A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband at the front door. "Hurry!" she said, "stand in the corner." She quickly rubbed oil over him and dusted him with talcum powder.

"Don't move until I tell you to", she whispered. "Just pretend you're a statue."

"What's this, honey?" the husband asked.

"Oh, it's just a statue," she replied nonchalantly. "The Smiths bought one. I liked it, so got one for us too."

No more was said and after a while they went to their bed and slept.

At two in the morning, the husband went to the kitchen and returned with a sandwich and some milk. "Here," he said to the 'statue', "eat this. I stood like an idiot at the Smiths' for two days and nobody even offered me water."