When you contact someone for the first time, what kind of things do you normally write? Are you specific and tell them what you liked in their profile or pictures? Or are you more vague and just let them know they have a nice profile?

When I contact someone, it's because I found something specific about them that I liked. It could have been something they've said in the forums, or in their profile. I attempt to start a conversation based on that.

I'm attracted to the quirky, usually there is something about a first impression I get from a pic...dunno what it is, but it seems to strike a chord where I feel compelled to just msg out of the blue with a howdy do.

For me, it is some little thing from the profile which usually leads me on to make the first approach :-) I also try getting in touch with some of the Forum posters whose comments i like :-) That way, i start out on a conversational mode

I almost never contact anyone for romantic possibilities. But friends from the forums I message them because I like who they are and we will have the same interests. Conversation can start any which way.

I Tell them the.....Truth!!!

90% of the time I contact someone it is something funny or interesting they say in forums that stays in the forums. To me that is hardly contact but some people will jump on it and that just backs me up.

It has to be a pretty remarkable profile both visually and text wize for me to contact someone for a personal reason. Nothing to do about physical attractiveness but a great sparkleing smile will knock down a wall once in a while. Maybe if they ask for some feed back but not always then. A beligerent list of this is who I don't want to contact me even if it is nothing I would do they are swirling the drain. I am amazed at the people who can not "close" a sale of themself in a written presentation. I recommend reading and old timer called Zig Ziggler because he can teach you how to "sell and eskimo snow".

A rare few will I move to email friends. I already have so many friendships and family bonds that I am trying to maintain via mail I just do not have time. I really think that is most people. If you want to get into someone's radar range you have to offer something that they want to read initially and maybe in some future communication. Something they are interested in and or funny. I am an artist/DIY'er/gardener so if someone doesn't send me something that connects that way it is like Ehhhh; next. I don't care if they put themself on the cross and wrote their whole life history, prove they are solvent and family centered, even professed undying love. And yea that many people do write.

Even more rarely considering bringing them into a real world relationship. I think it is I have real world friends already but just picky who I hang out with and who I would bring around my circle. I don't need anyone causeing "trouble" with my peaceful neighborhood. Why screw up my oasis in a world that has had enough drama years past?

So yea that is a lot of hurdles for someone to come into my life or the reverse of that for them to want me and unknown in their's.

Now that I have MY home to Myself I spend days and even weeks with no one in. Probably a reaction to the invasion of all my kid's and then my Dad's "people". Got used to not having anyone in of my own so it is not like I miss it.

Sometimes I PM new members just to let them know that someone acknowledges their existence.

I just say hello and let them know they peaked my interest and go from there.

Great that you welcome new members! Good for you!!

If I have read a profile and find more than one similarity I usually will mention that, so what kind if art do you like, or what not. Sometimes if they have said something peculiar I will email them and ask them about it. That is, if they are cute enough for me.

I usually do not contact first unless it is someone I know from the forums. Then...it is usually something about the thread of what they said.

I only make a contact if there is something that interest me in that person.

Usually my first emails go something like, "Hello. What's your namey? Do you like green eggs and ham"? You know....an attention getter.

Do you let them know what interested you, or just say they caught your interest? A guy contacted me yesterday saying my profile interested him. I asked him what specifically interested him, as I was curious. He was very vague about it and got mad at me because I asked him to be specific, telling me I was too demanding. I thought that was really weird.

Yeah thats pretty weird. If he thought it was so interesting why not have a discussion about it.

A guy emailed me and liked my tag line and some of the art on my profile. Most of which are some of my favorite anime...that usually gets the conversation started. I checked out his profile and he is a writer and a social worker...which is exactly me as well. Funny how that is.....the last two guys I have met have had a lot of similarities but I guess that is why they email us in the first place. Then they get scared and run away, lol. Commitment phobes.

I only send emails to non-forum participants if there is something in their profile that grabs my attention. The last guy I wrote to played baseball at Cal State Long Beach which is where I went to school. We were there at the same time and even grew up in the same neighborhoods. So, I had something to say. I'll write to people even if I have no romantic interest in them if their profile has something worth commenting on or asking about.

I ask for their hand in marriage, sometimes I just ask for their hand.

I'll also contact people I have no romantic interest in if their profile is interesting, or what they say in the forums is interesting. I don't think I've ever sent an email that just said "hi," as there's no point. So, I prefer people who contact me to actually have something to say, too.

I think sometimes if a person contacts you they may not know or feel comfortable telling us why. Since a big percentage is physical attraction at least initially that kind of puts us on the spot because we are suppose to be more whatever than just likeing someone's looks.

If people do this; especially a guy does this; well often the response is a0 disqualification of whatever he said he liked "oh no my hair looked terrible that day", b) "perve" instead of Thank You c) If he says he likes something you said often it is "that is not what I said" or "why are you stalking me" instead of thank you for paying attention. It is kind of a double standard. And somewhat of a no win situation.

I am told asking a guy why they are attracted is like saying they are screwed up, you are fishing for a better compliment, or that you are generally asking them the second string so you can be more or less attractive to them or to attract someone else. Men are keenly aware they always have competition.

If a person looks at my profile or the other way around I usually send them a message.