I'm currently dating this awesome girl, everytime we go out its never a dull moment and we always find ways to make each other laugh and just have a good time. Here comes the delima.. I've been divorced for almost a yr and i'm kinda nervous about commitment.. This girl i've been seeing got out of a 5yr relationship with a dirtbag in my opinion last yr, but was seeing him off and on till about july of this yr for sex. I met this girl 12th of October and we've been seeing each other for about 3 months and just recently she told me that she is not ready for a relationship right now, I told her that I didn't think I was either, but I wanted to be friends and still date and down the road who knows. She really likes me and I really like her and I really want to be with her, but I have some things to take care of first and so does she. She also told me she still has feelings for her ex-boyfriend... I've not found a girl yet that is like this girl, she is truely amazing and I would do anything for her.

I'm open for advice on what I should do?? Should I let her go, or should I stick around with her and continue dating her and fear getting hurt in the long run? Should I date other girls on the side? What should I do? the floor is yours!

just be friends at this point. Since she still has feelings for the ex, I'd beware.

Just go with the flow, have fun, see what happens.

i think you should start dating other people even if shes with you she will still have feeling for that other guy you deserve someone now who wants to be with you and doesnt see you as a booty call

you should let her go. doing that is the hardest thing. i've had to do that. i know you like her but how can you be in a relationship while there are things distracting you and her? if you are ment to be with her then she will come back it may be in a couple of months or years.

Stay. I don't really see the delima?? All of that is natural when ending relationships. Having feelings for an ex? I will always have feelings for the people I have loved. You can't just stop the loving, but look at it differently for whatever reason, like knowing it is not a good situation.

Nothing is ever gaurenteed. Just live it day by day and see what happenes. Fear of getting hurt could cause you to never find love.

Stay as friends and see what happens.

she has feeling for an ex.. she needs to get over him before she could move on. i would keep it slow and simple at this point. and if she is not ready or you then let things stand the way they are now as welll... i know its hard . but it will work in the end...

you know it's right if it feels right

Maybe I'm stupid, well, I know I am stupid when it comes to dating, but if you are seeing her, and she is seeing you isn't that a relationship? So to say your not ready for a relationship, arn't you already in one, the terms and conditions may vary, but call a spade a spade. Unless it is random booty calls, you go out have dinner or a movie on somwhat of a regular basis, you're dating. So if you don't talk about the future, then you are casually dating. Just my thoughts on the matter.
Lil

Whoa girl, Lighten up on yourself.... You actually sound pretty savvy about this hocus pocus dating stuff

I agree, a relationship can be between lovers, family or friends in some capacity. Sounds like they are in a relationship, but are not ready for the "committed" relationship. I personally would not want to be with someone if they are also dating someone else. I think they should continue as they are until they are either ready for the commitment or one decides that they want to be with someone else.

My first rule of thumb in dating is don't expect to get what you can't give. If you can't commit to someone right now you're not going to find someone who is ready to commit, and willing wait around for you.
So it sounds to me like you are both what the other needs right now. Seeing this as a potential long term thing is probably a mistake at this point (even if it eventually works out that way, now is not the time to look to the future for either of you).
Realistically she's really only been away from this guy for a few months that's not enough time to expect someone to not have any feelings for another.
So my opinion is, keep it light and friendly and avoid making any real future plans to do anything, since it could end at any time, and the more plans you have the harder that is to deal with.

I agree with Davey just dont put more into it then there is for now and just go with the flow and see what happens.

I agree

Is there anyone else that you are interested in? By the way it sounds you really like this girl...so just go with things the way they are. If things are meant to be, it will happen. Just continue being friends and let it happen naturally.
Good luck

Go with the flow for a while and see what happens. Stand back and look ot the relationship every once in a while and take notice where it is going. dont try to make it something its not.

Go with the flow for a while and see what happens. Stand back and look ot the relationship every once in a while and take notice where it is going. dont try to make it something its not...

Sorry for the double post...

until she is completely over her ex, she will never be able to emotionally invest in any kind of relationship. you said that you both had things you need to work out. just keep it casual, and give her and yourself space to work out those issues. keeping in contact means that once your issues are resolved, you're still there for eachother. good luck, i believe it will work out for the best either way it goes. depends on what issues you have to work out.