It can be true, though. Talking through problems takes much more effort than just ignoring someone. Ignoring the problem/person doesn't really help in most cases.

Obviously, it's the only thing to do in some situations, though. If you've tried to talk to someone about an issue many times and they just don't get it, or refuse to start/stop doing what you ask, sometimes the only thing to do is just stop talking to them. However, in most cases, it's not the best option.

Most people, I think, seek to be understood as much as to understand but neither can happen without communication

at the same time tho, we cannot force others to talk with us - I would not view an acquaintance ignoring me the same way that I would view my partner ignoring me, or a good friend, for example

if someone cuts me off, I simply determine that they really were not my friend with honorable intentions in the first place

You mean that you are still sober enough to aim straight?

Right - communication is very important.

I never said anything about forcing someone to talk. I'm just trying to understand a bit more why people ignore others.

Just stopping the relationship is not "the silent treatment" in
my way of understanding it. Stopping a fruitless relationship is
fine and a healthy thing. But passively aggressively being around
someone intentionally and refusing to talk as a method of showing
disapproval is what I would call the silent treatment and it is
surely silly, detrimental and pointless.

Put that way, yes.

I've just been sooooo lucky to know two ar$es. Please don't let me meet anymore.

something to keep in mind


and i'm guilty of ignoring the problem... i dont necesarily give "the silent treatment" but i wont want to talk about whats bothering me until i'm over it... and i do that because, when i'm upset, i dont think about what i say.. and i dont want to say something hurtful that i didnt mean...

The silent treatment is a punishment.
Meant to do its job.

Just keeping your mouth shut can be
a different thing. You know, waiting
until you are calm and coherent.

But to stop talking, ignoring attempts
at communication, methinks that will
come around and bite you on the azz.

well then obviously u were not a friend to them in the first place

yes those were my words not yours....I meant it in a manner of speaking....as in agreeing with you, yes someone who is your FRIEND will communicate and not ignore u or use a silent treatment - even if u don;t "get it" as ur friend they would not take that approach - in a normal misunderstanding - but ultimately tho we agree communication is best - it can't be forced or even expected - it is a gift (in my opinion)

I think too that sometimes the silent treatment means you've hit a nerve - they know you are right and don't have the balls to deal....

if it was "fruitless" there was no real friendship there in the first place so the whole issue thus becomes moot IMO

OK I'll be the arse here - in my opinion this comment does not reflect well - just a thought, nothing personal

Enjoy the silence...people talk too much anyways ....

I am not talking about stopping a relationship. We were talking about the same thing.

Humm myself I tend to go off by myself play on the computer or do yard work. In order to think things out then I go back and talk to them. But it is best to just leave me alone till I have had time to think things through.....

I think thinking things through is fine. Everyone has to do it at times.

I was really asking about ignoring someone instead of talking things through.

Ignoring someone does not solve problem...can actually make things worse

"ignoring it" is a way of not dealing with a problem

it is always better to deal with the issues and come
to a reasonable resolution

at best, ignoring an issue does nothing to help the
situation. often ignoring a problem causes additional
problems as well due to a lack of ability to communicate
effectively compounding the problems.

Communication...and not punishment