"This dating thing is NOT how it looked in the brochures!"

You got a brochure? What the hell?! I didn't get a bloody brochure!

I got the brochure, and the 'free weekend' in the condo. All I have to do is attend some 3 hour meeting about a timeshare.

I got the brochure, too. Every page, it talks about how laid back and easy going the place is.

"tHiS iS MS.BUbbL3S...iM 19...i LiK3 NiC3 CUt3 fUNNy GUyS...i LiK3 GUyS WhO GOt A SiNC3 Of hUMOR BUt KNOW Wh3N tOO StOP PLAyiN AROND...iM JUSS LOOKiN fOR A fRi3ND WhOS GONNA B3 fAitHfUL tOO M3...i WANt A MAN WiTh StR33t SMARtS tHAtS AGGRESiV3 BUt CAN StiLL B3 A G3NtL3M3N...i dANC3 AND i liK3 tOO B3 ACtiV3...i lOV3 KiDS DR3AM Of hAViNG A BOy AND A GiRl..."


Written on the same keyboard they use to type ransom notes.

"Names Kelly. I'm Me.. I'm not going to try to be someone else.. So like me or hate me it's your problem.. "

It's kind of a 'lose / lose' situation.

First I would like for you to press play on this song! Listen to the lyrics it describes what I'm looking 4 with out me even saying a word!"


I want you to watch the movie "Transformers" and look at Megan Cox. That will describe what I'm looking 4.

"IN MY FUTURE I WILL LIKE A GOD HUSBAND."


Aiming a little high there....

Is it that simple? Watch Dr. Who and look at Rose Tyler. That will tell you what I'm looking for.

Don't all reply at once, now.

"I am going to take a break... see you soon...!!!"


Bring me back a t-shirt or a coffee mug or something.

"I am educate, sincere, funny and honest person."


Funny, yeah.

"I am a single woman of 22 years, to the one that he likes to be friends to him to, I have a son, I am single, I am not in a hurry in finding a pair, only it is necessary to have patience."

And a better translator, I'm thinking....

OMG...my son and I LOVE the new-ish Dr. Who series (we've got 3 seasons!) It's a long shot from the old 70's episodes from Public Television, but great! I miss Rose, actually...but do like the season 2-3 Dr. Am waiting to see if there's another transition.


(and BTW - Megan Cox...great abs, really mediocre actress, but I suppose that doesn't matter given the great abs!)

" I want a sugar daddy. I don't want to work. All I want to do is shop all day long and blow your money.I'd really like to have a maid, and want you to pay for it. And while your at work, I'd like to go on vacation some where like... shopping in NY. And I don't want to cook, we can eat out every night. And while I'm laying out by the pool, You can be cleaning it! Because I'm all that!!!I'll almost always lie to you. And, I'll act like I love you to your face, and run around behind your back. OH, and I'm always right, and it's ALWAYS gotta' be my way!!!"



I miss the good ol' days when we hid all our faults until at least the first date.

Please, as a representative of womanhood, I beg...please tell me you did NOT cut that from an actual profile!

"Why i bother with this site i dont really know?? Guess i need my faith restoring in human kind?? Ive had too many strange men contact me, i dont do cyber or phone sex?? So boooogar off!"


One down, ten billion to go....

"If ur just lookin 2 see how many u can lay then be on ur way"


Oh look, Johnnie Cochran has a profile on here....

You guys crack me up! I guess I should add "loves chatting with a serious smart-a$$" to mine.

'night boys! Don't flip too many pages while I do the rest/recover/responsibility thing again...

"happy person seeking sole mate to share lifes up's and down's not looking for a toy boy so if under 35 thank's but no thank's"


Another one looking for a fish -- also hasn't the faintest idea of how to use an apostrophe. I think I'm breaking out in hive's.

"can the maker of the stars come and heal my breaking heart?"


Sorry, he's booked through next month. But I have a cousin that knows a guy that can swing you a really nice deal.