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Topic: i think i screwed up......
Amberdee29045's photo
Sat 12/08/07 06:36 PM
ok, i left my ex 2 months ago because of his drinking.........he wrote me two weeks later and i just sent a letter back to him explaining why i left and won't come back...................here's the thing, i told him in the letter that i still love him..........did i just screw up?

he told me in his letter to me that he can't stip thinking bout me either..........

is this normal to miss something that was good for nearly 3 and 1/2 years after 2 months?

wmyers4u's photo
Sat 12/08/07 06:39 PM

ok, i left my ex 2 months ago because of his drinking.........he wrote me two weeks later and i just sent a letter back to him explaining why i left and won't come back...................here's the thing, i told him in the letter that i still love him..........did i just screw up?

he told me in his letter to me that he can't stip thinking bout me either..........

is this normal to miss something that was good for nearly 3 and 1/2 years after 2 months?


its only normal if you are human.

no photo
Sat 12/08/07 06:39 PM
Yeah, I think it's pretty normal, and normal to still love him. But, you left for a reason and if that reason still exists, well, only you can say for sure whether you can and want to deal with it or not. Good luck to you flowerforyou flowerforyou

Totage's photo
Sat 12/08/07 06:39 PM
If you have a problem with his drinking and he hasn't stopped drinking, don't get back together with him. I don't think you screwed up by telling him how you feel, just don't get back together with him.

BrittneyLynnell's photo
Sat 12/08/07 06:40 PM
No you didnt screw up....you cant control what your heart feels and your heart still loves him. But I do believe you did the right thing.

iRon's photo
Sat 12/08/07 06:42 PM
hell yeah its normal but good job to you for standing up for yourself........

The right thing may not seem easy at the time but in the long run it is always the best thing to do.

giocluedart's photo
Sat 12/08/07 06:43 PM
it's unfortunately going to hurt a lot longer than that...even without contact...3 1/2 years is a while.

angelsrevenge83's photo
Sat 12/08/07 06:45 PM
if u still love him u still love him....... but that dont mean u cant stand ur ground on the drinking thing. if thats what it takes for him to be about to keep u in his life then he has to change that but then again its u that would have to choose to trust him on that one or not. love just dotn fade away really fast unless it was never love at all...... keep ur head high and u didnt mess up

MicheleNC's photo
Sat 12/08/07 06:46 PM
Yes, it is so normal.

No, you did not screw up.

If you don't see it ever working out, don't play with his affections. True love does not go away, but true love does not mean you will be with that person forever.

Hugs, M

AutumnGirl76's photo
Sat 12/08/07 06:48 PM
Don't kick yourself over it...it's only natural to still care about him!
I won't tell you what to do, of course, but be real sure that you know what YOU want or need before you talk to him again...for both your sakes.
S

Amberdee29045's photo
Sat 12/08/07 06:49 PM
it's not like i could just jump and go back, i have no car and moved out of state..........my father (who i am staying with for now) doesn't want me to talk to him AT ALL......he doesn't know i sent that letter...........i don't miss the drunken man in him, i miss the man that took care of me while i had several nervous breakdowns after losing custody of my daughterohwell

no photo
Sat 12/08/07 06:49 PM
If you were deeply in love for 3.5 years, then it will take a lot longer than a couple of months to completely move on emotionally. In some cases, it could also require seeking profession help (therapy). As a result, it is natural for you to have feelings for him. Having said that, being drunk or high on drugs is being detached, therefore, it is never a good quality for a relationship, because one person is off somewhere while other is left in the relationship.

wmyers4u's photo
Sat 12/08/07 06:49 PM
love hurts..just don't start drinking over it:)

Leecy_Marie's photo
Sat 12/08/07 06:57 PM
I left my ex for the same reason and like you I loved him for a while afterwards. Its hard but just stay strong. No one but them can make them change and you can just get hurt trying. I wish you luck and can only say that it does get easier. If you need someone to talk to Im here for you.flowerforyou

pennyg281's photo
Sat 12/08/07 06:58 PM
you didn't screw up, it's totally understandable that yo still love him. But be strong,don't forget why you left. May that will change and you can be with him again, IF that is what YOU want. Take Care,flowerforyou Penny

LacAnn's photo
Sat 12/08/07 06:58 PM
It is very healthy to still have feelings, theres no way you wouldn't when you had invested and experience so much with someone

no photo
Sat 12/08/07 07:00 PM
I was with a guy for 6 yrs., thought we would be together until the end. He is an alcoholic, very verbably abusive...I left his world 1 1/2 yrs. ago and told him I loved him but could not/would not compete with his 'other love'. I told him if he could get sober and stay that way for a year, I may consider coming back to him...but this change had to come about for himself, not for me. He didn't love me enough. I love myself too much for him to take me down with him...life goes on! flowerforyou

LacAnn's photo
Sat 12/08/07 07:02 PM
Very sad:cry:

beccakatisonly1's photo
Sat 12/08/07 07:09 PM

ok, i left my ex 2 months ago because of his drinking.........he wrote me two weeks later and i just sent a letter back to him explaining why i left and won't come back...................here's the thing, i told him in the letter that i still love him..........did i just screw up?

he told me in his letter to me that he can't stip thinking bout me either..........

is this normal to miss something that was good for nearly 3 and 1/2 years after 2 months?


no you didn't screw up. I would advise you to be his friend..and that's it..and encourage him (without nagging) to get sober.

yes it is normal to miss someone you love, even if it's 10 yrs down the line..they will always have a place in your heart.

no photo
Sat 12/08/07 07:10 PM
you didn't screw up, but you should have tried 2 help him. never giving up on the one's you love are the best kinds of test 2 see if relationships will make it.

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