To me it does not matter man or woman how can someone just up and walk away from their child? My friends soon to be ex wife has chosen to leave her husband and her 2 children and take off to go live with her boyfriend.
Plus, my ex has decided he will sign over his parental rights to his child. He has no emotions about it and does not care. How can these people live with themselves?

it's pure selfishness

ahhh...my ex wife did the same thing...walked away from her kids...selfish...but was great for me to be rid of her

Oh I'll be glad to be rid of him at this point too! He has done nothing to help us at all.....I just dont look forward to explaining this to him when he is old enough to understand!

some ppl (adults) have been abandonded their entire life...

and its the vicious cycle reapeating itself...

not everyones mother, father, sister , ect. loves them

cares about them,

or is even glad they are alive..

Sounds immature to me, the sooner he's gone, the sooner you can find a man who will support you.

Some people just really do not care about anyone except themselves... period.

I posted this on another forum and had some nutjob come in and tell me how selfish we parents are for having children in the first place. Then she starts spouting out about how MY mind is in disneyland when considering mental illness. Does this topic seem like a discussion about mental illness??

Its immature among so many other things. The saddest fact is that it is the innocent children involved who pay the price in the end!

My children have a father who did not give up his parental rights. He lives about 6 miles from us and sees his 2 children on holidays. My kids are now 16 and 19 and my 19 year old son told me and my family at Christmas dinner that he doesn't have a father and hasn't for years.

It breaks my heart that my kids continue to be hurt by this man's actions. I make all kinds of excuses for him, because I don't want to make them feel like they have been abandoned by their dad. I knew the day would come when they were old enough to make their own decision about him. I just always held out hope that he would step up and take an active interest in them.

So my question to you all is: Should I continue to try to take the sting out of his actions and encourage them to see him when he wants to or should I allow them to refuse to see him?

I don't mean to highjack this thread, but since they are so similar, I don't want to start a new thread and have people get all pis*y about it.

That woman sounds like she has some issues of her own. I wouldn't worry to much about her advice.

I dont understand why people do this, and not have some kind of emotion. My sons father doesn't want anything to do with him. I have sat here and worried about what I will tell him when he starts asking. But in the meantime, I can't worry about that now. Just take things as they come, and when he does ask, just be honest and let them know it isn't their fault. Good luck to you.

My sons father never sees him either. He blames it on my sons special needs. I asked him why he never sees his other two kids who have nothing wrong with them. Loser.

just be honest with your son,in time he will figure it out for himself..as for myself I dont know how anyone could walk from a child either.

(JMO) but since the kids are now 16 and 19 they are old enough to see things as they are and make decisions. When I was 17 my dad passed away. His family came out of the woodwork to be there for him and us until everything was finalized. They managed to walk away with anything and everything of value with no thought to the 2 kids he had. At that point my mom gave us the chance to make up our own mind about the family and what contact we had. To this day 13 years later we have not had contact with any of them!

My point is your kids know what they want. I feel that forcing them to see their dad will only cause resentment and possibly make matters worse. They could eventually change their mind and want to be a part of their fathers life again in time!

My son's father blames me. He says its my fault and he also said he would be glad to sign off rights to get me out of his life. The sad thing is that I have not been a part of his life since I walked away from him 3 months pregnant. He has never seen my son nor had he ever seemed to want to. In the past when we would attempt to discuss a way for them to meet it would always boil back to the same arguments about us and who was right or wrong. He hates me for leaving while I was pregnant and he hates me for not bending over backwards so that he could play the good daddy. He has 3 other kids with another woman, they have never been to court for child support issues, custody or visitation. He is not financially responsible for any of his kids but he gets to play the good daddy spoiling them while their mom works 3+ jobs to support her kids!

When you figure it out, let me know.

Srsly, its usually mental illness, shame/guilt, lack of conscience, or a deep, unfillable hole in the pit of your soul that does it.

I raised both my daughters completely on my own, with no help or even visits from their "mother" from the ages of 7 & 5.
Thank God I had my family for a support system.

One thing I find really sad about this situation is that I dated a guy for almost 2 years when my son was a baby who was more of a father than bio dad is. When I chose to leave my ex, pregnant and scared, I worried that no one would want to be strapped with someone else's responsibility! I've gotten over that and I have also seen there are more people willing to step up for someone else's child than the actual bio parent is willing!

Very sad!

My son's father has a no contact order with him until he is five, yet he is harrassing me to get visitation. I am going to do everything in my power so that he cannot be a part of my son's life until my son is old enough to decide if he wants to see him himself.

In my opinion, some people are just not good parents. I would rather my son come up with wild fantasies about what it would have been like to be with his dad, rather than to chance my son being hurt again by actually being with his father.

So after consulted my friend who's a paralegal and also some serious thinking I have decided that there is no way I am letting my SOB ex off the hook that easy! He thinks it would be great to sign over his rights but I think he should pay! I know he isnt going to fight to see my son, hell he has not tried yet, so he can start paying to help raise my son! Whats fair is fair!

In their eyes, the world DOES revolve around them, everything is about them, if they feel good, it's ALL good no matter what reality says.