Because if you're not on top the view never changes.

Of course.
It's natural.
"Comfort" only really comes after a process of determining comparative social hierarchy. Group forming and norming.


It would help to be more specific.

I mean there are some things that one person may think the other is "competing" about but they really aren't.

Like those sometimes labeled as "one uppers."
If you share something and then they come up with something "worse," it might not actually be about "one upping" your experience so much as trying to empathize and communicate something you have in common so are similar.

It may still be "competing" but they may actually be trying to cooperate with you, competing with everyone else to show you they have more in common with you than someone else (or possibly just trying to adhere to perceived group rules).

Some people are competitive.
Some people are insecure and look for competition where it really isn't.
Sometimes it's a combination.
Sometimes it's a failure in communication.
Sometimes "competition" can actually help in developing a relationship and communication.


It should be (among many other things) both competitive and cooperative.
Both offer levels of feedback and knowledge and opportunity.
But like anything else, it can be taken to an unhealthy degree.

A specific situation would be better for discussion, IMO.

Life is competition. We compete for; mates, food, living space, recognition, and the adulation of our peers and "betters". It's the human condition. It's what wars are fought over. We are a load of crabs fighting to get to the top of the bucket.

not me mowtown i'm competing for a smaller bucket

yes we all compete.
both sexes and both sexes with the other

but we as humans(and our token melmican)can and do also cooperate at the same time

Yes, I have noticed it, here too, and elsewhere.
Competition can be healthy though, especially for guys, as long as it has a sense of camaraderie. Like what you have in sports.
There's friendly competition and more nasty type.
For women it's more important to learn sisterhood again, yet most women are god-awfully competitive.

I don't consider myself competitive, least not on a conscious level. I tend to back away when anything turns into a competition.

me too, river

I participate in games to have fun not to compete... so I tell myself

I won't compete for anyone's love.. either they love me as I am or they don't.

I don't compete with my partner but work together for a common goal.

I haven't noticed anyone competition with me, but I'm below the cement basement floor and really icky looking, and absolutely ridiculously stupid, so I'm not any kind of threat.

If your not first your last

*Shake and bake*

But you are lovely like that, you can tell it is not in your nature to be "catty".

Thank you, I can tell it's not in your nature either.

I fully agree with you sister lol.

I never did get this thing called "sisterhood".

I'm not competitive in the slightest, in fact I'm an expert at non-competitiveness.