Topic: Sex Facts- Calories And Weight Loss
rara777's photo
Sun 03/07/10 08:07 PM





SEX ... THE BEST WAY TO GET IN SHAPE!


Giving head... massages the jaw....while burning 32 calories.

Swallowing foreign body juices is actually like taking vitamins and
it whitens your teeth

The American Dental Association says that semen cuts plaque better
than mouth wash, so suck a Dick and save a smile.

Having nice sex burns 358 calories.

Having rough sex [make it hurt] burns 543 calories.

Take off her clothes
with her consent.........................12 cal
without......................187 cal

Take off her Bra
With two hands..........................8 cal
With one hand.........................12 cal
With mouth.............................85 cal

Put on Protection
hard .......................... 6 cal
soft..........................315 cal

Foreplay
Looking for target...................8 cal
Finding G spot ......................92 cal
I don't Fu* king care.....................0 cal

Entry
Holding her..................12 cal
On the floor.................8 cal

With Different Position
Missionary..........................358 cal
Doggy...........................316 cal
69 lying...............................286 cal
69 standing.............................512 cal
Italian hanger.........................912 cal

Orgasm
Real................................112 cal
Faking................................315 cal

After sex
Lying in Bed............................18 cal
Hop off the bed............................36 cal
Wondering why she left pissed off...........816 cal

Get dressed
Quiet and calm...........................32 cal
Rushing.........................98 cal
Heard her friend opening the door.............1218 cal
Heard her dad at the door.............1942 cal
Her mom walking in..............................Priceless!!!





:wink: Sounds damn good to me.:wink:

Except for mom walking in. At my age, mom would be using a hovermobile and run my azz over.:laughing: rofl


OK, I admit it ... This one made me spray ... :laughing:


... No, not that ...


tongue2 ... My drink, ya pervs ...


Glad I could help a sista out.:wink: laugh smokin

no photo
Sun 03/07/10 08:38 PM
I don't know about y'all, but I know what exercise program I am starting. ASAP!!!:banana: :banana: bigsmile blushing

greeneyedlady42's photo
Sun 03/07/10 08:45 PM
I laughed so hard at this I almost wet myself. I couldnt stop giggling. This is too halarious.
No one could make this stuff up- Its just too good!

heavenlyboy34's photo
Sun 03/07/10 09:27 PM
Edited by heavenlyboy34 on Sun 03/07/10 09:27 PM

I don't know about y'all, but I know what exercise program I am starting. ASAP!!!:banana: :banana: bigsmile blushing


I'll be there to assist ASAP, beautiful! drool smitten flowers love

no photo
Sun 03/07/10 09:33 PM

I don't know about y'all, but I know what exercise program I am starting. ASAP!!!:banana: :banana: bigsmile blushing


I was thinking the same thing.. laugh.

Ladylid2012's photo
Sun 03/07/10 10:14 PM


I don't know about y'all, but I know what exercise program I am starting. ASAP!!!:banana: :banana: bigsmile blushing


I was thinking the same thing.. laugh.


methinks most of us would love to have this as out exercise program

Remember..save a smile, suck a Dick drinker

no photo
Sun 03/07/10 10:40 PM
When reading horizontally from Shakespeare's original published copy of Hamlet, the furthest left hand side reads 'I am a homosexual' in the last 14 lines of the book. Was this a message, or just a coincidence?

According to the World Health Organization, there are approximately 100 million acts of sexual intercourse each day.

A female orgasm is a powerful painkiller (because of the release of endorphins), so headaches are in fact a bad excuse not to have sex.

In a recent interview with 10 prominent sex therapists, the question was posed, 'What is the most important aspect in love making? One said 'relaxation', Three said 'honesty', and a whopping Six out of Ten said 'staying awake'.

Lip stick was invented in the Egyptian times for women that specialized in oral sex. They wanted their lips to look more like their vaginas.

Every year, 11,000 Americans injure themselves while trying out bizarre sexual positions.

Ladylid2012's photo
Sun 03/07/10 10:46 PM


Lip stick was invented in the Egyptian times for women that specialized in oral sex. They wanted their lips to look more like their vaginas.



rofl rofl rofl

Yeah, that's always been my goal in life

no photo
Sun 03/07/10 11:36 PM
Kissing was created to actually simulate something that was rather gross. Maybe I'll write about it tomorrow... I just ate something and I don't want to get sick thinking about it :laughing:

ArtGurl's photo
Mon 03/08/10 12:12 AM
Edited by ArtGurl on Mon 03/08/10 12:15 AM
Don't you dare ruin kissing for me Angel!!! surprised laugh


Lori that is too funny! laugh

Jtevans's photo
Mon 03/08/10 01:42 AM



According to the World Health Organization, there are approximately 100 million acts of sexual intercourse each day.





75% is of people pleasuring themselves :tongue:

Ladylid2012's photo
Tue 03/09/10 08:04 AM

Humans aren't the only ones who masturbate. Cows, horse, dolphins, monkeys, porcupines and even cats have been seen masturbating in the wild.



I'm wondering if my cat would use one or both paws....what

no photo
Tue 03/09/10 10:21 PM

I'm wondering if my cat would use one or both paws....
Wouldn't it be easier for them to just get some 'tail'... tongue2

no photo
Tue 03/09/10 10:29 PM



I don't know about y'all, but I know what exercise program I am starting. ASAP!!!:banana: :banana: bigsmile blushing


I was thinking the same thing.. laugh.


methinks most of us would love to have this as out exercise program

Remember..save a smile, suck a Dick drinker



Think I'll keep smiling, thanks.....smokin

Jtevans's photo
Wed 03/10/10 12:40 AM


Humans aren't the only ones who masturbate. Cows, horse, dolphins, monkeys, porcupines and even cats have been seen masturbating in the wild.



I'm wondering if my cat would use one or both paws....what



maybe he's one that switches

Englishrose2's photo
Wed 03/10/10 02:33 AM

Giving head... massages the jaw....while burning 32 calories.

Semen contains creatine, citric acid, nitrogen, vitamins C, B12 and E, calcium, potassium, nitrogen, vitamin B12, protein and zinc. All of which are extremely healthy!

He's a little known fact that I learned when I was a semi-pro body builder. The pros (the schwarzenegger types) regularly (on a daily basis) masturbate and digest their own semen. No they're not gay, and no they're not crazy. They do this because of the extremely high level of creatine and protein that's in semen. More than eating a thick juicy steak. Creatine and protein are two of the most used body building supplements, and they both help you to build muscle (which means it helps you to burn fat and be thinner). The more semen you digest, the quicker you lose that unsightly weight. A study published in the International Journal of Sports Medicine showed that creatine helps you to burn extra calories when taken. And we all know that muscles are made up of protein (and are the opposite of fat). I'm sure one of these days we'll all be hearing about the semen diet... :wink:




Thanx for sharing that with me excuse me while i puke!!ill ill ill ill ill ill ill ill ill Anna x

Ladylid2012's photo
Tue 03/16/10 09:18 PM
My gawd..this joke is like the energizer bunny, it just keeps going and going and going. :laughing:

no photo
Tue 03/16/10 09:27 PM
Edited by AngelArs on Tue 03/16/10 09:30 PM
...did somebody say bunny....?


















..

Ladylid2012's photo
Wed 03/31/10 07:25 PM


I don't know about y'all, but I know what exercise program I am starting. ASAP!!!:banana: :banana: bigsmile blushing


I was thinking the same thing.. laugh.


Were all thinking the same thing.....pitchfork

nikita5's photo
Wed 03/31/10 07:28 PM
Now thats an exersize plan that is easy to stick to!:tongue: