Although I have been on this site for a while, I noticed one thing. men are contacting me and asking questions which are in my profile. It seems they don't read profiles before sending you a message. it's really upsetting because in my profile my state that I'm disabled and yet if I strike up a conversation with someone who's contacted me and tell them I'm disabled, I don't hear a word after that. why don't men read the profiles

If they don't read, then you have the choice of not replying or blocking

wait , did you say something ? ? ? ?

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not all guys are like that
and i agree with yellow on this one

as well as , they might be testing you about your answers on your profile .... or they could just be trying to break the ice

<shrug>
guess its all in the way ya look at it
best wishes on your hunt

I read every profile before i send a message. I hate it when women say ask me !

Understand that is hard to deal with, but I think there's very little you can do about it.
Some read profiles, many don't. Maybe it's best that before you get into conversation you ask if they have read your profile or not. And simply count on this sort of thing happening a lot, no matter how harsh it is.

The only other thing would be to put MS in your headline, but I doubt you'd feel happy about that either...
Whatever you do, good luck!

I think they may send the same standard message to lots of women as I get messages that sometimes are very general and could be to anyone, not all I must add, I am sorry to hear that you do not hear from them when you say you are disabled, but then that's a good thing because it shows how shallow some people can be xxx

Believe it or not, many "women" here don't seem to be able to read a profile either. Many, Many cannot even understand a message sent to them. Answer the simplest question such as "Where are you located"...Dang near forget that!

Hang tough. As most things this Mingle deal is not all that quick for success of one's pursuits usually.

When a guy says "hi" and that's it does he really expect me to teply to a "hi"? Jeez! Lol

I have responded to a hi.
I figure if I was out and about, and someone said hi to me, I would respond. Why not here..?

Photos are more popular on many free date sites , overlooking reading profiles!

Hi lynseywin

Don't let that upset you. Lots of people don't read profile. I had specified in my profile on how to message me and so I know that most of the men who had contacted me did not read my profile and I just ignore them. Except those that made me laughed.. those I thank for making me laugh and say good luck in your search.

Those who don't reply back are not serious about you anyway. But don't delete the communication between the two of you. Here's what you should do... if they contact you again, say "Sorry, you are not my type." That would infuriate them and might send you something abusive... then you go report them by clicking the Abuse Button AND then block the A-hole.

I hope this helps or at least made you smile.

Lots of reasons, depending on the guy.

- Some guys read the profile and only retain the information that is relevant to them. "Female? Check. Age I'm looking for? Check. No kids? Check. Non bbw? Check. Said something more than 'I'll fill this out later?' so higher potential she's serious? Check."

- Some guys only really care if you're "online now."
They'd rather contact you and try to catch you, get into a conversation with you now, rather than spend 3,5,300 minutes memorizing your profile, only to contact you, but you've signed off by then and who knows when or if you'll ever be back.

- Some guys get tired of no response at all. They've read profiles, they've analyzed profiles, they've typed long responses showing great insight into the other persons profile...for nothing, so feel there's no benefit to it.

- Some guys have read profiles and memorized them, then talked to a woman online and find that she has absolutely no idea what is in her own profile. She typed it up a month, 6 months, a year, 8 years ago. So he brings up something in her profile and she's all "what? What are you talking about? Ohhhhh, I forgot about that..."

- Some guys simply prefer conversations to homework.

- Some guys just look at the pictures. If they like it, just contact and talk.

- Some guys have more experience using other dating apps that focus on just pictures and then conversation without there being profiles at all.

- Some guys have more experience with profiles being just full of crap and relatively meaningless, begin to see all profiles as full of crap and relatively meaningless, so stop looking for "the one" profile that may not be, which just becomes not paying attention to profiles at all.

- Some guys read the profile and pretend not to in order to see how you'll respond/react to their asking the same question.

- Some guys read the profile, but are excited to talk and get a response, that the information is shunted into their subconscious. So on a level they know what your profile says, but it comes through via questions they already know the answer to.
Kinda like Chris Farley interviewing Jeff Daniels.

- Some guys are talking to other women at the same time, there's a lull in that conversation so they just click on a new profile of someone that's online to fill in the waiting period.

I'm sure there are a lot more reasons.

Take your pic.
One reason is as good as any other.

Your profile is not your buffer against people.
There's no protection or security to be had by it.


There's no evidence they didn't read your profile.
You don't really give examples of your conversations though.
For all I know you're contacting scammers and they drop you because they found a more lively fish to fleece or their shift at Fraud Inc. is up.

But I can easily see where they read in your profile that you're disabled, but then during the first conversation you bring it up, start talking about it, they figure out that it's something that defines you and is a big deal to you, so are turned off by that.

Big difference between just having "disabled" in your profile, and then sending a message like "you sure you're interested? You know I'm disabled right. It sucks. I can't do this, that, the other. I really hate it. How can you be interested? Why would you talk to me?"

I don't know the conversations you're having.

Just saying, from what you've presented, it could just as easily be insecurity about your disability rather than they're not reading your profile.