<<--- picks up the shoe phone and calls head quarters


}}}}}}agent 92 is compramising my identity send out the cleaner{{{{{{

I'd have to invest in some aviator sunglasses to pull off the tom selleck look... and some scary 80's gear

I'm no rat, but i know a jew who wont give up bacon.

Oh sweetie can I spy?...I am the he-man master of recconaissance. 6 1/2 years of that crap.

A group of legionnaires strode through the scorching desert.

They hadn't had water for three days and hadn't eaten for a week
but they did not crack, and kept marching solidly on. Suddenly one
of them froze, "Psssst" said he. His companion halted, and
strained their eyes to where the first legionnaire was pointing

"Le voila", said he, "Regardez, mes amis, isn't zat a bacon tree
on ze 'orizon"? And sure enough, there it stood, proudly and
defiant in the middle of the desert, a true bacon tree.

Slowly they crept forward towards the mystery object far off. Inch
by inch, centimetre by centimetre, until they were within a
stone's throw of the bacon tree.

Even nearer they crept, and suddenly, a shot rang out, dropping
one of the legionnaires in his tracks. The other legionnaires hit
the ground as bullets thudded into the sand around them. The other
two returned fire, and gave first aid to their wounded companion.
Even as they bandaged him, they could hear his faint voice -

"Zat was no bacon tree," he gasped, "Zat was an 'am bush.

Yes, because i have a chest of hair akin to that that of Sean Connery.

WE Can use you as a mat!!!!

If you get me aroused i could double up as a door stop.

Would i be a double agent?

You could be.......but you are kinda furry........maybe we could use you as a hair tie????

You could always shave me down and use me as a Mikael Gorbachev lookalike

Pony tails on men aren't hip or cool.

Pony tails on ninja's? ...wrong.

Pony tails on guinea pig's? ...funny.

Pony tails on chuck norris? ...awesomeness beyond comprehension because lets face it, if chuck norris could rock a pink and green holiday sweater sown by jone rivers... chuck norris can wear a pony tail.

dan your bum hair is amazing!!!