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Community > Posts By > Okoro David
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This Divorce of a thing is serious.
But i knw God's standered wnt change bcos of me or anybody. .............................................................. I have an Uncle who married and wedded with the woman. But they got no child. For many years. The wife even started blaming my uncle and calling him names..that his is importent. And back here...when couples cant get a baby of their own they dont get along. Most dont even like to adopt The woman got bad behaviours that made all of us the family members to stay away from her. And she doesnt like to come close to any of us either.. So after a while, my uncle met another woman and she became pregnant...my Uncle decided to take her as a second wife. My Dad as a pastor (the Elderst in the family) did not go to the ceremony...he maintained he dont have anything to do with marrying a second wife for my uncle. My uncle insisted and married her. She got her two children..(two galz) When the first wife noticed what has happened..she went and adopted a baby boy..without even consulting with her husband. It really caused problems..but later our family decided to forgive her and accept the baby. But we all are now in good terms with the second wife..shez a very good woman and works hard. Our family loves her. It happned that last year...when we attended a cross over night program... The man of God who preached Said "God showed him that there is a woman who was married into a family that another woman is occupying already". That God said she is not the rightfull wife. That its the first wife that is the real wife in the family. But luckly she did not attend the cross over night bcos she attend catholic church.... And when we heard this...Nobody wnt to make that move and tell her what God says concerning her stay in our family... Maybe because of what the outcome will be and moreover we dont wnt to loose her and my Uncle may think we are making things difficult for his family.. So we all kept quit... |
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CooL
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The debate about submissiveness within the context of marriage is always interesting. As a woman, when my life was less submitted to the LORD, I used to think it was so unfair and saw the instruction to women to submit as a license to men to maltreat their wives, in a growing terrible world. But I have realized that God does not ask for my opinion as to whether or not I should live in obedience to HIS word and HIS instructions. HIS standard is simply that I should obey HIM - period! So, for the woman, the obedience is unto God, whether the husband deserves it or not. And it does not matter even if that 'husband' in the woman's own eyes is un-deserving of obedience or submissiveness. It is God's instruction! That instruction must be obeyed! And for men who have battles securing submissiveness from their wives - hear me out please. A woman who is truly loved by her husband hardly has problems submitting to or obeying that husband! In law, we say that for every general rule, there is an exception. So there may be exceptional cases but in general, show me that woman who is loved and respected by her husband and I will tell you, that woman would submit to that husband and hate to disobey him. Men...please realize that your responsibility here is much greater than that of the woman. It is to love your wife as Christ loved the Church and gave His life for the Church. That is the standard of love that God requires of a husband. The husband must love his wife enough to be prepared to lay down his life for her. I see men stressing submissiveness all the time and leaving out to talk about the husband's duties. God will help both men and women to live right for HIM at all times and within the context of marriage. Amen! you have said it all dear..God bless you |
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Why do I get the feeling that the OP has an obsession with power and control? sorry dear, you got it wrong. I wrote not bcouse of me but becouse of what i wittnessed and what is happening in different homes. (remember here we are talking about Christianity) |
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CONVERSATION BETWEEN A GIRL AND THE FATHER.
Kate: Daddy, did you remember teling me that, when a man get ontop of me, he is digracing my family? FATHER: Yeah, gud girl, i know you don't forget easily...so continue.. Kate: Last night when i went to Akpors' house. He tried getting ontop of me while on the bed, bt i refused. Father: That's my girl. I knw u will never disappoint me, so what happened next? Kate: I got ontop of him instead, and i disgraced his family.... |
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Akpors got to school on monday
morning and the Teacher Asked: why did you come late to school? Akpors: "one man lost #1,000 Note at the bus stop. Teacher: Oh! dat's Gud of you, were you helping him to look for the money? Akpors: NO Sir!!! Im not CRAZy. i was standing on it.....!!! |
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Akpors walked into class with a red eye.
Teacher: what's wrong? Akpors: My house is very small. I, my Mum and my Dad sleep on the same bed. Every night, my dad asks,"Akpors are u sleeping?" I replied No and he slaps my face and calls me stupid boy. Teacher: Tonight when ur dad asks again, keep dead quiet and dont answer. The following morning, Akpors comes back worser than he was the other day eye. Teacher: My goodness! Why all these again??? Akpors: Dad asked me again, Akpors are you sleeping?& i shut up and kept dead still. Then my Dad and my Mum started moving, you know, at the same time mum was breathing erratically, kicking her legs up frantically and squealing like a hyena on the bed. Then my dad asked my mum, "are u cuming?" Mum said, "yes, i'm cuming, r u cuming too?" Dad answered, "yes." They dont usually go anywhere without me so i said, "wait for me, I'm also coming!" |
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Akpors Goes To Court!
Akpors and his wife were in court for divorce, the problem is who gets custody for the child! The wife.... Jumps up n says, ur honour i brought the child into this world in pains and labour,he should be in my custody. The judge turns to Akpors and asked what he has to say? Akpors: (calmly) "Your honour,if i put my ATM card into ATM machine and Cash comes out. Whose cash is it? THE MACHINE OR MINE? |
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Akprs Vs Daddy
Akpos' father believed that his son was spending way too much time playing computer games. In an effort to motivate the boy into focusing more attention on his school work, the father said to his son Akpos... "When Abe Lincoln was your age, he was studying books by the light of the fire place." Without looking up from his game, Akpors pointed out,"Thanks Dad, But When Lincoln was your age, he was The President of The United States." |
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Akpors VS Wife
WIFE: I wrote your name on sand it got washed. I wrote your name in air, it was blown away. Then I wrote your name on my heart & I got Heart Attack. AKPOS: God saw me hungry, he created pizza. He saw me thirsty, He created Pepsi. He saw me in darkness, He created light. He saw me without problems, He created YOU. WIFE:.. Twinkle twinkle little star You should know what you are .. And once you know what you are Mental hospital is not so far. AKPOS: The rain makes all things beautiful. The grass and flowers too. If rain makes all things beautiful Why doesn't it rain on you..? WIFE: ...Roses are red; Violets are blue. Monkeys like u should be kept in ZOO. Don't feel so angry you will find me there too... Not in cage but laughing at YOU WHO KILLED IT? The wife or the husband? |
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Akpors made Yahoo guy/Scammer to confess.
Akpos: Hello? Who am I speaking with Pls? Yahoo boy: Ah, don't u know who is calling? Akpos: No I don't, the number is restricted. Yahoo boy: How is Nigeria? Akpos: Nigeria is fine but who am I speaking with? Yahoo boy: It's your friend from London. Akpos: I have a couple of friends in London which of them is this? Yahoo boy: Just guess. Akpos: Em, is it James? Yahoo boy: Yes! It's me James! Akpos: Ah! James! Long time no see, how now? How is London? Yahoo boy: London is fine, how is Nigeria? Akpos: Nigeria is fine, the usual wahala, Ehen! The other day I saw your mother , she is very sick o, dat was two weeks ago, I am sure she should be dead by now.... Yahoo boy: Ah! Akpos: Yes o, your father's house in the village rainstorm blew away the roof and it landed on the old mans legs and shattered them, he is at the hospital presently ...... Yahoo boy: Jesus:O! Akpos: ....yes o, the bone mender says it will not heal because he has diabetes, later they said tetanus has entered already, the man is quarter to go, your younger brother went to smoke Weed with those bad boys and since then the guy is mad, he is in psychiatric now, your elder brother went to a burial at a neighbouring village he went to drink anyhow there, they put poison in his wine, he is just falling every time ..... Yahoo boy: Haaaaa!!!!! OMG! Akpos: ...wait o, there is more, your sister got pregnant and wnted to do abortion .... Yahoo boy: You wait! Its enough already! I reject everything you say in Jesus name! Those things will never happen to me.... Akpos: Ah! Is this not James?, they have already happened ... Yahoo boy: I am not James, im a yahoo guy/Scammer..so im not james plz.. Akpos: Oh, i see. You stupid yahoo guy. Dnt go find work bloody thief! ..wait let me burn your credit small, *****lolz...try this if you meet one on your way out! |
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Akpors and his new teacher.
A new teacher tries to make use of her psychology courses. The first day of class, she starts by saying, "Everyone who thinks they're stupid, stand up!" After a few seconds, Akpos stands up. The teacher asks, "Do you think you're stupid, Akpos?" "No, madam, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself." |
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True Confession By Akpos
I was a Candidate at a JAMB Examination. We were writing Use Of English. I shaded the ones i knew and was waiting for manna to fall from Heaven when i noticed a very beautiful girl sitting beside me. She was shading and was not looking up. Through the help of my long neck, i peeped and checked her work, she was on number 65, i was still on number 21 and time was running out. I quickly thanked God and started shading along with her. We got to number 98 together, suddenly, she looked up, caught me and shouted in a low tone: "What are it? Why is you dey copying me? Copys! copys! You is not shaming! As big as you dey! You is a dull boys! You are a disgrace to your manhoods." and i shouted; "heeeey! heeeeyyy!!! heeeyyyy!!! I am finished here, who has eraser ee!!!!!!! ** ! Bad Market....." |
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Chichi: Hw much do u luv me?
Akpos: My heart is a mobile &you are its SIM. Chichi: Oh God.I am so lucky. Akpos: she doesn't knw dat my mobile is dual sim .......................................... In a party Akpos Asked a Girl "Are you Going to Dance?" She felt so happy amd said-yes. Akpos Said-"That's Gud, So Can I have your Chair? Akpos asked a barber “How much for a haircut?” Barber:“N500. Akpos:“And hw much 4 a shave? Barber:N50 sir. Akpos: Very well, shave my head. ................................................. Teacher: Akpos, assuming you were at a bus stop and Boko- Haram throws a bomb. What will you do? Akpors: i will just stop assuming….. ................................................ TEACHER: If I have 6 bottles in one hand & 5 in the other, what do I have?.. AKPOS: A drinking problem ....................................................... OCHUKO: Akpos, why do u keep saying 'Good Morning Sir' to the mirror?.. AKPOS: Last night, My Wife told me to respect myself ........................................................... Spelling Mistake Destroy Akpos Life, Akpos Sent this to His Wife "i'm Having a Wonderful Time, Wish you Were HER". Retweet if u get it! .............................................. Akpors Wife: Honey, where are you going with a Spanner?.. AKPOS: To the Bank, I want to open an Account |
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In an English exam, an Essay asked 'What is
laziness'?.. Akpos left 6 pages blank & wrote in the end –THIS IS LAZINESS ............................................... DOC AKPOS: U look terribly exhausted, re u having meals 3 times a day as I advised?.. EKAETTE: Doctor, I thought u said 3 males a day ........................................... Doctor: Do u do enough exercise?.. AKPOS: yes, I play Futball & Tennis daily.. Doctor: how long do u play?.. AKPOS: Until my Phone Battery empties ..................................................... OCHUKO: 2day's my GF's birth day, what Gift can I give her?.. AKPOS: how does she look?.. OCHUKO: Gorgeous & sexy.. AKPOS: Give her my number |
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Edited by
Okoro David
on
Tue 03/03/15 05:53 AM
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Man Dave, You have written some 50+ jokes this week. Ok, Now imagine you take all of them jokes and squeeze it into a can. Now shake the can and tell me what sound you hear? sincerely, JaiGi thanks alot Sir. Will always try to squeez and make it very short and as simple as possible. |
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AKPORS was mentally sick and was taken to a psychiatrist.
After a long time the doctors decided to put all the patients to a test to knw who has recovered. They project a shadow that looks like a door on a concrete wall. And all the patients started to run towards it..trying to escape... But Akpors didnt move. He was still sitting down. The Doctors concluded Akpors has recovered... Doctor: Akpors why aint you running to that door like others? Akpors: I have the key to that door..let them keep running..when they r all tired..i will go and open it. Whoz case is worser? |
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Edited by
Okoro David
on
Tue 03/03/15 02:39 AM
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TEACHER: What is the opposite of Ma?..
AKPOS:Sir.. TEACHER: Good, so what is the opposite of Madam?.. AKPOS: Simple, it is SIRdam ................................................................... INTERVIEWER: Mr Akpos, where can you see yourself in 10 years?.. AKPOS: A mirror ................................................................... OCHUKO: Nice phone. Where did u buy it?.. AKPOS: I won it in a race.. OCHUKO: Which race?.. AKPOS: Me, the phone owner & the Police ........................................................................ TEACHER: Why did u bring a rope to the Examhall?.. AKPOS: My dad told me to SKIP the questions I don't know ........................................................................ TEACHER: What are the 3 fastest ways of Communication.. AKPOS: Television, Telephone & Tell-a-Woman ........................................................................ That's how AKPOS was asked to come for a Party with his DATE, Akpos went there with a CALENDAR ........................................................................ TEACHER: If someone from Lagos is a Lagosian, what is someone from Moscow called?.. AKPOS: A Mosquito ......................................................................... TEACHER: Angrily called Akpors daddy on phone because Akpors cant spell "LION". AKPORS DADDY: aaarh.."LION" is hard now...you would have asked him to spell small animals like "MOSQUITO" |
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Look wee man, no c**t cares about this Akpors guy, ok? Whoever told you that you were a comedian, were lying, cos you're as funny as a kick in the baws with a pair of steel-toecapped boots, believe me! ok |
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A rich man's son who was classmate to
Akpors told him dat most adults are hiding at least one dark secret & dat this makes it very easy to blackmail them by saying,"I know the whole truth." So Akpors decided to go home & try it out. He got home & as he is greeted by his mother he said,"Mama, I know the whole truth." His mother quickly hands him N500 & said,"Just dont tell your father." Q...uite pleased, he waited for his father to get home from work & on arrival his greeting to His father was"Papa, I know the whole truth"His father quickly took him aside & gave him N1000 saying"just don't tell ur mother" wow! Amazed by dis, he ran out to meet d gate man saying"I know the whole truth"d gate man quickly dropped d padlock & embraced him really tight n said" thank God you finally discovered im your father.....!! Akpors fainted!!!! |
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