Yes.. that's right I said it..

I hear it all the time!!.. you have commitment issues... Nay Nay say I....
When did looking for what you want become a commitment issue..?.
You hear it all the time...
You're dating someone! and they keep pushing for more commitment... then the argument starts ....why can't you . Make a commitment to me with me... what's the matter with you?.. one minute you like being with me the next minute you're distant!!. Like you have one foot out the door

..me...Ummm.... because you're not exactly what I'm looking for... but of course you can't tell the other person that..Nay Nay...
But instead
they are what you like right at that moment.. you enjoy being with them you have fun with them... what's wrong with that???...
But there usually is some part ,of their personality.. are some physical traits about them... or some other little quark..
That turns you off or puts you off of them
just slightly !..just enough to make you think I can't see being with them forever.. or fully letting yourself fall for them... because of those one or two little things. About them that drives you crazy....

But it doesn't mean you don't enjoy there company or doing things together you just don't want to make them a life partner...

Where is the problem with that???..

Oh yeah I remember commitment.. the lack of commitment I can't commit ..Nay Nay... it's simply that there's certain things about them that I you cant accept
.
And nobody in their right Minds going to come out and say this stuff to anybody's face that's suicide..lol..

So you stay with them enjoying the fun times and keeping one eye always off to the horizon.. or one foot out the door .. so to speak ..looking for that one person that won't have any little quarks.. that will make you look at them and say to yourself I like who they are they're fun to be with..
BUT!!!..LOL.. yes it's the but that kills it..

So yes is it a matter of being too picky..?
But there's nothing wrong with being picky..
And there's nothing wrong with dating people while you're looking for mr. Or mrs. Right... as long as they don't bug you about why you're not committing to them..omg...

Live in the moment enjoy what's in front of you at that moment.. that's my motto..
.. I can just imagine the flak I'm going to get over this one.
Lmao..

gale garnett

we'll sing in the sunshine



a point to consider tho...

is there a such thing as too picky?

Live in the moment
Think positive and move on
Life is full of ups and downs
The trick is enjoy the ups
And have courage during the downs

Great example.. Jack and Jill are on Internet site they strike up a conversation..
They hit it off.. intellectually they work together.. emotionally they're the same..
They have great profile pictures they're attracted to each other..
They spend a day a week a month talking..
Getting deeper into each other..
Then they do a meet-and-greet..

Jack likes what he sees Jill likes what she sees.. they kiss they hold hands they spend a week doing this..awwww.. isn't it lovely so far.??.lol..
Then that faithful Night Comes..
The night to be intimate..
Soft music in the background Candlelight nice dinner beforehand..
They go into the bedroom..
Jack excuses himself and goes into the bathroom to give to jill some privacy..
Well she disrobes..
Jack does the same in the bathroom..

Now Jack comes back in the bedroom..
There's jill in all her glory.. but what's that Jack sees.?. a giant mole on the side of her breast !!with a hair on it..omg.. he never noticed that before!! how could he.!!she was always in her clothes... he pretends like not to notice... but in the back of his head he's thinking WTF... Jill Smiles at him jack notices somethings missing !!where did her teeth go??.wtf He sees a pair of false teeth sitting on the nightstand..omg.... again. Not exactly the setting.. or the moment.. to freak out about it...


Now at the same time Jill is looking at Jack..
Wondering !!why are his balls.. almost dragging on the floor..omg.... and is he wearing a sweater or is that all chest hair and back hair..wtf.... but not the time or place to say anything of course.....

Now up to that moment they were really into each other.. physically emotionally internationally...... but that's all changed now hasn't it boys and girls..?. but there' still the same people that liked each other before they went into the bedroom...

Up to that point! they were ready to commit to each other..... but now each one of them has some thinking to do.... but they're not going to come out and point out each other's physical shortcomings..Nay Nay.. that would be suicide... and rude...

So after that night a slow steady distance between them starts to happen..

One of them might even say !!..why don't you want to commit to me? why do you seem like you have one foot out the door .. lately... well up to that point the other person probably did want to commit but now they realize the other person.. has a few physical issues.. now the struggle begins internally.. am I really that shallow of a person.. that I can't Overlook a few minor physical flaws...??.. after all they are a really nice person and we get along quite well..but.. I really wanted to be with somebody that had a full set of teeth of Their Own.. or Jill's case.. a guys whose balls don't drag on the floor..lol..

Dilemma dilemma.. are just commitment issues you decide.lol

Hmmm what I see is that you have never really been in love..
because faults cease to exist when in that state.

You want to walk out of that state into a parallel universe
where everyone is perfect.

Well you can have love or you can have perfection methinks.

..yes and no.. I am only speaking to the first initial discovery of imperfection..
Of course later on when you fall deeper in love with someone all imperfections fadeaway...yes.. but that too takes time

..hmm.. for someone who is new here you seem to know a lot about me..
Or at least you think you do like so many others..lol

.. yes when one is in love..
But to reach that moment it takes time..
No one falls in love after one week or a month.. unless you're weak minded..
.. or naive or immature.. True Love Takes Time.. it needs to be cultivated...

But to get there there is self discovery about each other..

. I can't why don't you just tell us

Grabs a massive bag of pop corn, pulls seat close to the table, feet up

.. and I don't break hearts..
I fix them..lol

.. pulls up a chair grabs a handful of popcorn I'll join you..lmao..

.. oh Romeo Romeo where are thou Romeo.. like so many other fairy tales..
True love.. deep love is what I'm talking to..
Infatuation.. the seed that grows into love..
Yes can happen instantly I suppose..

But true deep Love Takes a bit of time

mmmm kay but when do YOU think it has grown sufficiently to admit it and commit or when do you decide it isn't there and start playing we'll sing in the sunshine to her?

can you quantify it?

Oh I love my new puppy dog.
Right up to the moment he ***** on your bed... and starts chewing up your new pair of shoes... love affair over... but after some time.. you grow to love your loyal faithful dog.. truly love him..or her.. and hopefully he or she is no longer misbehaving

ahhh but why is only one of your speeds acceptable? why not some discourse to find common ground and expectations?

..well.. as some have pointed out..
When you truly fall in love with the person their shortcomings no longer matter...
How long it takes to get there is case-by-case... but if you simply can't get over their shortcomings... but you're happy just dating them.. well then the other person usually decides for you..lol... with the why can't you commit to me .. confrontation and argument.. basically forcing your hand..
Now you have to tell them something..
And you're surely not going to tell her it's because she has false teeth.. that would be Shallow and rude... but in reality you just want somebody that has their own teeth..
Nothing wrong with that

won't not can't and and if he did thread would die and no one would see, learn or gain from it if he killed his own thread

.. as far as your question goes as to how much time it takes to fall in love...
It takes as much time as it takes.. but the other person might not want to wait forever.. for you to decide if you love them or not...

. Pardon me Madam..lol.. I do not Dodge or go around in circles..lol...
I answere questions as I see fit and when I see fit.. thank you very much..lol