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| Topic: This is one of my older profiles | |
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Edited by
Atlantis75
on
Sun 06/27/10 10:14 PM
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I wrote this about a year ago on another dating site, I had zero mails after this....
 
I'm gonna write you some know-hows instead of letting you know, that I'm a single very good looking guy with a ferrari and horse farm and I got green eyes.
A guide how to be unsuccessful to meet anyone, but stay on the dating site for a long time. First, you need to post a picture, which has to be very bad quality. Pictures in this category qualifies, if the picture is blurred, or made in a room with not enough lights, so it covers the bad spots. You will definitely stay on longer, if you got a boyfriend next to you on the picture, with either a blurry spot over his face, or a poorly cropped picture, with his arm still on your shoulders or grabbing your boobs. Second. Post a pet picture . The dog/cat/goldfish either has to be licking your face or you kissing him on the nose and/or sleep with you at nights or at least eat from the same plate as you. Third. You need to WRITE WITH CAPS ON. Since, think your words reaches more viewers by having the caps-lock on and stand out from the crowd. For extra credit, write LOL, IROCK AND I"M VERY HOT very often, so we males get to know that you "rock" and you are "very hot". You don't need to post a picture if you write those, we'll trust you, based on your words. Fourth: DO not post your income; your status of smoking and drinking habits. Instead just choose "I'll tell you later". This will intrigue us even more, since we really want to know if you are either drinking/smoking and makes us think that you are very mysterious and full of surprises. Fifth rule: Tell us that you go out every week and you have a lot of friends, but for some reason all the guys just a bunch of a-holes anywhere you go. No more nice guys left on this planet! If you follow these rules, you will stay here on this dating site indefinitely, for our pleasure to stare at your profile forever and send you mails and nudges, which should provide some entertainment every day you log on. Oh, and I'm kidding;-) good luck girls, everyone is pretty! |
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I like the last line!
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Atlantis, great sense of humour. Thanks for the yuks!
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See I would've left out the last line. Anyone with any sense would hopefully know you are not serious. I once wrote that I wanted to be abused and just all around mistreated and you wouldn't believe the mail I got. Only like 2 out of 56 realized I was trying reverse psychology. That is hilarious tho. I definitely would have responded to that.
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might as well give it a try since honesty doesn't seem to get me too far on here...
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I wrote this about a year ago on another dating site, I had zero mails after this.... hummm, so in celebration of this colossal failure you thought it a good idea to post it again? ok? |
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might as well give it a try since honesty doesn't seem to get me too far on here... Some people just dont want honesty, they like being lied to at every turn. |
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My profile on here's not doing so well either. I wonder what it could be?
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