i am disabled with degenerative disk disease and also degenerative S.I. disease.i walk with a cane and sometimes walk with a walker around my house.
it just hurts that men won,t accept me with my disability.i guess it takes a very special man to date and eventualy take care of her.

'Eventually take care of her' your words not mine, so basically in the future he will become your nurse? Wow.

I have bi-polar disorder and receive disability and live with family for some guys it seems to be a turn off but there might be the one that doesn"t mind, I am on medication but I live a healthy and normal life just like everyone else you can"t judge a book by it"s it"s always best to get to know the person first

that's true lady. You are on the right track of thinking.

I suggest that you visit sites which say that they offer dating opportunities for people with disabilities...I googled "dating sites for people with disabilities" and the response was a listing of several or more available dating sites...All the best to you...

On my personal point of view,I think men are very sceptical about disabled people especially in a relationship,to them it's like if you date a disabled woman you're not normal and that's wrong!Men don't usually look into the heart when they love but appearance,we're sometimes scared of hurting a person we become too protective whereas we're hurting them on the other side.Men don't want to ill treat women it just happens,imagine if this woman is also disabled,wouldn't it be defined as he's taking advantage of a disabled person?So it's a bit complicated to date a woman of such because also,women are fragile naturally once you make a mistake she would bring her disability status up and surely you'll feel bad almost all your life.

I have nothing against disabled women.
I just don't want to date one for two reasons:
1. The sex is limited.
I don't mean limited in the amount of sex, a man gets that with any other woman after a few months of dating. I mean limited in the way that she would not be able to satisfy me as far as the positions.
2. Men are more discriminated by women when they're handicapped than women are so I balance the equation by acting and not dating handicapped women.

And before you go ahead and berate me and judge me for my choice, I'll claim the feminist position that as a Woman I have the right to chose my partner.
Just change the gender in that last sentence... or leave it, since we're equal, right?

I think there is a big difference in dating /starting a relationship with someone who is disabled and being in a relationship /married to someone who becomes disabled. The love is already established, although it could strain the relationship I think most would be able to work through it.
Good luck.

Sorry to hear this. Men won't date me because of my looks or my age. I feel your pain but there are few men and women for that matter that won't judge a book by its cover. My friends ask why I stay single and I explain that if I can't be accepted for who I am; why even try? All we can do is live out our lives and see that there is so much to enjoy in life and we need not be coupled up to feel complete.

We each have our limitations and handicaps. It is the nature of human beings. Some of those limitations and handicaps might garner more sympathy and respect than others, but it doesn't change how practically real they are.

And the only thing any of us can do, is accept them. Whether the challenge is as great and "unjust" as the kind of physical problems you have, or as small and disrespected as a social inhibition, they are all just as real, and just as limiting, and just as impossible to fix by complaining. No one has ever had a fulfilling relationship with anyone else, by trying to guilt-trip them into pretending not to mind the problems.

And while I do vastly prefer people who have matured and experienced enough in life, such that they know and live love as something more than a carnival ride, and view their mate as more than an entertainment center, I also realize that those who don't, haven't purposely CHOSEN to be so unaware. They are ignorant of, and unable to experience the full range of what complete love is about, by chance of their OWN experiential handicaps and limitations.

I personally wouldn't have a problem with dating a blind woman, or even a deaf one. Learning sign language has always been a dream of mine.

Some people also don't mind a woman who already has kids. Me for example, having lost my mother at a young age, find myself often flirting with women that already have children.

You know, another handicapped/disabled person would
see you as the same as they are.

Have you tried focusing on a group like that?
They might be happy to jump your bones :-)

navygirl, There is nothing wrong with your looks or age and thank you for the work that you do.

Hi missourigal,

Maybe for some men, a disability is an unknown and they're not sure how to approach the subject of a disability. Instead of talking with the person as they would anybody else, they pause, not sure what to say.

Men may wonder what their responsibilities would be in a relationship with a person with a disability. The unknowns and questions will tend to keep some men (and women) from considering forming a relationship.

Hopefully, they would treat anyone with any type of disability (physical or emotional)the same as everyone else, with respect, understanding and compassion. Unfortunately, not everyone is capable of that.

Best of luck to you.

It may be, that like most people, they look for one who can participate on their level. I am very active and I look for men who can keep up with me.
Men who have physical disabilities, in some cases, would just slow me down or not be able to keep up. I expect some men to not be interested in me because of my age. I understand that. So I look for men in or near my own age group. But they also have to be on a physical level compatible with me. Maybe you should go for men who are also disabled.

Actually, I wouldn't have a problem dating a mute.

Okay if I date you does it mean every time I clap my hands the lights will go off.?.
Clap on clap off..lol.. one more question if you have a power wheelchair can I borrow it from time to time.. you know just to run over to the corner store to grab a pack of cigs... now do I get to sponge bath you or do we have somebody to do that for us.?..
Because personally I'd kind of want a sponge bath you myself..wink..
And a little finishing note we're all disabled in some way or another.. some of us more inwardly than others.. but with all dating..
It's either a match or it is not.. a shoe for every foot but not all shoes fit every foot..yes.. your Prince Charming.. is out there like everyone you just have to keep looking

I have courted two disabled women.
One a head injury from an accident that maimed her and killed her husband, the other is a double mastectomy survivor of breast cancer.

Both women had issues that prevented me from getting close. I tried but it was not possible for me to open their shells.

I am disabled. I will never get better than I am right now and tomorrow, may not come. But...I am not hung up about it anymore.

I'm willing to work with any limitations as long as they don't have a personal issue dealing with their own disability. I expect them to understand my limitations too.

As a man with a disability, it is very difficult to find a woman that can deal with my limitations.

Note to self. Keep tongue well and truly bitten........for now

Op,
I feel for ya. I take care of my Dad. So i know how hard it can be. But in the end as Sophie said...you should focus on people from the same demographic as yours..

Your post has some anger and confusion. But, you are guaranteeing that that love interest becomes your permanent care giver. Maybe you should just focus on growing the relationship, and not push a final solution, until that individuals is trully in love with you.

Ive had 2 NDEs...
They've taught me one thing.
The love of The Creator is eternal.
When we die...we do it ALONE.
Make your best friend be yourself....this way, if it doesnt work out...you wont be alone. I hope this helps. Good luck!

Personally I have nothing against disabled women but however... I do like to break them myself..frist... it's kind of like getting a broken toy right out of the box.. takes the fun out of baking them yourself later