well do you really want to know if he's gay or are you just curious?

both

If you want to keep the person as a friend and knowing that information will not change anything? just as the person

If you want to keep the person in your life and knowing that they are gay will change or eliminate the friendship, don't ask.

Today's topic will be about abusive relationship.

If you are in or think you are in an abusive relationship, please go to: http://www.ndvh.org/
or call 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) 1-800-787-3224 (TTY)

~Abusive Personality
There are signs that can help you spot someone with an abusive personality. The earlier you become aware of these red flags, the easier it is to get out of the relationship. Take notice if the person you are involved with displays the following abusive personality traits:

Extreme jealousy or possessiveness
Pushes for quick and intense involvement
Seems too good to be true
Blames others for actions
Needs to be in control
Unrealistic expectations of the relationship
Easily upset or angered
Inability to respect partner's boundaries, privacy, need for separate activities or identity
History of violent behavior


~Signs of an Abusive Relationship
Abusive relationships are progressive. They do not begin with physical or sexual violence. Instead, tactics are used to gain control over the victim before hitting, kicking, biting, pushing or unwanted sexual activity is introduced. The following are signs of an abusive relationship:

Emotional Abuse (name calling, criticizing, “joking” in a demeaning or embarrassing way)
Intimidation (uses threats, looks or gestures to scare partner; breaking objects)
Isolation (uses jealousy to control what partner does, who he/she sees, where he/she goes)
Denies Responsibility (minimizes, denies or blames partner for emotions and behavior
Uses Children (threatens to harm the children or take them away from the partner
Financial Control (keeps partner from working or takes paychecks; demands account of all spending)


~Leaving an Abusive Relationship
The process of leaving an abusive relationship is difficult and dangerous. Safety is the primary concern. Even if you do not think your partner poses a risk, leaving often triggers an increase in violence. It is best to prepare as much as you can ahead of time.

Ask a friend or family member to keep items you gather to take with you. Make sure the person you choose will not tell your abuser about your plans to leave. Do not take anything that will be noticed as missing.

Things to Stash Away:
Money
Contact information for a local domestic violence shelter
Prescribed medications
Legal documents for you and your children (e.g. birth certificates, social security cards)
Photographs or written evidence of the abuse
Financial records and account numbers
Personal belongings possessing sentimental value
Clothing and personal needs

Things to Arrange:
A plan that safely removes yourself and you children from the home
Transportation for yourself, children and belongings
A safe place to stay
How to manage being gone from home for an extended time
Referral to a lawyer or legal advocate to obtain a personal protection order, temporary child custody order, etc.


Taken from: http://relationship.lifetips.com/cat/64781/abusive-relationships/index.html

Ever heard of speed dating? One of my good friends said that she was going to take to one but since I'm not single anymore that probably won't happen. However, below is some information about it.

How you ever done it? If yes, what was your experience? Would you do it again? If no, would you do it? What are your thoughts?

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Speed dating is a formalized matchmaking process or dating system whose purpose is to encourage people to meet a large number of new people. Its origins are credited to Rabbi Yaacov Deyo of Aish HaTorah, originally as a way to help Jewish singles meet and marry. "SpeedDating", as a single word, is a registered trademark of Aish HaTorah. "Speed dating", as two separate words, is often used as a generic term for similar events.

The first speed-dating event took place at Pete’s Café in Beverly Hills in late 1998. Soon afterward, several commercial services began offering secular round-robin dating events across the United States. By 2000, speed dating had really taken off, perhaps boosted by its portrayal in shows such as Sex and the City as something that glamorous people did. Supporters argue that speed dating saves time, as most people decide if they are romantically compatible very quickly, and first impressions are often permanent.

Organization
Men and women are rotated to meet each other over a series of short "dates", usually lasting from 3 to 8 minutes depending on the organization running the event. At the end of each interval, the organizer rings a bell or clinks a glass to signal the participants to move on to the next date. At the end of the event participants submit to the organizers a list of who they would like to provide their contact information to. If there is a match, contact information is forwarded to both parties. Contact information cannot be traded during the initial meeting, in order to reduce pressure (especially on women) to accept or reject a suitor to his or her face.

These events typically require advance registration, often an online prepayment by credit card. However, they may accept a few walk-ins when needed to balance the gender ratio. Some services make use of waitlists when signing up to strive for exactly the same number of men and women, while others have a more "party" atmosphere and only aim for an approximately matching number.

There are many speed dating events now in the UK, Canada, and the US. Many of these simply specify an age range for ladies and gentlemen; sometimes a slightly older range is specified for men. On the other hand, many organizers offer niche events such as nights for graduates only, gays and lesbians, older men with younger women and vice versa, book lovers, ethnic events, and of course the original niche event, religious affiliation.


Practice
Speed dating has some obvious advantages over most other venues for meeting people, such as bars, discotheques, etc. in that everybody is purportedly there to meet someone, they are grouped into compatible age ranges, it is time-efficient, and the structured interaction eliminates the need to introduce oneself. And unlike many bars a speed dating event will, by necessity, be quiet enough for people to talk comfortably.

Participants can come alone without feeling out of place; alternatively it is something that women who like to go out in groups can do together.

Because the matching itself happens after the event, people do not feel pressured to select or reject each other in person. On the other hand, feedback and gratification are delayed as participants must wait a day or two for their results to come in.

The time limit ensures that a participant will not be stuck with a boorish match for very long, and prevents participants from monopolizing one another's time. On the other hand, a couple that decides they are incompatible early on will have to sit together for the duration of the round.

Most speed dating events match people at random, and participants will meet different "types" that they might not normally talk to in a club. On the other hand, the random matching precludes the various cues, such as eye contact, that people use in bars to preselect each other before chatting them up.

Business speed dating has also been used in China as a way for business people to meet each other and to decide if they have similar business objectives and synergies. Speed dating offers participating investors and companies an outstanding opportunity to have focused private meetings with targeted groups in a compact time frame.

Taken from: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Speed_dating

lov doc if i was in luv wiv my best friend should i go 4 it

yes!!!! yes!!!!! and yes!!!!!!

if your friendship is strong enough, even if things don't work out, your friendship will survive. life is too short to wonder what if!

what about what it gets 2 the sex part

Dear love doctor,

I've realized that many ladies on this site get attention from a plethora of guys. How to I break away from being classified as one of the many and become 'that special one'?

email me!

Well anything that is done on the threads isn't always taken as serious.... so send her an email after you have chatted with her on the threads. Make an effort to be genuine and get to know her. Good luck!

Below is some information about blind dates, taken from: http://www.forbeginners.info/dating/blind-dates.htm


Blind dating is only recommended for people who have a sense of humor and who have confidence in themselves to handle any situation that might come along. It is not recommended for control freaks, anxious personalities or individuals that don't handle disappointment or rejection well. If you fear going on a blind date, then don't.
However if you are the type that likes adventure and a lot of faith in human beings, then you should have no trouble meeting someone in this way.


Many fear a blind date because they fear that something will go horribly wrong or that they will be made fun or that they will spend all night at the mercy of a psychotic stranger. This does not have to be the case. Avoiding disappointment on a first blind date is easier than it seems.

First of all it is recommended that you avoid dates that are completely "blind". Trade emails and talk on the phone with the individual first. Do as much research as you can about the person without being too nosy. Watch out for warning signs in their language and the content of their conversation. For instance, if they talk about the bar fight they were in last night and how many times they have broken their nose, you might want to consider the possibility that your date is violent. Stay away from people who talk too much about their ex partners (especially if it is in a bitter or resentful way). Also avoid people who talk about their addictions, alcoholism or last case of domestic abuse.

If the blind date was set up for you by a friend, make sure to get references and opinions from your mutual circle of friends.

When arranging where to meet, make sure it is in a very public place. Pick somewhere comfortable, but busy such as a popular restaurant or bar. Don't invite the person to your home and don't agree to go to his or her home.

This is not the time to suggest a highly unusual excursion, such as a trip to the amusement park or a hang-gliding. Keep your activities together as temperate and casual as possible. It is also not the occasion to suggest trying an exotic cuisine or unfamiliar food.

Although blind dates are all about creating a good first impression, that doesn't mean that you should go overboard when it is time to dress up. Remember that if you intend to see this person again that you might have to keep up the facade if you decided to present yourself as the type that wears high-heels and a power suit full-time.

Dating experts also suggest that women should not dress too provocatively for a blind date. Avoid hemlines that are too high, plunging necklines or fishnet stockings unless you are sure you want to have sex on the first date. Teasing a blind date with your charms is not a good idea.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


So the questions for the day....


have you even been on a blind date?

did it work out well? or bad?

any advice for someone going on a blind date?

how can 1 turn flirtin wiv girls into a relationship wiv women?

ask you question a different way, I don't understand what you are asking.

lets say i flirt wiv all the women
how could date the 1s i like and possibly turn those into relationships

You ask the girl for a date. And see what happens.