Community > Dating & Relationships

Topic: Stop being picky
MariahsFantasy Joined Mon 11/28/11 Posts: 6593	Wed 12/05/12 11:34 AM
I disagree, respectfully. If a person doesn't know their own mind, desires, values etc. the chances of engaging with a compatible mate are diminished. If people never leave their comfort zone...The ability to learn is diminished. Being afraid is safer than taking a chance. If that works for you, I only have one chance at life...Every risk is worth it. Doesn't work for me, I was quoting an epidemic among society.

Bravalady Joined Sun 01/01/12 Posts: 1034	Wed 12/05/12 08:31 PM
Cripey, every risk? The risk of AIDS or other sexual diseases? The risk of getting assaulted if your new bed mate turns out to have a jealous spouse? What you said sure sounds cool, but I bet you don't even do that yourself. Common sense is always a good idea. Frankly, I can't see why someone wouldn't be picky if they were looking for a lifetime partner. I knew there would be one...Common sense is a great idea. Way to blow my opinion out of context as well, do you frequent the political threads too? Every risk within common sense, where, if I might ask...Is the common sense in automatically shutting someone down because of perhaps only one reason? Hell, I invite you to tell me where the logic is in that too. You didn't mention common sense. You specifically said "every" risk. I can't help it if you don't say what you really mean.

FearandLoathing Joined Fri 12/28/07 Posts: 30121	Wed 12/05/12 08:44 PM
Honestly...If that is what you pick up from what I said, I'm not the problem here.

singmesweet Joined Mon 07/28/08 Posts: 26661	Wed 12/05/12 08:48 PM
Honestly...If that is what you pick up from what I said, I'm not the problem here. I actually agree with her. If you don't say what you mean, it's not other peoples' fault that they didn't get exactly what you meant. It does help to say exactly what you mean, rather than expecting people to read your mind.

FearandLoathing Joined Fri 12/28/07 Posts: 30121	Wed 12/05/12 08:52 PM
Honestly...If that is what you pick up from what I said, I'm not the problem here. I actually agree with her. If you don't say what you mean, it's not other peoples' fault that they didn't get exactly what you meant. It does help to say exactly what you mean, rather than expecting people to read your mind. I really do not care, my point still remains.

sweetestgirl11 Joined Fri 09/12/08 Posts: 30087	Wed 12/05/12 08:52 PM
I disagree, respectfully. If a person doesn't know their own mind, desires, values etc. the chances of engaging with a compatible mate are diminished. If people never leave their comfort zone...The ability to learn is diminished. Being afraid is safer than taking a chance. If that works for you, I only have one chance at life...Every risk is worth it. but that should be an individual choice - no one should be forced to leave their comfort zone. I can be comfortable and learn quite well, actually. not that I think the occasional calculated risk might be worth it....we take chances every time we inhale. it's a matter of the degree of the thing

FearandLoathing Joined Fri 12/28/07 Posts: 30121	Wed 12/05/12 08:53 PM
I disagree, respectfully. If a person doesn't know their own mind, desires, values etc. the chances of engaging with a compatible mate are diminished. If people never leave their comfort zone...The ability to learn is diminished. Being afraid is safer than taking a chance. If that works for you, I only have one chance at life...Every risk is worth it. but that should be an individual choice - no one should be forced to leave their comfort zone. I can be comfortable and learn quite well, actually. not that I think the occasional calculated risk might be worth it....we take chances every time we inhale. it's a matter of the degree of the thing I never said it wasn't an individual choice. I simply stated that it is not mine and noting a correlation if such could be made.

singmesweet Joined Mon 07/28/08 Posts: 26661	Wed 12/05/12 08:54 PM
Honestly...If that is what you pick up from what I said, I'm not the problem here. I actually agree with her. If you don't say what you mean, it's not other peoples' fault that they didn't get exactly what you meant. It does help to say exactly what you mean, rather than expecting people to read your mind. I really do not care, my point still remains. Ok

sweetestgirl11 Joined Fri 09/12/08 Posts: 30087	Wed 12/05/12 08:55 PM
So thats the reason why you are alone? So whatever interest is taken in you, just go with it? How about we treat every aspect of our lives that way. Think about it. What if your favorite shoe store only had a pair of red clown shoes? What the heck, go for it. Why settle for something just because it's there, even if you don't like it? How can you possibly know that you don't like something if you don't even try it. How can you know that you aren't actually picking the wrong type of person every time if you haven't found "the one" yet? You cannot force someone to be romantically interested in someone they're just not interested in. Why try to do that? this - telling someone they are too picky sounds like saying we cannot want that romantic attraction - that if we will not settle for less we are " being picky" if the romantic attraction is there I am not at all picky, but it has to be there - it is one of very few non negotiables

Dodo_David Joined Fri 08/13/10 Posts: 48950	Wed 12/05/12 08:58 PM
this - telling someone they are too picky sounds like saying we cannot want that romantic attraction - that if we will not settle for less we are " being picky" if the romantic attraction is there I am not at all picky, but it has to be there - it is one of very few non negotiables If you claim that someone else is being too picky when it comes to dating, then you sound as if you are saying, "Stop being so picky. Date me."

ladyliz1417 Joined Wed 12/27/06 Posts: 51463	Thu 12/06/12 12:28 AM
I would rather be alone and be picky then with someone that I don't even care to be around.... AS far as the clown shoes I would go barefooted... DITTO!!!!!!!!

kamleshxo Joined Mon 12/03/12 Posts: 4	Thu 12/06/12 04:23 AM Edited by kamleshxo on Thu 12/06/12 04:26 AM
Relationships(any) is matter of making it work rather than choosing rightt person. If everyone out there go on being picky. we would end up without being anywhere. Even in case of choosing the best paterner,it is still about making it work. And it's not about comprimising, but about respecting and understanding differences. what say?

sweetestgirl11 Joined Fri 09/12/08 Posts: 30087	Thu 12/06/12 06:06 AM
this - telling someone they are too picky sounds like saying we cannot want that romantic attraction - that if we will not settle for less we are " being picky" if the romantic attraction is there I am not at all picky, but it has to be there - it is one of very few non negotiables If you claim that someone else is being too picky when it comes to dating, then you sound as if you are saying, "Stop being so picky. Date me." but that sounds like the person who would say that does not hold themselves in a high enough regard don't you think?

DTHRomeo Joined Wed 06/20/07 Posts: 43387	Thu 12/06/12 06:38 AM
I'm not picky I just happen to attract Lunachicks :/

TxsGal3333 Joined Tue 09/05/06 Posts: 76455	Thu 12/06/12 08:01 AM
I'm not picky I just happen to attract Lunachicks :/ Maybe you should be a little more picky....just saying But honestly even being picky does not seem to keep the strange ones at bay

Zero_Effected Joined Sat 12/02/06 Posts: 18395	Thu 12/06/12 11:17 AM
If everyone out there go on being picky. we would end up without being anywhere. I agree with this ^... but to say one should work on a relationship even if it's NOT the right one.. I beg to differ.. being picky (in my mind) is having a few certain criteria that we HAVE to have in order for a relationship to last, even if only for a SHORT time.. I don't believe people WILL have ALL their 'wants' fulfilled.. but there should be a few 'needs' met, at the very least, in order for the relationship to have even the remotest chance at success.. I'm not looking for perfection.. but I AM looking for someone that in some way.. compliments my character

Dodo_David Joined Fri 08/13/10 Posts: 48950	Thu 12/06/12 01:01 PM
I would rather be alone and be picky then with someone that I don't even care to be around.... AS far as the clown shoes I would go barefooted... DITTO!!!!!!!! A woman turning down a pair of shoes?

Kahurangi Joined Thu 04/26/12 Posts: 1970	Thu 12/06/12 03:17 PM
So thats the reason why you are alone? So whatever interest is taken in you, just go with it? How about we treat every aspect of our lives that way. Think about it. What if your favorite shoe store only had a pair of red clown shoes? What the heck, go for it. Then it wouldn't be my favourite shoe store anymore.

Toodygirl5 Joined Fri 10/26/12 Posts: 15073	Sat 12/08/12 04:09 PM
So thats the reason why you are alone? So whatever interest is taken in you, just go with it? How about we treat every aspect of our lives that way. Think about it. What if your favorite shoe store only had a pair of red clown shoes? What the heck, go for it. If a woman does not have Standards; she ends up falling for just any Old man.

AlphaRebel Joined Thu 11/12/09 Posts: 246	Sat 12/08/12 10:09 PM
I disagree, respectfully. If a person doesn't know their own mind, desires, values etc. the chances of engaging with a compatible mate are diminished. If people never leave their comfort zone...The ability to learn is diminished. Leaving one's comfort zone would likely not involve stepping outside the parameters of what is deemed desirable.