Community > General Discussion

Topic: To Date or Not to Date.
SuzinVA Joined Wed 04/25/07 Posts: 28730	Tue 03/04/08 05:39 AM
duct tape the little b@st@rds and put them in the closet and it'll all go smoothly JT, that's sick

Lily0923 Joined Sun 12/02/07 Posts: 20429	Tue 03/04/08 05:39 AM
I'm picky, I broke up with a guy because he couldn't control his heathen children....and I'm a heathen... If you let your kids walk all over you, or your kids are the poster children for birth control.... I won't date you, no matter how incredible, amazing, or fantastic you might be. If you can't control your children it says alot about you as a person. Kids are kids and they do kid stuff and get into kid trouble, but if they are whinnney, and just plain out bad kids... you arn't the man for me. The guy I dated and broke up with, was the most amazing man I have ever been in love with in my whole life, but his daughter was the spawn of satan.... He let her get away with murder because he didn't want to dicipline her, her mom had died of canser and he allowed bad behavior to "compensate" for not having a mom..... It's our job as parents to make our children, well behaved, well adjusted children that will some day become adults.... So do I date men with kids.... very selectively...

hottpinkilicious Joined Fri 10/26/07 Posts: 552	Tue 03/04/08 06:06 AM
it really kind of depends on how old the kids are and how well she is raising them. i mean, on paper, it all seems like peaches and cream, like the best case scenario being you could even be this psuedo family and a surrogate parent. the reality is you could get stuck having to deal with this bratty kid in order to see your gf. imagine getting hot and heavy with your girl and getting right up to the injection when you hear a knock at the door. it little Tommy and not only did he poop his pants, but he's scared and wants to sleep in mommy's bed now. mood killers from hell. OR maybe the kid has a problem with you getting mom's attention and takes any oppurtunity to kill your moods on purpose. OR maybe that whole psuedo family/surrogate dad thing can get pushed on you and you find yourself buying kid clothes and driving this woman's kid to school at 8 in the morning everyday. this kind of thing isnt always the case, but its a definite possibility. the kid is not going away and takes precedence every time. keep that in mind. Gee....you sound like you have a lot of experience being a selfish little child. grow up!

davo3 Joined Tue 01/09/07 Posts: 146	Tue 03/04/08 06:12 AM
youre damn right im selfish. i want a woman all to myself. i want uninterrupted sex. i want to watch movies, not cartoons. i want to not smell poop when i go to their houses. if this makes me immature, then ground me because i dont think i'm being unreasonable. i love kids, and im really good with them. but when i want to deal with one on a full time basis, i'll have one of my own.

SuzinVA Joined Wed 04/25/07 Posts: 28730	Tue 03/04/08 06:15 AM
youre damn right im selfish. i want a woman all to myself. i want uninterrupted sex. i want to watch movies, not cartoons. i want to not smell poop when i go to their houses. if this makes me immature, then ground me because i dont think i'm being unreasonable. i love kids, and im really good with them. but when i want to deal with one on a full time basis, i'll have one of my own. See, I think it's good that you know this about yourself. So many people don't or they think there's something wrong with admitting it and all it does is cause a lot of heartbreak.

Lily0923 Joined Sun 12/02/07 Posts: 20429	Tue 03/04/08 06:18 AM
youre damn right im selfish. i want a woman all to myself. i want uninterrupted sex. i want to watch movies, not cartoons. i want to not smell poop when i go to their houses. if this makes me immature, then ground me because i dont think i'm being unreasonable. i love kids, and im really good with them. but when i want to deal with one on a full time basis, i'll have one of my own. See, I think it's good that you know this about yourself. So many people don't or they think there's something wrong with admitting it and all it does is cause a lot of heartbreak. Know thy self......

shoes4rhon Joined Sat 02/02/08 Posts: 3411	Tue 03/04/08 06:18 AM
I don't think that someone that does not have kids should feel bad if they chose to not date folks with kids ..

LexFonteyne Joined Thu 12/07/06 Posts: 32131	Tue 03/04/08 06:22 AM
Your thoughts on dating people with kids...? Tried it when I was younger, and found out that it doesn't work for me. I have 3 absolute non-negotiables, and "no kids" is one of them.

SuzinVA Joined Wed 04/25/07 Posts: 28730	Tue 03/04/08 06:23 AM
I don't think that someone that does not have kids should feel bad if they chose to not date folks with kids .. I don't either, I think it's a choice. What I think is bad is when someone doesn't like or want kids but dates someone with kids anyway. That's selfish.

CHEFRON Joined Thu 01/31/08 Posts: 524	Tue 03/04/08 07:31 AM
WELL I HAVE TO GIVE MY INPUT ON THIS ONE" I HAVE KIDS TWO GIRLS FIRST ONE IS 18 & SECOND ONE IS 7, NOW I DON'T SEE A PROBLEM WITH DATEING PEOPLE WITH KIDS AT ALL, I THINK PEOPLE THAT HAVE A PROBLEM WITH THIS ARE VERY SELFISH & SELF EXSORBED" ALSO FEEL THAT PEOPLE WITH KIDS ARE GENARALY MORE LOVEING & COMPASTIONNATE.........

Lily0923 Joined Sun 12/02/07 Posts: 20429	Tue 03/04/08 07:52 AM
WELL I HAVE TO GIVE MY INPUT ON THIS ONE" I HAVE KIDS TWO GIRLS FIRST ONE IS 18 & SECOND ONE IS 7, NOW I DON'T SEE A PROBLEM WITH DATEING PEOPLE WITH KIDS AT ALL, I THINK PEOPLE THAT HAVE A PROBLEM WITH THIS ARE VERY SELFISH & SELF EXSORBED" ALSO FEEL THAT PEOPLE WITH KIDS ARE GENARALY MORE LOVEING & COMPASTIONNATE......... What's wrong with being selfish and self absorbed... if you are honest about it.... example... I know that I only am willing to give up about one to two nights a week to a relationship... I have friends that need to stay just my friends, and I am not willing to give up my "me" time with them, so knowing that.... I chose a mate that will accomodate that... how is that wrong? It's selfish, that I am unwilling to compromise on that point... but if I am upfront about it in a relationship... how is that wrong? I think the only time there is isse with selfishness, is when the person was either deceptive about it, or they change horses in mid stream and become selfish after setting a presidence of what is expected.... Be selfish... just be honest about it.

HJFinAZ Joined Mon 12/10/07 Posts: 193	Tue 03/04/08 07:57 AM
I have a daughter and two grandkids, so no kids no me 2 daughters, one son, three grandkids. I has done raised alls I is a gonna raise..

wiley Joined Thu 12/13/07 Posts: 19738	Tue 03/04/08 07:58 AM
No problem with kids. They better get along with my dog though.

TwoTallOne Joined Thu 01/04/07 Posts: 16854	Tue 03/04/08 08:02 AM
WELL I HAVE TO GIVE MY INPUT ON THIS ONE" I HAVE KIDS TWO GIRLS FIRST ONE IS 18 & SECOND ONE IS 7, NOW I DON'T SEE A PROBLEM WITH DATEING PEOPLE WITH KIDS AT ALL, I THINK PEOPLE THAT HAVE A PROBLEM WITH THIS ARE VERY SELFISH & SELF EXSORBED" ALSO FEEL THAT PEOPLE WITH KIDS ARE GENARALY MORE LOVEING & COMPASTIONNATE......... What's wrong with being selfish and self absorbed... if you are honest about it.... example... I know that I only am willing to give up about one to two nights a week to a relationship... I have friends that need to stay just my friends, and I am not willing to give up my "me" time with them, so knowing that.... I chose a mate that will accomodate that... how is that wrong? It's selfish, that I am unwilling to compromise on that point... but if I am upfront about it in a relationship... how is that wrong? I think the only time there is isse with selfishness, is when the person was either deceptive about it, or they change horses in mid stream and become selfish after setting a presidence of what is expected.... Be selfish... just be honest about it. I agree wholeheartedly ... being selfish is NOT the issue when dating , or forming a relationship with the parent of children... its the SWITCHIN steps mid stream, that ruin it for me ... being the father of 2 , I also had only a limited ammount of "free time " .. and she was fine with it , for the first year .. then " I suddenly changed" and had NO time for her ... so .. my point is , be honest, be open , and be yourself .. ALWAYS

sounditout Joined Mon 02/04/08 Posts: 307	Tue 03/04/08 05:06 PM
my experience... no. I cant really write my reasons without offending someone, but its never going to be the same as if it was your kid. Somethings just cant be fixed when broken.

PATSFAN Joined Mon 12/10/07 Posts: 42782	Tue 03/04/08 05:07 PM
I never have, so I'm not sure....

cutelildevilsmom Joined Sat 04/07/07 Posts: 8862	Tue 03/04/08 05:08 PM
duct tape the little b@st@rds and put them in the closet and it'll all go smoothly my little bastard would duck tape you..

Brenda_Darling Joined Wed 12/05/07 Posts: 3696	Tue 03/04/08 05:12 PM
I love kids..and they should be first in my other's life...a few of the guys i'm talking to have kids..and the way they take care of them makes me like them sooo much more..

Cambolaya65 Joined Mon 09/03/07 Posts: 5587	Tue 03/04/08 05:15 PM
It depends.....no/maybe......ok..no.....wait maybe.......

AllSmilesInTulsa Joined Mon 05/28/07 Posts: 1903	Tue 03/04/08 05:21 PM Edited by AllSmilesInTulsa on Tue 03/04/08 05:25 PM
Your thoughts on dating people with kids...? Tried it when I was younger, and found out that it doesn't work for me. I have 3 absolute non-negotiables, and "no kids" is one of them. I agree. I love my (grown) children but I don't want to date someone that has small children. If they have small children, the children should come first. I have a demanding career and my time is limited. Planning around visitation or always taking a back seat to the kids is not for me.