i would never buy that someone can't help themselves. it's always your life and your choice.

if you feel compelled to cheat, either work out your current relationship or ditch it and go off to have your fun. it's selfish to cheat.

Thanks for your opinions! After reading through it brings to mind another question:

Does it make a difference if the cheater was a male or female?

Are women more/less likely to be repeat offenders? (and vice versa?)

I was thinking about one guy in particular, a friend's boyfriend, it seemed like he was a compulsive cheater. No matter what was at risk or how many times he got caught he kept doing it. That seems almost like a sickness to me. He pretty much lost everything, and for what?

oh, let's not go there. The men will say one thing, the women another, we will all fight- it's not worth it.

The answer is "no difference"

i'm not sure... but i do know that males often use the cop out that it's their nature.

i've known cheaters on either side. honestly, in my experience most females have done it out of spite. while a male is doing it for conquest or to fulfill his sex "needs".


again...just my experience and things i've witnessed

.....If I'm talking with someone new, and I tell you (the truth), "No, never have, never would.", do you believe it? It's almost wasted effort to even worry about it. Who's really gonna be so up front as to even imply, "Yeah, I was the cheater", to someone they're interested in, anyway? I think I'd rather not even know............

you need to start watching different movies dude!

sadly, not movies. i've known people who are just walking stereotypes.

such a wonderful point. Same as "no game players"..like the game players are gonna say - darn, she doesn't want game players. No one self-identifies as a lout.

I know, just funning you.

I have seen both - the stereotypes and the unique situations. This is why I hate to generalize about anyone.

i've also known more males to cheat..

So what I'm hearing is "If you cheated don't say anything" and "If they say they didn't cheat, don't believe them?"

So it's basically a pointless topic.

If you ever cheated and you were talking to someone and getting to really like them, would you ever answer a question like that honestly? would you ever feel compelled to tell them before they asked?

what it sounds like to me is that honesty is best, but you might have to deal with negativity due to your actions. it's all part of the experience, all part of your reward for being so faithful..


i dunno...

But it's everywhere. Men cheat, and it's just "sowing their oats" or some B.S. conquest to their friends. We see a woman do the same thing, and immediately want to believe she's a "tramp", or worse. man or woman, it's all the same!!
Cheaters suck!

I tell you, "No, I never have", I'm being honest, but do you believe me?

the last time I was in love - it would never have occurred to me to cheat..never in a million years..he was pretty much my world..

of course, he was married to someone else.

I'm saying that some people out there are inherently wired to not be faithful to one mate. They feel an overwhelming need to attain human contact (sex) in any way possible, even if it means NOT having it with said mate. And yes- they're probably doomed to repeat themselves at a later date.

I'm also saying that it probably is more-than-difficult to regain any trust or redemption after making such a mistake, especially if one is a habitual adulterer. The only exception would be if that

- the cheating really was a one-time thing, and
- the person being cheated on is so tolerant as to overlook such a transgression.

Unfortunately, cheating on a mate is pretty serious business, no matter how you look at it.

As a person who witnessed and experienced what adultery can do to a family as a child (my father did so early in my childhood in several occasions), it's not something that can simply be brushed under a table or sofa.

It's a main reason for why I'm so adamant against cheating and adultery in a relationship. It probably also explains why I'm still single at 35, as well.

an honest women of courage that speak the truth happiness cannot resist......smiles

what he said.

Ok fair enough. I have no sympathy for the habitual cheater. Just the poor idiot who makes that tragic mistake and regrets it.