My Wife and kids are upset because I put ginger in their curry
..They loved that cat...

The guy at the furniture shop told me the sofa would seat 5 people without any problems.
Then it occurred to me that I don't think I know five people without problem.



A beer does not make you fat. It makes you lean. Against bars, tables, chairs, and walls.


My dog bit my wife.................... so I had to put her down...oooh

I just saw a car being driven by a lamb in a swimsuit........ it was a lamb bikini

One big difference between men and women is that if a woman says smell this,
and it is usually a nice smell


I've just burned 3000 calories. That's the last time I leave the brownies in the oven while I take a short nap.

I'm done with the dating apps . I would much rather meet the old fashion way, through tequila and poor judgement

Funny .