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Topic:
Well! Heidi-ho neighbor!
Edited by
MissB4ya
on
Sun 05/06/12 12:08 PM
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Yes!!
So let me tell you guys about my neighbor the creeper! He is an old hispanic man that literally rapes me with his eyes everytime we cross paths. I'm not even joking..this is what transpires: Me - Hey, how are you? *bracing for the awkwardness* Old creeper - *licking his old lips, eyes undressing me, heart palpitations* Oh..I'm good good....and so are you. Looking good...real good. 
Me - ...Thats....good. Bye now. 
My other neighbor is an older gay teddy bear (i say teddy bear because he isnt the average "bear" so to speak he isnt super hairy but he is big) that is in lust with my hot lil blue eyed boyfriend. He is always nice but never really perks up until he sees my man. His "partner" on the other hand is very nice..makes small talk. My neighbors next door is a 'would be' sweet lil family but one day i caught them in the elevator with their young daughters who proceeded to eye me suspiciously and whisper secrets which then provoked me to stick my tongue out at them while their parents weren't looking. So all in all i guess my neighbors are your average neighbors huh... |
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I got it...
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Topic:
Cinco de crappo......
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Would have been hilaaaarious!
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Introducing...........
FLOYD |
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Topic:
Cinco de crappo......
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Speaking of infomercials... Someone order me a Schticky! No, just use some duck tape, works just as well and it's a lot cheaper. I don't like your logic...I rather have the schticky. 
That's such a weird name for it though... I thought it said "Schitky" like **** Key? Idk, I'm out of it and loopy, sorry. I only want it cause the infomercial guy is the one that got arrested for being with prostitutes and at the end of the bit he says you can even use it in awkward situations... then they show him 'schticking' his shirt while posing for a mug shot. |
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I don't use em, but I've had a friend use this one and I laughed so hard I almost peed myself. Is that a mirror in your pocket, 'cause I can totally see myself in your pants. LoL I like that one too.. |
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Topic:
4am and can't sleep...
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LoL! Yea...I'm going to pass on the grilled cheese for awhile.
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Topic:
4am and can't sleep...
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Why don't old people have sex? Shoot |
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I haven't met my quota yet...
Can you be my 10th? |
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Topic:
4am and can't sleep...
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Standing by...
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Topic:
Cinco de crappo......
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Speaking of infomercials... Someone order me a Schticky! No, just use some duck tape, works just as well and it's a lot cheaper. I don't like your logic...I rather have the schticky.
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Topic:
4am and can't sleep...
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Lets take it back to grandma...
Warm milk and a nice....punch to the back of the head. |
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Topic:
4am and can't sleep...
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Pretty much...
Sex..drugs..skating.. Ahhh the good life. |
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Totz...
I can't figure out how to post a pic of him 
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Topic:
Cinco de crappo......
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Speaking of infomercials...
Someone order me a Schticky! |
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Topic:
4am and can't sleep...
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papers ? Put 50 down on a woman if you know where to find them in your area. Probation. And, uh, I'd rather not... I don't want my junk to fall off because of some weird disease. Besides, I have someone for that stuff. LoL! I like the "i have someone for that" ... kinda like... I have a connect for that. |
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Topic:
4am and can't sleep...
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Wait........
I wanna go fishing 
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Topic:
4am and can't sleep...
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I got it!!!
Go FISHING!! |
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Topic:
4am and can't sleep...
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Ive had a similar experiences honestly best way to fall asleep when you have such a problem ive found is to wear yourself out. Excercise till you have trouble standing, hot shower, party are all good. Never found benadryl to work for me. benadryl doesn't do chrap for me either, unless I eat like a sheet of it, but then I'm delirious AND exhausted, so that's probably worse... And did you not see the part of being out skating for ours? Dude, I can barely move, idk how I'm still up, but I am. Can't party, I'm on papers, and hot showers wake me up, not relax. Jack it....a nice thrilling "moment" with yourself..oooor if you have a playmate always does that job. |
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Topic:
Cinco de crappo......
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LoL Couldn't come up with a better topic...This is the 3rd consecutive Cinco de Mayo that has pretty much sucked arse. I overslept after i got off work today...now i'm bored. I'm sneezing my brains out..literally. I think brain matter is seeping from my nostrils. I'm watching an infomercial about these awesome curlers that are like sea shells or whatever and i kind of want them but if i order something from an infomercial i think that would seal the deal for me (as far as getting old) ... anyway..and i'm surrounded with tissues full of...boogers and brain matter. Hope that mental picture turned you on. Of course if you weren't turned on you wouldn't be reading this... I'm not even really sure what the point of this post is... Pod people...hmmm You ever have weird random thoughts? Obviously i do...Seriously though........ Pod people. Eek? Zombie apocalypse, crosses my mind all the time. And now I can kiss sleep good-bye because now my mind is racing with thoughts of pod people. Oh, and at least its coming out your nose, I've been sneezing out my lungs since spring started (it's worse with summer being here), and it always launches out my mouth. Gross. Oh, and yeah, quite the amazing visual there... Idk..I'm thinking pod people are a little more of a threat than zombies. I mean zombies you can tell if someone is a zombie or not....a pod person though...thats tricky. |
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