Community > General Discussion

Topic: What causes most hardships in most of your relationships?
TattooedDude81 Joined Wed 12/05/07 Posts: 1403	Mon 05/23/11 05:52 AM
Most the hardships I've noticed in my relationships have been money...what else..

fireflysgirl Joined Mon 10/18/10 Posts: 2957	Mon 05/23/11 05:55 AM
Financial hardships ruin so many relationships! I think many people have unrealistic expectations on how much the other person is willing to give/sacrifice! Too many or too severe "conditions".

TattooedDude81 Joined Wed 12/05/07 Posts: 1403	Mon 05/23/11 05:57 AM
But it's ok firefly, once I graduate college, I'm gonna be bankin!! Then I can have all those ex's of mine see what I came out to be, and they can then kiss my a$$ Cause none believed I can/could do it in the first place.

fireflysgirl Joined Mon 10/18/10 Posts: 2957	Mon 05/23/11 06:13 AM
But it's ok firefly, once I graduate college, I'm gonna be bankin!! Then I can have all those ex's of mine see what I came out to be, and they can then kiss my a$$ Cause none believed I can/could do it in the first place. ROFLMFAO Tattooed!!!! When I run into old friends that find out I am working towards a doctorate they always ask, "WTF made you decide to do that"! I answer with, "so my ex MIL can refer to me as Dr. Little B!tch

TattooedDude81 Joined Wed 12/05/07 Posts: 1403	Mon 05/23/11 06:15 AM
But it's ok firefly, once I graduate college, I'm gonna be bankin!! Then I can have all those ex's of mine see what I came out to be, and they can then kiss my a$$ Cause none believed I can/could do it in the first place. ROFLMFAO Tattooed!!!! When I run into old friends that find out I am working towards a doctorate they always ask, "WTF made you decide to do that"! I answer with, "so my ex MIL can refer to me as Dr. Little B!tch Good firefly!!! Maybe we can go yatching someday while they watch..

sweetestgirl11 Joined Fri 09/12/08 Posts: 30087	Mon 05/23/11 06:49 AM
Financial hardships ruin so many relationships! I think many people have unrealistic expectations on how much the other person is willing to give/sacrifice! Too many or too severe "conditions". well really that's why I think it's good if the partners are both self supporting because then u come together as equals doesn't mean u have to have the same income necessarily or always be that way and there are times that people to depend on each other but overall I think it is beneficial

fireflysgirl Joined Mon 10/18/10 Posts: 2957	Mon 05/23/11 06:55 AM Edited by fireflysgirl on Mon 05/23/11 06:56 AM
Financial hardships ruin so many relationships! I think many people have unrealistic expectations on how much the other person is willing to give/sacrifice! Too many or too severe "conditions". well really that's why I think it's good if the partners are both self supporting because then u come together as equals doesn't mean u have to have the same income necessarily or always be that way and there are times that people to depend on each other but overall I think it is beneficial yup & when it ends you are not scrambling to be able to support yourself! My parents really emphasized being self supportive and not depending on anyone else to meet your basic needs in life...I thank them for that! Tattooed...hell yeah we will! I'll accidentally, on purpose mail them pics

AndyBgood Joined Thu 12/25/08 Posts: 12437	Mon 05/23/11 09:35 AM
Wanna start a real furball? When your girlfriend asks you if the dress she is wearing makes her look fat any answer you give her is guaranteed condemnation. So look her right in the eye and say, "no the dress does not make you look fat, You make you look fat!" and leave the room. When she follows you with that pissed off look in her eyes look her right in the eye and say, "YOU asked the question that any answer would condemn me so I spelled it out and if you are going to get mad at me well then, get mad. I don't care! END OF ARGUMENT!" and walk away on her again! honesty can get you in trouble so if you are in a position to be damned jump in with both feet!

navygirl Joined Sat 06/02/07 Posts: 8118	Mon 05/23/11 10:44 AM
Wanna start a real furball? When your girlfriend asks you if the dress she is wearing makes her look fat any answer you give her is guaranteed condemnation. So look her right in the eye and say, "no the dress does not make you look fat, You make you look fat!" and leave the room. When she follows you with that pissed off look in her eyes look her right in the eye and say, "YOU asked the question that any answer would condemn me so I spelled it out and if you are going to get mad at me well then, get mad. I don't care! END OF ARGUMENT!" and walk away on her again! honesty can get you in trouble so if you are in a position to be damned jump in with both feet! I have never asked a man's opinion about a dress as I could care less what he thinks about what I wear or how I look. I figure I am an adult and the only one that knows what I should wear is me.

stefy Joined Sat 11/20/10 Posts: 2946	Mon 05/23/11 12:23 PM
Let me start off by saying that there is not a "perfect" relationship when you use the word perfect to describe the actual realtioship. Now, I do believe that two people can be perfectly made for one another. It is up to them to see it, and to realize it, and seize it. And even while these two individuals are perfect for one another, they will still have trials and tribulations. And, I believe, the one problem that is at the top of most couple's lists' is communication. You can't assume that just because you are in tune with your partner that he/she knows what you are thinking. People aren't mind readers. So you have to take the neccessary steps to communicate. I know. Easier said than done. But think about it. If you truly love someone, then why would you not be forthcoming with them? Why just hold that it? Why? Why? Why? That's easy. Some people over analyze things. "Maybe I shouldn't tell Jane about how I really don't like her meatloaf. I will just suffer through one meal just so she is happy." Silly things like this can lead to real problems down the road. True. You tell her that her meatloaf stinks, she is gonna be hurt. But it will heal. She will realize you were honest. And she will know that you will not hold back. If she asks you for an opinion, you will give it to her. I know guy code normally warns to always tell a "white lie" cause it does suck to see your woman upset. But she can get back at you when she tastes your horrible Mac N' Cheese. It all balances out. If you ever say to me that you don`t like my food i will never cook for you again! Better suffer through one meal...just saying

actionlynx Joined Wed 08/18/10 Posts: 5448	Mon 05/23/11 12:39 PM
Let me start off by saying that there is not a "perfect" relationship when you use the word perfect to describe the actual realtioship. Now, I do believe that two people can be perfectly made for one another. It is up to them to see it, and to realize it, and seize it. And even while these two individuals are perfect for one another, they will still have trials and tribulations. And, I believe, the one problem that is at the top of most couple's lists' is communication. You can't assume that just because you are in tune with your partner that he/she knows what you are thinking. People aren't mind readers. So you have to take the neccessary steps to communicate. I know. Easier said than done. But think about it. If you truly love someone, then why would you not be forthcoming with them? Why just hold that it? Why? Why? Why? That's easy. Some people over analyze things. "Maybe I shouldn't tell Jane about how I really don't like her meatloaf. I will just suffer through one meal just so she is happy." Silly things like this can lead to real problems down the road. True. You tell her that her meatloaf stinks, she is gonna be hurt. But it will heal. She will realize you were honest. And she will know that you will not hold back. If she asks you for an opinion, you will give it to her. I know guy code normally warns to always tell a "white lie" cause it does suck to see your woman upset. But she can get back at you when she tastes your horrible Mac N' Cheese. It all balances out. I promised myself I wouldn't post in the Forums after my last set of tribulations, but then I read this. Now I am breaking my promise because this describes exactly how I feel. A lack of communication and openness often leads to over-analysis. When your partner cannot communicate with you properly, it leads to guessing games. Sooner or later, the guessing game becomes destructive. It clouds the issues, breeds doubt, and eventually a loss of faith. I'm still here because I find it hard to let go. My head still spins over everything that happened, and I feel embarrassed, humiliated, and dishonored. I feel lost. And yet, I still don't understand why I should feel that way. Now I'm just hoping to move on to something better.

navygirl Joined Sat 06/02/07 Posts: 8118	Mon 05/23/11 01:09 PM
Let me start off by saying that there is not a "perfect" relationship when you use the word perfect to describe the actual realtioship. Now, I do believe that two people can be perfectly made for one another. It is up to them to see it, and to realize it, and seize it. And even while these two individuals are perfect for one another, they will still have trials and tribulations. And, I believe, the one problem that is at the top of most couple's lists' is communication. You can't assume that just because you are in tune with your partner that he/she knows what you are thinking. People aren't mind readers. So you have to take the neccessary steps to communicate. I know. Easier said than done. But think about it. If you truly love someone, then why would you not be forthcoming with them? Why just hold that it? Why? Why? Why? That's easy. Some people over analyze things. "Maybe I shouldn't tell Jane about how I really don't like her meatloaf. I will just suffer through one meal just so she is happy." Silly things like this can lead to real problems down the road. True. You tell her that her meatloaf stinks, she is gonna be hurt. But it will heal. She will realize you were honest. And she will know that you will not hold back. If she asks you for an opinion, you will give it to her. I know guy code normally warns to always tell a "white lie" cause it does suck to see your woman upset. But she can get back at you when she tastes your horrible Mac N' Cheese. It all balances out. If you ever say to me that you don`t like my food i will never cook for you again! Better suffer through one meal...just saying I would rather the truth than make anyone suffer through a bad meal. Instead of getting upset; I would try to improve my cooking.

addy21 Joined Sun 12/20/09 Posts: 1	Mon 05/23/11 01:10 PM
Trust

MrBiscuit Joined Tue 05/17/11 Posts: 1996	Mon 05/23/11 01:11 PM
I am a very honourable person. I have yet to meet a lovely lady, that is to my own personal standards.

iwasaking77 Joined Wed 10/08/08 Posts: 47	Mon 05/23/11 01:13 PM
Lack of Communication and loosing the sight of bigger goal in a journey of life as partners.

Goofball73 Joined Mon 11/05/07 Posts: 33913	Mon 05/23/11 02:31 PM
Let me start off by saying that there is not a "perfect" relationship when you use the word perfect to describe the actual realtioship. Now, I do believe that two people can be perfectly made for one another. It is up to them to see it, and to realize it, and seize it. And even while these two individuals are perfect for one another, they will still have trials and tribulations. And, I believe, the one problem that is at the top of most couple's lists' is communication. You can't assume that just because you are in tune with your partner that he/she knows what you are thinking. People aren't mind readers. So you have to take the neccessary steps to communicate. I know. Easier said than done. But think about it. If you truly love someone, then why would you not be forthcoming with them? Why just hold that it? Why? Why? Why? That's easy. Some people over analyze things. "Maybe I shouldn't tell Jane about how I really don't like her meatloaf. I will just suffer through one meal just so she is happy." Silly things like this can lead to real problems down the road. True. You tell her that her meatloaf stinks, she is gonna be hurt. But it will heal. She will realize you were honest. And she will know that you will not hold back. If she asks you for an opinion, you will give it to her. I know guy code normally warns to always tell a "white lie" cause it does suck to see your woman upset. But she can get back at you when she tastes your horrible Mac N' Cheese. It all balances out. If you ever say to me that you don`t like my food i will never cook for you again! Better suffer through one meal...just saying Yes Dear.

wux Joined Wed 07/29/09 Posts: 7426	Mon 05/23/11 03:59 PM Edited by wux on Mon 05/23/11 04:01 PM
My head still spins over everything that happened, and I feel embarrassed, humiliated, and dishonored. I feel lost. And yet, I still don't understand why I should feel that way. Hey! I feel like that on most days. When not, then it's worse. Much worse. You're also a human being. Suck it up. Much better than being a sea animoe, but I heard that even that's debatable.