Iam currently pregnant due August 22 (c section), the babys father decided at 5 1/2 months he didn't want the baby. I was recently hospitalized, the babys father was called but that was it. He's mentioned he wants to be in the baby's life but shows no intrest.

So give him another chance or no ???

Another chance? Chance at what?

He's already screwed you once (no pun intended) why be a glutton for punishment?

I would say.....NO!!!!!

you are going to have enough to deal with...you don't need the added stress of wondering if he is or isn't going to be around to help....if he is truly interested in being a part of the baby's life, he will make the effort...

Best of luck to you....

Thats up to you

As long as the child will never be in any danger give him a chance the kid deserves that.......

do what you feel is right

Uhhhh,is this a trick Q?...Tell him not to let the door hit his ass on the way out

Well, he is the kids father, no matter what he has done. If he wants to be in the kids life, then let him, unless you think he is going to hurt it in some way. Let him know that he cant decide he does want to be a part of the kids life one minute and then not the next. Kids need stability and if their father is in their life one minute and out the next, it can be traumatizing for them. Tell him he has one shot at it and if he decides again he doesnt want anything to do with the kid, then his decision sticks.

the fun thing is i told my x husband so my daughter could be told he steped up and was at the hospital and helped me get home lol.

<----- big fan of second chances, but give him time and space to really think about what he wants; if he just wants to be a part of baby's life then I say sure

Ditto!

I was once in that situation years ago.
I worried myself about the father of my son so much it made me ill. Concentrate on yourself and your little one. I know its hard and you wish the father to be there. You have alot on your plate right now and need to be calm and ready for when your baby arrives. When the father grows up and takes some responsabilities- that is when you will be able to let him in your childs life. He may or may not be there. I hope for the sake of his child he does take responseabilities. Good luck to you!

How old is the father of the child?

Take care of your child and move on. When he is man enough to man up and you see that. thenm let him in the childs life, simple as that. Don't wast time on somone that is not going to be there or doesn't know how to yet. Goof luck

This is a decision that you and your child are going to have to live with, so think it over carefully. You are going to have to do what you think is right.

On the other hand, the father could continue to be an irresponsible lout even AFTER the birth of your child and NOT be present at all. At best, the fella could turn into a "weekend father", showing up when he doesn't need to, and NOT being there when he DOES need to.

This is essentially what happened when I was growing up- my dad decided he didn't want to be a dad after I was popped out onto this world. He shirked responsibility, he fought constantly with my mom, and felt no need to get employment so that there was food on the table. He even used me as a kind of "excuse" for sneaking out for some poontang with the whore-du-jour he was banging behind my mom's back with. And THEN he had the nerve to wonder why mom divorced and dumped ass on the street.

Fast forward thirty years and NOW my dad's sixty, he's old, and he's useless. His years of whoring around and not-paying-attention to business has left him in big trouble of the paternity lawsuit kind (won't go into that), and he NOW expects me to just walk in and take over his (albeit failing) business, among other things. He expects me to just "jump in", be the "good son", and face all the responsibility that should be HIS responsibility.

Heh. Yeah, right. When monkeys jump outta my ass.



This is why I'm a stauncher-than-staunch advocate of NOT HAVING ANY KIDS until both the mother and father are not only economically capable of doing so, but also emotionally responsible enough to be parents instead of playing the part.

If there is ANY DOUBT whatsoever about whether or not bringing in a child into a cold and heartless world as this will work, then the effort should simply not be made in the first place. All you're doing is bringing someone who will eventually feel that he/she has NO place in being here.


I wish you luck with your child and your situation. If you DO decide to raise him without the father's help, make sure he is NOWHERE near the kid. If he wants nothing to do with the child's development, then he deserves NO right to see the child.

You know......I left my son's dad, for reasons I wont talk about but I never took his father away from him. That being said......his father would show up every 5 years or so....sporadic........my son figured it out pretty quick. I never had to say a bad word about him.....he showed his true colours sooooooooooo..........

been there done that.. have 3 babes with the guy..

he doesnt change...

he will use the kids as "luxury items" show them off when it suits.. but then forget about them until it suits again..


heres the thing about that tho....


i never badmouth him in front of the kids.. wont let my mom... and wont let anyone else..
no matter what happened between us.. he is their father.. while i wont let him have them outa my sight.. and i wont see him without a "guard"
the kids already have picked up.. the oldest realized (from what he and his gf said) that he isnt her "real" dad.. so she avoids him like the plaugue.. and the next 2 only see him when they have to. and my 3rd one.. (hehe ya confuzed yet?) used to call for him when she cried.. now she calls for grandpa...
the baby has never realy known him so when he sees him.. he treats him like a stranger.. cuz he is...


the kids know.. its not a choice for you to make.. its a choice for them...



and they will make the right one i assure you...

That is very true. My dad has only been a dad when it's convenient for him. My mom did the same thing you did...wouldnt let anyone speak ill of him in our prescence. Nobody had to though...just seeing how he was hardly ever around, and how he acted when he was around was enough. My sister and I dont want anything to do with him...neither one of us even called him on Fathers Day...and my brother only speaks to him on occasion.