Well I am looking for a female version of myself.

Intellectual, Sarcastic, Science Geek, disregards magic thinking, enjoys music (probably plays an instrument), manages her weight (few extra pounds is fine), dresses sharply (cares moderately about appearance), isn't too picky food wise, isn't too picky cleanly wise (its ok to not vacuum up the dog hair every day) basically doesn't sweat the small stuff. Can engage in a discussion about anything even if doesn't really have an opinion one way or the other. Enjoys recreational euphoria in moderation (while being safe), and has some kind of passion. IMAGINATION!

I really cannot control what I find attractive, but I have learned the basic criteria of what is, and isn't attractive to me.

If a women wears bigger jeans than I do . . . I am sorry that is not attractive.

If a women doesn't brush her hair, or it looks like she has gunk on her teeth . . . I am sorry that is not attractive.

If a women is always asking me what the meaning of the "big" words I use are . . . I am sorry that is not attractive.

If a women doesn't keep herself clean down there . .. you know . . . that isn't very attractive.

I prefer small women, but that isnt set in stone apparently, becuase I have found some very tall (and I guess big boned) women very attractive.

I think for myself, the mental attributes/habits hold a greater "weight" then the physical attributes.

You've come across as unhappy on here. Should people back off in that case, too? And it isn't just you. Several people here come across as quite unhappy. So, I'm not sure that weight has much to do with that kind of attitude.

I think people should back away from me. I'm not always very nice to others, and I find my life to be quiet empty, maybe because I always end up pushing others away, I don't know.

I didn't have a good upbringing as a young child, and I have over protective parents. So, now I've become a very shallow and mild person.

And yet you're worrying about the attitude of overweight people, because you feel they don't seem happy enough? Strange.

I'm sorry, but, unhappy people and me, we don't get along well.

From what you're saying, it seems like you think all overweight people are unhappy. Maybe you're projecting your bad mood/attitude onto those you don't find attractive?

Yeah, most men have a lot maturing to do. The vast majority of women do not look like a waif. Sorry guys. Killed ya dreams. Sorry shallow peeps, 'tis the truth. Cut to them waking up in a nursing home, stolid and alone. They deserve it quite honestly. Maybe its the LA thing, but to me, if you're more concerned about the numbers on the devil invention that is the scale, then wowch. I am so TIRED of looks being the front row seat to a "good" life. We are still children in the playground. This is what we've grown into. Men: the media has bought you off. They told you how to think, congrats for taking the bait.

Hmm...maybe you shouldn't get anyone pregnant. Just a thought. I think the women will appreciate the repulsive action really. Its more of a compliment.

Tons of people come from the same background. Doesn't mean you shouldn't think a certain way because this is how mostly every guy is thinking.

Well, I think its really sad you feel this way. Usually people of that history have more tact when it comes to appearance. If you continue to judge purely by exteriors then you'll always feel sad. You'll continue pushing everyone away.

I'm sorry but women who FEEL and LOOK healthy in a general sense are NOT unhappy.

'wwll part of the reason for me that I am big is due to in part I am slightly disabled, and for me I have to exercise less rigerously. I am going to the gym and working out and learning to eat differently. I will always be big however. If they do not like me as me to bad. 'but I am finding it helpful to hear what others have to say.

But as it's said beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I'm not attracted to heavy men and I'm a big girl myself, but have had men who loved me and didn't have a problem with my size. I'm beginning to love myself just the way I am and if a guy isn't attracted to me then that's ok. No matter who we are or what size we are, color of our skin, eyes, or hair we can meet someone who will accept us and love us for who we are.

I do find it strange the way so many men are vilified simply for having a preference. We are "shallow" and "superficial" and "manipulated" just because we're not attracted to what someone else thinks we're supposed to be attracted to.

And I can't speak for anybody else, but I'm simply not attracted to the ones people think I should be attracted to. I don't understand how they think they're in any position to dictate to me what it is I'm supposed to like.

I'm not saying they have to agree with it, but at least don't act like I've committed an unpardonable sin by not being attracted to this one or that one.

The fact is, I'm not attracted to very many people at all. Only a few, only a couple of very well-defined types. That's it. I'm not saying the others are bad people. I'm not saying there's anything wrong with them. All I'm saying is that, on a very fundamental, visceral level, there's no attraction there.

I wish people would stop taking this so personally. I like what I like, and name-calling is not going to make me change that.

Could not have said it better, myself..REALLY and I agree...((((((SexyLexy)))))

Thank you!!

The first quote is rather idealistic.

The second quote is the reality.

The biggest thing is to have a healthy perception of yourself. Forget the crud the media sells us.

The grass isn't greener on the other side of the fence either.

People have preferences....whether it's weight, height, hair color...whatever. That is what they are attracted to. That doesn't mean they think someone that doesn't fit what they like is less of a person. It just means there isn't that physical attraction. Nothing wrong with that.

Skinny people get jokes about their weight too (I've heard them all) and just because someone looks like a Barbie doesn't mean they are superficial or air heads.

People are who they are. People will like what they like

I'm still looking for my red headed mountain man named Charlie (specific enough lol) but that is the type I like....doesn't mean others are less of a person to me though.

AMEN LEX

That is not fat. that is what the average women looks like.

People have preferences

i find it funny how people get all defensive as soon as someone mentions they're not attracted to bigger people.
who cares.
move along.