I dated a widow once.
It didn't work because she tried to substitute her dead husband in everything.
I spent time trying to let her see me for who I am but no matter what I said or did, she saw me as him.
He was 5 years gone but she couldn't move on.
I hope she has found someone that fits her memory of him, its not me.

I was always under the impression that
WIDOW is the female that had a husband die,
WIDOWER is the male that had a wife die?

you got it right tom but i think the way mysti wrote it in the op once about both in the same sentence is acceptable

Yeah, I get that too.
That term is what I believe is WIDOWED, the condition of being a widow or widower.

My reference was to: Tomtorillo's question

i didn't catch that cuz he answered himself lol

Yeah sometimes i forget my friend named GOOGLE

stick around and keep posting tomt. your english will come along very quickly.

Look at it this way you don't have to worry about running into the ex.

Yea, that's a tough one...
Guess you have to determine if he is over his ex. Once you have that answer,,,you will know how to proceed.

I lost someone tragically and I can tell you its very difficult to love again, but not impossible too I think for me in todays day and age people are changing all the time and Romance has lost its true touch, Like why are we so lazy to consistently show someone you interested till they are convinced. why say a whole lot of words that don't coincide with actions, I have picked a lot up in the 12 years I am single and the longer I stay single the more I get use to it and it gets more difficult for someone to convince me.. maybe I am the problem or maybe I just know what is right and feels right.. Who knows....

I know exactly how you feel...unfortunately...it turns your whole world upside down. Time may not heal all the wounds but it can help you realize you have to start to live again. Good luck