my problem isnt forgiving others.. its forgiving myself. i have a hard
time letting go of the things i either have done bad or things i think i
shouldn't of done

very touching

wow every moving

dreams come
dreams go
looking into the sky
wondering what to do
remembering her eyes
remembering her words
wanting for the smell of dreams to come

Alanis Morsettes version of My Humps

well im hoping that once i find a job i like and get situated in a post
school environment that ill ease into things

kids dont have to grow up as fast. they dont have friends that are ate
by wolfs at the age of 8.. nore are they working on the farm 8 hrs a day
atleast.. but ya.. kids were tougher back then

id like to do that...
but im just not the type to go all nuts and relive stress like that

ya i know it just seams that everything is flying like a rat on crank
now a days

ya we all are man
the last girl, i did everything i could to make her life better even
helped her find a part time job at school.. it ended up she met a guy
there and one thing comes to another their married and im bitter.

there is a person out there for everyone

at my college which had religious roots (i was there for a non religious
degree) they had weekly meetings for the students and had Christan
bands. alot of these people seamed to be rather more cheer leading for
god than doing anything about it. most of these people were also very
hated of people that lived lifes that they were not agreeing with. a
friend of mine had been going thur some depression problems and made a
remark about wanting to get drunk and some girl who we didn't even know
came up to us and started berating us about the idea. yes it wasn't the
smartest choice but it wasn't this persons place to get on their care
(me and my friends were taking care of him)..

ive gone thru some stuff in my past that has brought me closer to god
and i not understand that the hard paths ive had to take are for a
reason..

comes in with my rock and gets some coffee
hello

i'd be scared if i met a woman who was richer than me and she was
interested. mostly because she could always do better if she wanted than
me

yes thanks
listneing is nice
i dont hvae many friends where i live and tend to hide online alot

not really.. life is a struggle here for most of my family proably one
of the reasons im stressing.

id like to get off ym stress and depression but its kinda hard right
now. money is thin and gas money is hard to scrouge much less than money
to go to a doctor

i cant afford to go to a doctor right now

I wish i could go to the doc. i get chest pains and sometimes my stomach
is upset in the morning.. id also love to have a kitten but i dont think
its on my means right now. just need to pray and strive on

hmm i herd it was just vista
or is it just anything that is running ie

well i got problems with microsoot anyway. gates going on tv saying we
need to make our kids smarter in sciences then in the same sentence
saying he wants more open visa's for tech skilled wokers to come to
america (so he can hire them) is a disgrace