OK, I am 52 and have grown children but I also have a beautiful 7 year old daughter. Of course, she is my number one priority, I would like to know how the over 50 crowd feels about this? Is it a plus? Is it a deal breaker? Does this make me less marketable? I would appreciate feed back from both sexes as I have run into more and more men that are raising children alone, or have young children later in life. Thank You

Kandy

I have a 31-year-old daughter and a 13-year-old son. I just happy that I still have a young one around. I never give a second thought to how it affects my marketability.

But, I know what Sweetcheeks is saying. She's just wondering what the fellas who might be looking to settle down are thinking about a woman in her age bracket with a little one. She's not saying she will put her child up for sale or hide her when people come over.

eight yeras ago I was looking at the same thing, a lady friend had a 2 yr old (she was 47) and I was willing to take them both in to my life. Sorry to say thats not how it ended I don't think I fit the sute she was looking for. So now were still both alone only diffrence is Im more Independentnow. I still care a lot for her but I cant let myself go throgh that again.

My best friend finally got around to getting married and now has two young girls. Everyone is different. There are some who would shy away and some who would be attracted for that reason. I would say the odds of finding the right guy rest mainly on the chemistry between the two of you and, if that works, everything else will fall into place.

Deal-Breaker for me.

This can be a touchy situation. Age of the child, would have alot of bearing on how I would handle it. A young child, would bring a need for the more of a meeting of the minds, on rules for raising children, before any "final" committment. Mid teens & above, would cause different considerations. My stepdaughter & I had a conversation, while Gwen & I were living together. We came to an understanding, that didn't involve her mom's involvement. Worked fine, till her mom's death.

I wouldn't really want to be raising a child, at this age. But if the mother was important to me, I wouldn't make that a deal breaker.

There is no simple answer

I wrote 3 paragraphs of reasons, examples and situations. The
end was just two things.

For some it would be a deal-breaker

For others, it would be wonderful.

I don't mind dating someone who has a child depending on how old the child is. I've already raised my children. I'm not interested in raising someone else's. I've also found that whenever I have met someone with partial custody that most of their available time is spent with the child and they don't really have time to start a relationship. Building a relationship takes time and energy. I wouldn't say I would never date someone with children at home but I would definitely proceed with caution.

At this age I don't want to be raising any small children. However, is it a "deal breaker", no, but it is a yellow flag.

I would rather not date someone with young kids..but at my age thats not that likely anyway!

Thank you all I really appreciate the comments. From them I am thinking I might be spending night alone for the next 11 years lol. She is more than worth it. I have grown kids also all on their own so I do have babysitters. What about eldlerly parents living with someone? Is that a deal breaker also? We are the sandwich generation, could be small kids could be elderly parents. I don't have my parents any more but would like thoughts on this issue also.
Have a great weekend everyone.

I do not like using absolutes, but it is almost a certainty that small children at this stage of life would be a deal breaker for me.

I have to give my take on this, mostly my values. I've always felt that if a person were to date or marry another that has children no matter the age that its a all or nothing situation. If you love someone enough to marry them the family is a package deal to be loved as if they were your own.

I think I'd rather date someone with young children - I've found, as a Mr. Mom, I like it. Surprised me!!!

I was a large part of raising or helping to raise my late husbands 3 boys. I guess I have to say, been there and don't want to do it again at this stage in my life. So for me, young children would be a deal breaker BUT this is just me...lots of people would be thrilled to have the chance or second chance.

You are right, we are at that sandwich age, I am actually trying to move to Maine in order to be nearer my folks so I can be there when they need me. Fortunately they are fine so far and who knows, they may out live me!

As for living with elderly parents vs. young children (or teens, whatever) I think both situations hold pluses and minuses - if you are aware (and how cold you not be) of the situation from the beginning and choose to date and become involved and fall in love then you are also choosing to except the whole 'package'

I have a 14 year old. He keeps me young (ha) but men I have dated have told me that since I was not free to up and go anytime I wished, that they would find someone who was. shrugs. That is their choice.

I dated a man with a young son recently, and have found as I have gotten older I simply can't handle it.

To be honest, a lady with a young child will make me pause where the same lady without the young child would not. That's not to say that it's a deal breaker. It's just "less than perfect" is all.

It would be a plus to me.