Ok. Here goes.
I've never had a one night stand, but had it in mind and didn't follow through.
There have been 2 times in my life that I've thought about it, one of those times i truly had the intention.
But i have this disease called conscience.
I can't speak for all women. Only for myself.
The person who was in my life had abandoned the relationship for no reason. One day things were good. The next day they weren't.
I was hurt. Pissed. Confused.
I wanted to lash out in a way that would make him hurt the way i was hurting. (No. He didn't cheat on me)
Also i wanted to feel like I'm desirable.
A handful of us went out for ladies night. I borrowed some of my cousin's clothes. (Mine are more grandma style).
Hers gave the right effect in all the right places.
Had a couple of drinks. Met a guy who asked me to dance. Then he got a little friendly. Dance a little closer. Whisper in my ear. It would be easy to go off soewhere and do our thing.
But deep down i knew that's not really going to solve anything. And may give me bigger issues than the ones already in my head.
You ask about separating feelings. Some of us can't.
Your original post mentions intimacy.
There is a difference between intimacy and sex. Sex is a basic animal function. Intimacy involves fellings and allowing ourself to be vulnerable.
You ask about the purpose if this. Had i gone through with this my purpose was to hurt someone else and somehow to feel validated. To feel attractive.
Anyhow that's just me.

scepticalsoulmate and dreamerana, thank you for your post, I believe that for the most part, there are mix feelings about this topic, on the female side. Females tend to walk away from this type of lifestyle.

yw

I'm ready

hey

I think this is a futile practice that leads to way more misery for men and women than it does relief.

People can justify and brag how it is a victimless exchange but it rarely is. Someone usually ultimately regrets it.

Sometimes, rarely, people will get lucky and the consequences are pretty tame. THANKFULLY fewer sexual encounters result in unwanted pregnancy. What most will not admit is the risk for other consequences is actually higher. And MANY are NOT curable. Especially when the cures,or at least containment, come down to the almighty dollar in major amounts .

IF you can leave out the moral implications, which I think very few people do in the long run, maybe it is just part of the sexual learning curve. Alas a pretty poor way to learn technique but I dare say for some maybe the only way. That alone is pretty dehumanizing. Especially if you figure this kind of exchange is pretty simple raw barter that any animal can do.

Pretty sure this sometimes harder to reconcile morally than the other consequences because most people have some kind of sense of the implications that being sexual with another is meaning. And whatost want it to mean.

Definitely think about 90 % have little or nothing to do with the partner. Sad in modern society it is often just to dump the stigma of being non-sexual. Like that makes you somehow defective if you haven't lived up to the quota of sex arbitrarily being promoted at the moment. What is even sadder is the the substitution of sex for basic human contact. A fact that jives with how and when most that do have one night stands do it; the typically disconnected times of life.

Probably why I often talk about keeping your knickers up when you are feeling tempted to fly them like a defiant lets party flag. It really more often than not a flag of distress or surrender flag.

when young ... I had a few night stands ...
but mainly the attraction to them ...know alcohol or drugs ...
and it was to see if there could be a relationship ...
but some wanted more ... and others I did not want more ...
so they either ended it or I did ...

but I think what I don't like now is ...
men saying the best way to get over a women ...
is go have sex with another one ...


I grew up way to fast lol
so much has changed from when I was young ...

you're absolutely right sleeping with another woman is not the best way.. but !sleeping with two women on the other hand...lol..jk

If you ever see someone having to be chronically ill from an STD or dying of HIV/Aids because someone in their chain of sexual contacts got reckless the humor kind of drains out of this subject.

With 1 in 30 Boomer's HepC infected which often only becomes known when vital organs like liver's failing an racking up huge medical debt that wipes out a lifetime of personal wealth before they even hit the end of life care that falls on the backs of the younger generation taxpayers seems selfish.

I wonder if we can revisit this again for a second, I wonder, females tend to when intercourse, create link between the couple during and after the act. I wonder if males feel the same thing. Can we turn it off?, .

yea she is guilty of self disclosure which is actually a good thing as it demonstrates her maturity to reflect and see what role she played and what were the results of her choices a wise and insightful process yet few seek to travel as insight requires a modicum of courage and many cannot face and so simply deny its presence...

So everyone else's post is insignificant.. Lol.

for real

one night affair = temporary sexual satisfaction without emotional attachments ? i dont know any human who could turn emotions on or off so how is it managed????

Good that you are not a Rocket Scientist.

hi I am there

habits or entertainment can work without emotional attachment,

when one learns to view sex in such a way,, it probably isnt hard to manage

are you letting your fantasy out now ...

Hi