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| Topic: what does a guy do? | |
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when he flirts? i seriously dont really know.. i dont get flirted with much... today i thought maybe i did so i came home and told my roommate.. he said the guy was flirting with me.. so what kinds of things do u guys do < in person> when flirting? and what do you expect the gal to do back in return if she is interested? its the funniest thing.. im not shy.. but when it comes to a guy who interests me for a potential date i am the most timid person i think i know... i have come to the conclusion that dating scares the hell outta me.. though ive gone on a few dates..just something im not good at.. probabaly why im single.. An example of what I might do: on an elevator look her in the eye, ask her name then say without breaking eye contact...it was a meet to pleasure you. |
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heres what happened today... i was in a very small liquor store.. while passing the front door , i notice this guy outside on his cell phone.. i dont normally even really notice stuff like that but he was talking about a trip with someone as i passed by, his back was turned to me. but i looked cause he was talking.. i go inside... a man in front of me.. then me in the line.. i saw something move behind me so i glanced.. it was the buff cell phone guy.. somehere between 35-42 not sure..when i glanced he smiled really big..with a flirt look in his eyes.. cant really tell u what was on my face at all!!i just turned back , quick glance.. then it was my turn.. i realize my debit card is the old one ex 1/10.. and forgot my new one at home..cashier says just a minute i said ok because i need to find my debit card anyway.. then thats when i realized i ask her is this card still good told ex date.. the guy behind replies it should be till the end of the month, i guess u will know when she scans it.. and i looked again that big grin... then when done it went through.. he says now that u know its good maybe u could use it on my purchase.. i know i smiled then..i still dont know but there were 2 people behind him.. and i did not know if he was flirting or what..my roommate said he was.. but what am i to do? yanno? ill never see him again lmao! I think you are reading into this too much.... yea, he was flirting, but not because he was interested in dating you or anything..he was just making flirtatious small talk. Sadly, you will prolly never see this guy again. It's too late now.. Next time don't be so shy, and say something clever back, and see what happens. 
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yea mine isnt a fear of rejection... that doesnt bother me.. but i just get nervous when they are a stranger.. that is why i usually date someone i already know.. or have talked to them for a while even online first even then.. i get nervous sometimes if i really thought i liked them!
stranger or not, its still fear of rejection. 
You date ppl that you already know, cuz you feel that you know in advance, if they kinda like you or not. (Through friends..etc) Casual flirting is not a commitment, just kinda a subtle way to find out if the other person is interested in you a bit or not. No one turns down a casual flirt, they may just not return it...and then you know that they are not interested..Pretty easy isn't it? If anything, its good practice to flirt with EVERYONE! It makes it soo much easier then when a guy that you are really interested in, comes along cuz you're on a roll! thank you!
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when he flirts? i seriously dont really know.. i dont get flirted with much... today i thought maybe i did so i came home and told my roommate.. he said the guy was flirting with me.. so what kinds of things do u guys do < in person> when flirting? and what do you expect the gal to do back in return if she is interested? its the funniest thing.. im not shy.. but when it comes to a guy who interests me for a potential date i am the most timid person i think i know... i have come to the conclusion that dating scares the hell outta me.. though ive gone on a few dates..just something im not good at.. probabaly why im single.. An example of what I might do: on an elevator look her in the eye, ask her name then say without breaking eye contact...it was a meet to pleasure you. 
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when he flirts? i seriously dont really know.. i dont get flirted with much... today i thought maybe i did so i came home and told my roommate.. he said the guy was flirting with me.. so what kinds of things do u guys do < in person> when flirting? and what do you expect the gal to do back in return if she is interested? its the funniest thing.. im not shy.. but when it comes to a guy who interests me for a potential date i am the most timid person i think i know... i have come to the conclusion that dating scares the hell outta me.. though ive gone on a few dates..just something im not good at.. probabaly why im single.. Whenever I'm flirting, I don't even know I'm doing it. I've been told that's what makes it so cute. I'm sure guys flirt with you all the time, you just don't know/realize it. I'm not exactly sure, but read up on body language and that should help you tell if someone is flirting, I think it's mostly body language. |
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hence he never got one date...
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gawd! maybe i should of never made this post!! im feeling kind of lame! and wow.. i know im better than that... exactly why i dont bother to date much!
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Edited by
buttons
on
Mon 01/11/10 11:23 PM
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i take that back maybe i have been rejected... in all different ways but they always come back.. i felt rejected anyway... i dont always take back.. or try agian.. as the yrs go by.. less and less cause its really a waste of time to try again,, but didnt have a rejected feeling in the begining... but maybe later on maybe it was... i guess it was thinking about it...if they treated me like crap in the end.. i guess that is a form of rejection... but why do they try to come back? if it was? im sooooo damn confused!
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also to ive had not many relationships... mostly long term ones.. a couple that lasted only 1 yr to 2 yrs... and all the rest longer. it it didnt make it past a month < which were only a few> i dont consider it a relationship..
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wait i dont want to sound too pure and i thought about this... i have dated 4 that lasted between 1 and 2 months... 3 that have lasted about 5 yrs each.... one for 6 yrs... and 1 for 3 yrs, two for one yr... and all the rest for 1-3 dates which werent many..so i have dated... but the ones that lasted for 1-3 dates were not equal to the rest....
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wow! i guess i havent dated so much!in my life!
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wow! why bother even? to hell with it! just never really thought about it before!
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I haven't really dated much or had many relationships. But, I'm working on that. There's some issues that I've started working on, and I have noticed that I've gotten a bit "soft", but I guess that's a good thing.
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Edited by
buttons
on
Tue 01/12/10 12:07 AM
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I haven't really dated much or had many relationships. But, I'm working on that. There's some issues that I've started working on, and I have noticed that I've gotten a bit "soft", but I guess that's a good thing. |
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I used to be hard on my self, but I've "forgiven" myself for a lot of things and I've learned to accept myself.
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Edited by
buttons
on
Tue 01/12/10 12:47 AM
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honestly im 46 yrs old i dont know why i even bother to care at this point.... i always wanted to be with someone for the rest of my life.. for love and nothing else... i guess im a bit old to even worry about that anymore..cause its just not gonna happen... i forgive myself for all my mistakes..and i have made many..i have not had many expectations outta my future.. sure i still have hopes.. but they will happen if they happen...if they dont then oh well...i know this... if a guy is interested i guess id better know it... cause im not gonna sit around outside a door waiting... nor am i gonna waste my time chaseing anyone.. if it is not meant to be... so be it... i dont expect anyone to chase me nor do i want to chase!! but interest has to be shown...till then i have nothing in my eyes.. other than just casual flirting as cinderella puts it.. i was just curious though...i would so dig a guy just off the wall asking me to carry out my groceries lol! wow never had anything like that!! to me something like that would be unique... just never had anything like that happen to me before..i guess untill that type of moment comes.. ill just never know.. if it ever does come if not im good with that too...
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I used to work in a grocery store, and I had to ask if they wanted a cary out. I do enjoy helping people. I don't approach women, but not out of a fear of rejection, it's more because I'm not sure when/where it would be appropiate. Besides, I'm not sure what I should say. I wouldn't want to give her any kind of a weird or negative feeling but I guess that's a risk you have to take.
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That, or you could have gone with, "Hey big boy! Is that a bottle of crown in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?" 
Why am I not surprised this coming from you...
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That, or you could have gone with, "Hey big boy! Is that a bottle of crown in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?"
Why am I not surprised this coming from you...
I was just saying she should of said that. I am a complete  Honest!
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when he flirts? i seriously dont really know.. i dont get flirted with much... today i thought maybe i did so i came home and told my roommate.. he said the guy was flirting with me.. so what kinds of things do u guys do < in person> when flirting? and what do you expect the gal to do back in return if she is interested? its the funniest thing.. im not shy.. but when it comes to a guy who interests me for a potential date i am the most timid person i think i know... i have come to the conclusion that dating scares the hell outta me.. though ive gone on a few dates..just something im not good at.. probabaly why im single.. Forget about rejection, there's a billion other men who will say yes. Rejection may be a temporary loss of morale, but it isn't that big. Come on who here hasn't been turned out, I have, plenty of times, I get over it quick. You ask a woman to dinner, she says no, oh well. I asked my former boss (prior to her hiring me) on a date, she said I was just a little too young, then she hired me. I worked over 2 years with her, was I sobbing about it? Absolutely not! Actually she babied me a bit, and seemed to favor me. If she got upset I'd have the accidental pencil drop and bend over a bit, that always relaxed her. Okay, now I'm off topic. Buttons you are a beautiful woman, work on your eye contact and smile, if you look at a man enough, regardless of how shy he may be, he will know to approach you more aggressively. Men can tell from your eyes, but be careful, sometimes they may get timid themselves. If you feel like the experience is at a stalemate, meaning neither of you are making a move, you need to break the ice. You can do anything to see if a man is interested like drop an item of yours, ask for directions, have an imagined car problem. If he doesn't know anything about cars and likes you, he will try. There's so many things or variations of ways to try to pick up decent men. There's an idea, how about we start a new thread how do we know if a man is into a woman, and all the men can give some hints and tips. |
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