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Community > Posts By > Mitchell1221
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Topic:
Annoying People
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There`s a lot of annoying people in the world aren`t there?
Did you ever have a stranger start talking to you in public telling you stuff you didn`t want to know? I was sitting at McDonalds, and some lady leans over, " I shouldn`t be eating this greasy food, I have a spastic colon" THANK YOU, what a coincidence, I have an epileptic testicle. That`s what I should of said. |
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Topic:
You know what is weird?
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You know those magnifying makeup mirrors that women use, ever looked at one of those , men?
Yoooo, there`re made by Hubble. What do you need those for, no one looks at you that close. Ladies, by the time somebody`s looking at you that close, I think you`ve won them over. they`re on top of you. Another thing that is so weird, they make your nose look like Mount Everest, and yet they show your penis, actually size. |
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Topic:
Tornadoes
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The tornado in the Wizard of Oz scared me, you know what it turns out that was, a pair of panty hose.
Scared me worse than Twister, that Twister tornado got on my nerves. How come that tornado could tear a forty penny nail out of a two by twelve, but it couldnt get a bra and tank top off of Helen Hunt? That`s what I want to know. If there`s one thing I can`t stand, it`s a gay tornado. Out there chasing those Northern California tornadoes, that`s the problem. That wasn`t like a Versailles Kentucky tornado. A Versailles Kentucky would be like, No we going for the trailer, but Shelia`s going to be naked when we get there. There`s going to be food stamps flying. |
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Topic:
WHY?
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Why are there no girls called Clitoris?
When there are loads of guys called ****? |
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Topic:
WHY?
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why do pigeons crap on my car
when there are 300 others in the parking lot? |
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Topic:
WHY?
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Why don`t relationships last? I thought fifty dollars was for the whole night. |
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Topic:
WHY?
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Why don`t I trust my therapist?
Why does he sell Amway on the side? |
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Topic:
WHY?
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Why can`t we just love our neighbors?
Why must their husbands freak out? |
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Topic:
WHY?
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f a tree falls on a philosopher,
does he make a sound? |
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Topic:
WHY?
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Why does a confession booth
look so much like a peep show booth? |
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Topic:
WHY?
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Why was my graduation so embarrassing?
So I misunderstood the word, matriculate. |
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Topic:
WHY?
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Why doesn`t my wife understand me?
Maybe it`s because she`s holding a pillow over my face. |
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Topic:
WHY?
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Why can`t a man be naked
in the privacy of his own back yard on the trampoline? |
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Topic:
WHY?
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Why do people pick their nose in their cars?
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Topic:
Sex as a Weapon
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You would? just my luck. :(
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Topic:
WHY?
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Why can`t a man show a woman
how to breast feed properly? |
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Topic:
WHY?
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Why are hookers never on sale?
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Topic:
WHY?
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Why does hot water shrink clothes,
and cold water shrinks me? |
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Topic:
WHY?
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Why does love hurt?
Especially in jail? |
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Topic:
WHY?
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Why can`t I claim the IRS as a Dependant?
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