are not.

He has known of guys who do that and was warning me about players since he knows I haven't dated in a really long time. That's all.

1Cynderella's photo
Sat 04/13/13 08:16 PM

Maybe I sounded slightly angry in that last post, but some friends you really lose your trust for. Online friends don't seem to want to wreck a relationship, unlike some offline one's. It's weird how people you've known for years, can suddenly be unsupportive, or a backstabber. And yet there they were at school, trying to encourage me to fancy boys. Ironic. Heh. I don't let it get me down. I just know who not to talk to when it comes to relationship talk. I know I'm no Carrie Bradshaw, but I just don't like the whole gossip factor.


I wouldn't say it's slightly angry, certainly more than slightly unfortunate.

If that has been your experience, it's just how you feel about what has happened.

This guy has been my closest friend for over 20 years. He has no reason whatever to throw a kink in my dating life. He is the one who encouraged me to start dating again, and he wants to see me deliriously happy with some awesome man...he just worries about me and wants me to beware of players. I'm not sure the word existed when I was last dating. laugh

1Cynderella's photo
Sat 04/13/13 08:21 PM
Edited by 1Cynderella on Sat 04/13/13 08:48 PM


A friend of mine gave me some dating advice today.

He said, "Never tell someone you're dating, or want to date, what you really want, because you'll give them all the ammunition they need to make you fall in love with them."

Who thinks that's sound advice?

Has this ever happened to you?

If so, do you guard what your looking for from potential dates so they can't just attempt to be what they know you want them to be?








This sounds like he's advising you to not be truthful and I don't agree with that.

Maybe I worded it poorly, but that's not at all the case.

As I told Krupa, he was basically warning me about players and telling me not to give a guy a step by step guide on how to snow me into thinking he is someone he's not. He is telling me to wait until I've established that the guy is who and what he says he is and actually interested before telling him too much about what I'm looking for in a partner. flowerforyou

no photo
Sat 04/13/13 10:58 PM

A friend of mine gave me some dating advice today.

He said, "Never tell someone you're dating, or want to date, what you really want, because you'll give them all the ammunition they need to make you fall in love with them."

Who thinks that's sound advice?

Has this ever happened to you?

If so, do you guard what your looking for from potential dates so they can't just attempt to be what they know you want them to be?



"What you really want"? Yea I'd leave that out of any potential datees range... But what's wrong with telling people you're single and dating? Like a good advertising campaign, just get it out there... You could be surprised who steps up and it may open your eyes to the overbearing... do everything for you types.

Everyone wants to be exclusive right off the bat, ridiculous IMO. There's nothing wrong with "dating" women having multiple men trip over them...

Good threads Cynderella flowerforyou


1Cynderella's photo
Sun 04/14/13 09:18 AM


A friend of mine gave me some dating advice today.

He said, "Never tell someone you're dating, or want to date, what you really want, because you'll give them all the ammunition they need to make you fall in love with them."

Who thinks that's sound advice?

Has this ever happened to you?

If so, do you guard what your looking for from potential dates so they can't just attempt to be what they know you want them to be?



"What you really want"? Yea I'd leave that out of any potential datees range... But what's wrong with telling people you're single and dating? Like a good advertising campaign, just get it out there... You could be surprised who steps up and it may open your eyes to the overbearing... do everything for you types.

Everyone wants to be exclusive right off the bat, ridiculous IMO. There's nothing wrong with "dating" women having multiple men trip over them...

Good threads Cynderella flowerforyou




Thanks John. flowerforyou

I don't think I could date more than one at a time though. I'm not that talented, even if I wanted to. laugh

ruth74's photo
Sun 04/14/13 10:11 AM
Hmmm...on one hand, I prefer to observe the actions of friends and get my own advice based on what I see rather than what they say.
On the other hand, there have been times that friends have offered me valuable insight about my actions that I never really knew.
Basically my approach in the dating world is to be an open book, but not to give things away.
You ask...I answer honestly. I ask, I would like an honest answer in turn.

no photo
Sun 04/14/13 07:31 PM



A friend of mine gave me some dating advice today.

He said, "Never tell someone you're dating, or want to date, what you really want, because you'll give them all the ammunition they need to make you fall in love with them."

Who thinks that's sound advice?

Has this ever happened to you?

If so, do you guard what your looking for from potential dates so they can't just attempt to be what they know you want them to be?








This sounds like he's advising you to not be truthful and I don't agree with that.

Maybe I worded it poorly, but that's not at all the case.

As I told Krupa, he was basically warning me about players and telling me not to give a guy a step by step guide on how to snow me into thinking he is someone he's not. He is telling me to wait until I've established that the guy is who and what he says he is and actually interested before telling him too much about what I'm looking for in a partner. flowerforyou


Yeah, that sounds different than what you put in the OP. But, I guess since I don't have a checklist of what I look for in a guy since they've all been different, I don't think it would be something I'd worry about.

no photo
Mon 04/15/13 08:16 AM



A friend of mine gave me some dating advice today.

He said, "Never tell someone you're dating, or want to date, what you really want, because you'll give them all the ammunition they need to make you fall in love with them."

Who thinks that's sound advice?

Has this ever happened to you?

If so, do you guard what your looking for from potential dates so they can't just attempt to be what they know you want them to be?



"What you really want"? Yea I'd leave that out of any potential datees range... But what's wrong with telling people you're single and dating? Like a good advertising campaign, just get it out there... You could be surprised who steps up and it may open your eyes to the overbearing... do everything for you types.

Everyone wants to be exclusive right off the bat, ridiculous IMO. There's nothing wrong with "dating" women having multiple men trip over them...

Good threads Cynderella flowerforyou




Thanks John. flowerforyou

I don't think I could date more than one at a time though. I'm not that talented, even if I wanted to. laugh


I hear ya there... My definition of dating is "getting to know someone" Can I get to know more than one person at a time?... I think so yes.

no photo
Mon 04/15/13 10:46 AM
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no photo
Mon 04/15/13 10:47 AM
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