Do you know what Rodeo Sex is?

It's when you mount your woman from behind, start going nice and slowly, take her hair and pull her head back slightly and whisper in her ear "Your sister was better than you...", and try to hold on for 8 seconds

One day Mr. Smith, the president of a large corporation, called his vice-president, Dave, into his office and said, "We're making some cutbacks, so either Jack or Barbara will have to be laid off." Dave looked at Mr. Smith and said, "Barbara is my best worker, but Jack has a wife and three kids. I don't know whom to fire."

The next morning Dave waited for his employees to arrive. Barbara was the first to come in, so Dave said, "Barbara, I've got a problem. You see, I've got to lay you or Jack off and I don't know what to do?" Barbara replied, "You'd better jack off. I've got a headache."

A man and a woman started to have sex in the middle of a dark forest. After about 15 minutes of it, the man finally gets up and says, "Damn, I wish I had a flashlight!". The woman says, "Me too, you've been eating grass for the past ten minutes!"

This beautiful woman one day walks into a doctors office and the doctor is bowled over by how stunningly awesome she is. All his professionallism goes right out the window...

He tells her to take her pants, she does, and he starts rubbing her thighs.

"Do you know what I am doing?" asks the doctor?

"Yes, checking for abnormalities." she replies.

He tells her to take off her shirt and bra, she takes them off. The doctor begins rubbing her breasts and asks, "Do you know what I am doing now?", she replies, "Yes, checking for cancer."

Finally, he tells her to take off her panties, lays her on the table, gets on top of her and starts having sex with her. He says to her, "Do you know what I am doing now?"

She replies, "Yes, getting herpies - thats why I am here!"

The newlyweds are in their honeymoon room and the groom decides to let the bride know where she stands right from the start of the marriage.

He proceeds to take off his trousers and throw them at her. He says, "Put those on."

The bride replies, "I can't wear your trousers."

He replies, "And don't forget that! I will always wear the pants in the family!"

The bride takes off her panties and throws them at him with the same request, "Try those on!"

He replies,"I can't get into these!"

"And you never will if you don't change your attitude."

The newlyweds are in their honeymoon room and the groom decides to let the bride know where she stands right from the start of the marriage.

He proceeds to take off his trousers and throw them at her. He says, "Put those on."

The bride replies, "I can't wear your trousers."

He replies, "And don't forget that! I will always wear the pants in the family!"

The bride takes off her panties and throws them at him with the same request, "Try those on!"

He replies,"I can't get into these!"

"And you never will if you don't change your attitude."

A man and his wife go to their honeymoon hotel for their 25th anniversary. As the couple reflected on that magical evening 25 years ago, the wife asked the husband, "When you first saw my naked body in front of you, what was going through your mind?"

The husband replied, "All I wanted to do was to bang your brains out, and suck your boobs dry."

Then, as the wife undressed, she asked, "What are you thinking now?"

He replied, "It looks as if I did a pretty good job."

Welcome and have fun!

When I went to get my driver's license renewed, our local motor-vehicle bureau was packed. The line inched along for almost an hour until the man ahead of me finally got his license. He inspected his photo for a moment and commented to the clerk, "I was standing in line so long, I ended up looking pretty grouchy in this picture." The woman beside him peered over his shoulder, then reassured him, "It's okay. That's how you're going to look when the cops pull you over, anyway."

A Guy is driving his girlfriend home when she decides she wants to go to her friends instead. Her friend lives out of the way so she tells her boyfriend that she would get naked for him if he drove her. The guy wants some dirty fun and says ok and the girl takes off all her clothes. The boyfriend is so busy looking at her that he crashes the car and gets stuck between the steering wheel and the seat. He tells her to go get help and she replied that she couldn’t because she didn’t have any clothes on. He replies, “Take my shoe and cover your snatch with it, and go for help!

She takes the shoe and runs to the closest gas station. She finds the clerk and says, "Help, my boyfriend is stuck! Can you help us?" The clerk replies, "I’m sorry, I think he's too far in."

OH MY Now THAT is funny!

I try to anyway

I loved being a single parent. (two boys, one girl) so I had to go through all of the adolescence on both sides of the spectrum. I would'nt change a thing!

I raised my three as a single parent when thier mom decided to leave us. They drove me crazy, but also reminded me of who I am and why i'm here. I love them all very much and they tured out fine. one is married with children, one is starting a family and the youngest is starting college. I am very proud of them all. They helped me grow as an adult as much as I helped them grow into adults. Don't give up. The rewards are far to great!

mine are SLH, super laidback homeboy

Thanx and a toast to all!

well said ghost!

put in a few more photos and tell alittle more about yourself. It is also good to post alot in the forums. that is how you get feedback, and how you meet people.

I just got on this site yesterday and I must say it is by far one of the coolest places to me new and interesting people I have ever found. I love the forums and all of the valuable info. Plus I have had some great conversations! So this is Scooter saying: HELLO ALL!

keep your feet on the ground, the wind at your back, and keep reachin for the stars!